- bandito 💜
@ogheneyxle
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arsenal 🔴⚪️ | DC | kintsukuroi 💛 | amazing writer | part-time menace
Gotham 🃏♦️
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Pinned Tweet
whatsapp memes are probably the most unintentionally funny thing in the world 😭
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i have a better idea, if you can’t sell your products and they’re not bad yet, instead of pouring them down the drain, give it out for free and call it whatever — discount, giveaway or just charity. idk but that’s how i see it
Dear vendors, how do you feel when no one is buying what you're selling?
This is painful.
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Kini vs Innit
England will face Nigeria in the World Cup Round of 16! 🏴🇳🇬
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you might need classes if you think there’s anything like 8:99😭😭
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me, when my brain auto suggests a word that absolutely fits in the context but I've never actively used it so I gotta check to be sure 😂
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even in prayer, you’re not the one with the money
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Ronaldo thought he could escape. for every siuu there's a tomiyasiuuuuuu
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“I win my own, make una win una own”😂
Good luck to the Super Eagles 🦅 today! Make the nation proud, we are all behind you!! 🇳🇬 🏆
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osita iheme
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watching it with them, pausing it and gathering your thoughts. gasping, laughing and pressing play again>>
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i tell you if nigeria was a stable country with a stable economy, we’d probably make more trouble 😂
Ghana Jollof Has No Flavour- Chef Hilda Baci
Someone help me educate her that her records in the Big book wasn’t the best chef so she should know her place.
Nigeria Jollof that tastes like Gravels 🤭
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early haaland
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“if na me now you for don de shout”
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watch go just de shout “omo”
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banks won’t accept checks like this, waec, neco, even secondary schools won’t accept exam scripts like this, why are we allowing this to fly for something a huge as the presidential elections??
This is the
@inecnigeria
they want us to trust. This is it. Una go see wetin una dey find!! Bastards!
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I think the most [unintentionally] romantic thing I’ve said was when my girl was traveling late and I was worried af. called and called and when she picked up I said “shey you know say na only you I get?”😂
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the best drink fr. drink it alongside fried meat, especially from wedding where you know there’s family strife
Very refreshing. Y’all should try finishing one of these at a go. (It should be really chilled).
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this why aliens never bother africa in the movies
May the price of fuel come down
May the price of fuel come down.
May the price of fuel come down
Amen
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i don’t even have the words. the gorilla reference? the song? the slide???? the switch???? this is cinema
i’ve just seen the coolest, funniest and somehow simultaneously hottest transition video ever😭
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“To the church in soweto, abba says haba” 😂
The letters Paul for don write to churches in Africa if he dey alive. No be for here.
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even newton go fear, object at rest still de shake😭
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Sending my mom a lot of money
If you suddenly have "fuck you" money, what is the first thing you’re doing??🤔
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can we come together as a people and just crown this the greatest nonalcoholic drink in the country?
I’m honestly not a fan of anything mixed with coconut, but THIS!!
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“i check your own, you get A”
"Are you alone, check your snap"
Is there a better phrase than this????
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there’s de-ogoring surgery??
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superior dark? oh you know they added kiwi polish 😭😭
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there’s having a collection, hoarding and ignoring God’s desire for you to open store
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whatever they did to make him look younger made him look much older even
Priscilla Ojo and Eni Adeoluwa in the first look at 'All of Us', an upcoming high-school series that marks Adeoluwa's producing debut.
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tiwa a better person than me, i’d bite her yansh 😭
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makes you wonder what the woman is doing wrong, cause football clubs do a lot of wrongs
men are capable of loving just one football team but incapable of loving just one woman.
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did hitler teach you math?
Wait
So it’s “raise to power” not “race to power”💀 Nigeria you will crumble
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even for depression, classism dey?
Some of you aren’t depressed,just sad.If real depression hold you,I doubt if you would have strength to be on social media.
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lmfao everyone sees it right?
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“i’m not the bank. i’m the bank’s regulator”
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we didn’t winnit 😔
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so after davido na you?
I buy Virtual card 3k
I buy Twitter blue tick 8k
Elon Musk pay me..
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nothing, i can finally do nothing
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bruh you marketed crowwe, are you manifesting various versions of ment?
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“get me to 1k guys”
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i was just discussing with someone today at the gym that nigerians are largely delusional, and i’m not even saying it as an insult, but a lot of the populace are neck-deep in delusion
Time for xiaomi and other brands to start shipping these in.
With these fuel prices
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beans is not ewa, but get this, ewa is beans.
Time does not heal emotional trauma
Emotional trauma heals with time.
- Pst Bolaji Idowu
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because e get bank advert voice? lmfao
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Ronaldo de find challenge, united give am trials and tribulations with sprinkle of hurdles and difficulties😭
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she didn't show up. had to sell the extra movie ticket. it was my birthday
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😭😭😭
This babe dey always bring me food and it's never sweet. God, I'm tired of this torture
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so yesterday was literally premenopausal day? there’s no way the universe doesn’t have an architect 😭
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toyota car mmri 😂👌🏾
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depend on who braid the hair sha
Attachment isn't a joke, you feel physical pain when you miss that person.
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Well the doctors are angry, I’ll give you that
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“oya bring am na, na wa sha”
we don’t even react anymore when sellers increase prices. entire country is jaded
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do you know how extra rich your diet has to be for bread and akara to cause food poisoning?😭 lord in heaven
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my turn!
#BrandedFeatures
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the way you packaged this thing my brain will immediately categorize it as “snack” 😭 i go use am watch film
Deboned catfish
N19,000
Neat, sand free, well dried!
100/100✅
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drake probably has a lot of these songs that flew super low under the radar 😂
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change the music to portable and it’s an ick
She got lit to “Just Wanna Rock” by Lil Uzi Vert at her wedding. 😭😭
🎥 IG: evolshi.bnxsis
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witnessing a slow but graceful transition into an MJ style celeb status, not bad at all
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lmfao god please, no be true crimes evidence photos be this????
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“have u eaten?”= ur continued existence is my only desire, please find sustenance or i can provide it for you
“eat for me”= re:“have you eaten” + i will perish if u perish
“wyd?”= inform me of what occupies u while i was away
you de find verbatim when romance dey your front
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this is why more women should ask guys out on dates and pay. they seem to know the best options 🙏🏾
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marvel has the opportunity to do the funniest thing
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“love you too”
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i’m always dating to marry sha, because i no see why i to toast you finish because i just get spare six months to waste.
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there’s no way you people use this same brain to raise children and work in companies
So Zaynab returned the car that he bought for her??? She is really 22!!!! Mschew! Is he returning all the juices he extracted from her body! One minute I am team Alhaji, the next minute I take back my support!
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these brothers are bringing back music videos that match the song’s messaging? you know they grew up on MTVBASE😂
Na Shalli Dey write but na Shakespeare dey shake, Plutomanias get ready for “Shakespopi” Birthday 12🎉, Album 12, Pluto day 12🐢🪐
We feast on the 12th of April ❤️🥾
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na why them no like fine guy when know say e fine.😂
An awful lot of Nigerian women genuinely believe them liking you back is them doing you a favour.
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oga nobody asked na, wetin you de do??
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57k used to be expensive phones that year lmfao, now it’s price for augmentin
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nigerians sha, small adversity we don roll over set yansh for doggie. “the president”?? abeg dfpmo
I hope the president doesn’t employ tone deaf youths like he had leading his campaign. Or like the current president did.
Empathy is key.
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may i introduce, Sir Pa
I need a personal trainer that can turn me to this in the next six months for a movie role I’m auditioning for.
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immediately the video started, i don already de laugh, because why is the shadow so big????😭
😭 you know that fear that the ceiling fan might fall!?? just saw the funniest video about it
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do you people see that he doesn’t have to praise her using comparison. she just IS, not because others are or aren’t, she’s just enough and still in abundance to him.
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never forget the four Fs: fine, fresh, funny
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“education is the key to success”
you and your third class:
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this is lowkey proof babes don’t know what we like because this is going to be so cool if a girl you like sends it😂
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they have no idea, having light at night is so calming
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God’s slang
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i’m actually lazy, i know because i know my capabilities and i know i lack the motivation or ambition to do anything with them
Stop gaslighting yourself into the narrative you're lazy when you're really burnt-out and exhausted AF from being in survival mode for so long .
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you won’t even know you’re having three different conversations with them on three different apps concurrently
I promise you, love is not a chore. If you really like/love someone, you won't even know that you've texted them every few minutes, each day, for 365days. Being toxic is not a flex, you look ridiculous please.
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the same women that propped this, turned round to say he trying to tie her down now😂
Michael B Jordan played NO GAMES for Valentine’s Day this year & rented out the aquarium for his boo Lori Harvey 👏🏽❤️👀
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boys will literally throw the cheating friend into the river at 1:30am, that’s how much we detest it. if you can cheat on your babe, you can kill us, and we no need enemies for the friend group.
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a respectful yoruba bear, it even took off its ice cap🤭
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these kind of men never date or marry high quality women btw. they don’t even attract them
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glad i wasn’t born in the era of sword fighting, war and battles steady, and i be first born of first born of first born. how i wan take defend my house? 😭
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nothing go sup, the same eleda no see say you need money too? make e send na
If you promise me money unprovoked and not send it,my eleda will shepe for you
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bruh, you hate your girlfriend, we get it. please leave us the fuck alone.
Bro your life will literally be falling apart and your girl will still expect you to talk to her all day…
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