not all geminis
@notallgeminis
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astro memein' and dreamin' /// mostly on ig /// she/her
Los Angeles, CA
Joined May 2018
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Pinned Tweet
Just realized I have not spammed Twitter about my new merch. Forgive me I will now be spamming
Available on
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To All The Boys Whose Birth Charts I Have Done Without Their Knowledge
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trying to talk to a Capricorn or Scorpio about their childhood
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A word of advice: never ask someone with Virgo or Scorpio placements why they’re mad at someone you love if you aren’t ready to have your opinion of them change. You will not accomplish your goal of defending them; you will have your illusions of their character shattered.
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HAPPY VIRGO SEASON! START WAKING UP AT THE SAME TIME EVERY DAY! FIND JOY IN ROUTINES! CONFRONT YOUR ROOMMATE ABOUT THE DISHES! BUY SPECIFIC KINKWARE! DO YOGA! MAKE YOUR NERDY ASS NICHE JOKES! HONOR YOUR COMMITMENTS! INVEST IN PRESENTABLE LEISURE CLOTHING! READ A FUCKIN BOOK!
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Started my period on the first day of Gemini season because I bleed for my people
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placements that make me truly smile when i see them in a chart:
- taurus moon
- cancer rising
- leo rising
- scorpio venus
- gemini mercury
- libra suns
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I just think it’s funny how Geminis, Leos, and Scorpios get the most shit of the zodiac and then when people start asking “best sex you’ve ever had?” the answers start changing...
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okay fellow anxious gemini and virgo placements what are our tips for calming down our heart rates??
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🗣️IT'S GEMINI SEASON PEOPLE 🗣️
TIME TO
- spark a meaningless, but strangely heated debate
- text back "sorry just saw this" 24 hours later
- get distracted by something you read online and take another 40 min to leave the house for the grocery store
- use memes instead of words
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i'm baby: aries, taurus, gemini, cancer, leo, libra, pisces
i'm daddy: virgo, scorpio, sagittarius, capricorn, aquarius
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Some of y’all have dated air signs and it DOESN’T show because they definitely didn’t put you on their instagrams :/
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air sign culture is submitting work between the hours of 3-6 am because if literally anyone is awake i WILL get distracted, want to talk to someone, and accomplish nothing
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Ellen and Portia are a double Aquarius couple... just something to think about
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HOW GEMINI SEES THE SIGNS (pt 1)
♈ so what reckless decision are we making today bb??
♉ can u stop slandering me pls
♊ a fellow cold bitch <3
♋ i wasn't TRYING to hurt your feelings
♌ u fun bitch ! go off !
♍ so what are we bitching about in intense detail today??
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gay: leo virgo scorpio aquarius
rat: aries gemini sagittarius capricorn
wedding: taurus cancer libra pisces
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thinking about becoming less annoying in 2020 but i think it would be bad for my brand
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all golden retrievers are leos, but not all leos are golden retrievers
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the sign i am most thankful for is virgo. the rest of y'all can go
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No one:
Virgos: don’t forget we have BEYONCÉ Virgos can be bad bitches too!!!!
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The signs' responses to memes:
Seen: Aries, Gemini, Aquarius
Dragged: Taurus, Scorpio
Attacked: Cancer, Leo, Pisces
"Me": Virgo, Libra, Sagittarius, Capricorn
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HOW GEMINI SEES THE SIGNS (pt 2)
♎ soulmate status
♏ chill on the couch n talk shit friend
♐ ur me.... but louder
♑ stop budgeting my adventures dad!!!
♒ smarty pants bff that makes u laugh ur ass off
♓ omg it was a j o k e i cant deal w ur sensitivity
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HAPPY SAGITTARIUS SEASON! TIME TO:
✨dance to britney
✨read a fucking book
✨spend a gratuitous amount of time yearning on airbnb
✨pick up a new hobby
✨drop your old hobbies
✨pick up a new hobby again
✨insult your uncle and cackle
✨wink at a stranger
✨irish goodbye
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Water signs are so mad that Stevie Nicks is a Gemini
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HAPPY SCORPIO SZN Y'ALL!!
TIME TO:
😈 read into a text!
😈 glare at people without explanation!
😈 stalk your ex's new SO's little sister's twitter!
😈 choose one person to form a really intense bond with, and then call everyone else you know fake!
😌 be a really good friend :~)
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you're really just a boneless -
aries: n/a
taurus: scorpio
gemini: sagittarius
cancer: scorpio
leo: n/a
virgo: capricorn/scorpio
libra: leo/gemini
scorpio: n/a
sagittarius: n/a
capricorn: aries
aquarius: leo
pisces: n/a
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summoning circle, hope this works
🕯
🕯 🕯
🕯 kindness 🕯
🕯 from older 🕯
🕯 astrologers 🕯
🕯 🕯
🕯
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Virgo culture is cleaning other people's shit because you just can't stand to see it look like that anymore
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bitch?? we hate you do you really want to play this game???
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HAPPY PISCES SEASON LIL FISHIES!! ♓️🐟
Time to:
- take long epsom salt baths
- cancel plans to hang with yourself
- learn how to read tarot
- stay in bed til 3pm
- be extra mushy with ur luvr
- tell people about your dreams whether they care or not
- do a bob ross painting
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you know what dua lipa is right. i bet it IS exhausting being a leo. having to dress well and learn how to do eyebrows and come up with stories and cheer people up all the time just to get called extra and annoying for doing the very things that delight us all.
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Words I see associated w/ the signs daily that have become meaningless to me
Aries: passion
Taurus: reliable
Gemini: wit
Cancer: nurture
Leo: magnetism
Virgo: analytical
Scorpio: devotion
Sagittarius: adventure
Capricorn: ambition
Aquarius: detached
Pisces: feelings
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clearing out my computer and found this old meme, what a classic
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The most Cancer rising thing about my little brother is that he mostly uses Instagram to look at golden retriever fan accounts
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“Is she perverted like me? Would she go down on you in a theater?”
- Alanis Morisette, Gemini sun/Scorpio moon/Aries rising
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MAD LIBS TIME!
Fill in the sentence: I am a [SUN], but in my heart I feel like [MOON]. On a first impression, you might assume I’m [RISING]. I speak [MERCURY], and in love I [VENUS]. I have been described as having [MARS] energy.
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Twitter is so much funnier than Instagram but infinitely more brutal and depressing
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meeting up with my sister after like 4 months apart and the first thing she said to me was "you smell weird"
We should start a thread of times we were unexpectedly roasted by a Virgo
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one time a cancer commented some mean bullshit on my account and i replied, verbatim, "hey shut up" and they sent me a DM that was 4 paragraphs long about how their dad died and i have no right to pick on them and ask my followers to attack them (after receiving a single comment)
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CANCER: y’all think water signs are soft?? Check out this shell and these pincers, bitch!! 🦀
SCORPIO: water signs? Soft?? Have you seen this big ass stinger for my big ass rage?? 🦂
PISCES: guys wtf where’s my bodily weapon 🐠
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geminis are virgos who like attention and hate schedules
virgos are geminis who can actually show up on time to the appointments on their equally diverse and crammed calendars
is the world ready to talk about this????
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HAPPY VIRGO SEASON BITCHES *sergeant whistle* TIME TO GET YOUR LIVES TOGETHER
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Happy New Years can Virgos resolve to be less insufferable?
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Simultaneously wanting people to laugh at all of your jokes, while not treating YOU like a joke and having everyone think you’re smart, is Gemini culture (CC: Sagittarius, Leo)
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THE SIGNS AS BRITNEY SPEARS' ICONIC GRAPHIC TEES!! HAPPY BIRTHDAY GODNEY!! 💕
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GEMINI MOON CULTURE
Every single thing i say is a joke i have never beens serious in my life... when I sleep I say jk....and when i wake up i say lol. i pee applause and none of my relationships are real and i am resigned to be a jester for hot people my entire life...
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how's a girl to choose which pic to use for kacey musgraces on the leo collage when they're all SO LEO???
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can we talk about how fuckin SOFT geminis are?? geminis are sweeties they just want to you to like them 😔
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Virgo rising anecdote: someone once asked me to stop telling them why I had problems with people in my life bc they couldn’t handle seeing the world through my misanthropic, judgmental, accurate eyes
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When a Gemini was talking shit about someone they hate right as the person walked by and they say “good, I hope they heard”
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if your content isn't for you, then who the fuck is it for?
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"I thought this account was only for Geminis"
"Do you know an account that's exclusively about Leos?"
"Where can I find an IG that only posts my sign?"
1. I don't know, I don't care
2. Please learn to care about a single other person in your life
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what's your mercury sign and what are your favorite words?
i'm a gemini mercury and some of mine are:
- obtuse
- fervent
- meticulous
- ridiculous
- extremely
- insane
- bitch
- lovebug
- snuggle
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have y'all ever realized you have a really similar chart to someone/a celebrity and become very afraid???
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happy bisexuality visibility day! i knew i was bisexual when i accidentally saw this scene in elementary school wbu
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Is this Leo culture?
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I just feel like an Aquarius runs this account idk man
If your relatives ask "What do you want to do with your life?" at any point today, feel free to say one of the following:
- Sea witch
- Town elder
- Ancient god
- Oracle whose prophecies no one ever believes, ultimately leading to much death and destruction
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Gemini culture is never texting people first but then texting back 5 texts minimum every time
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Fire signs: joints
Earth signs: pipes
Air signs: vapes
Water signs: bongs
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So who’s gonna tell Virgos that policing spelling and grammar is classist and annoying
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Rihanna at home last night ignoring our pleas for her arrival
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weird adult brags:
- taking advanced classes when you were a child
- SAT score
- interesting birth stories (ex. born w/ umbilical cord around neck)
- being born in nyc/abroad
- how early you smoked weed
- anyways i was born with my umbilical cord around my neck
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Might stop memeing cancers altogether tbh I’m sick of y’all telling me I don’t get you!!! I know!! I’m only including you to be nice!! I don’t need the whining and bitching!!! If I pick another sign to leave out, I could fit 10 signs in one post....
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me online shopping yesterday vs me looking at my bank account today
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when you meet someone with the same birth chart placements as yours but you still don't vibe
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i just turned 27 and the idea of spending time with someone who i'd have to buy the alcohol for because she is *checks notes* NINETEEN?? is unfathomable to me
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the first thing eminem ever liked on instagram was an astrology meme. amazing
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