Noel Anthony Conway
@noel360
Followers
3K
Following
77K
Media
216
Statuses
4K
Uncertain around certainty, tired of drifting, the search for purpose and meaning continues....! #PunGent. No DM's, ta!
Cheltenham, UK
Joined November 2010
Some wrong'un has stolen all my Dolly Parton, Kenny Rogers and Garth Brooks records... I WANT MY COUNTRY BACK! #LunchPun
#RateMyPun
4
3
45
I've got a new business selling dodgy appliances, and I've decided to call this new shop 'Life'... Because there are no guarantees... #LunchPun #Wednesdaywit
0
0
17
Actor Jeff Goldblum did such a wonderful job mowing my lawn I slipped him an extra £20 note on top of his fee to show my appreciation... The Police have now charged me with Fly tipping... #LunchPun #MondayMirth
0
0
31
Me: I've called my new orbiting space station 'Joan of Arc'... Them: Satellite? Me: Yes, alas she was... #MondayMirth #LunchPun
0
1
13
"The division that's been created is absolutely disgusting. Mainly created by angry middle-aged white men who know exactly what they're doing." - Gary Neville.
1K
4K
23K
Me: Welcome to my dinner party, please come in... Avocado: Thank you for halving me! #LunchPun
#sidesplittingsunday
0
0
7
Sad news that Dame Patricia Routledge, famous for playing Hyacinth Bucket in Keeping Up Appearances, has died aged 96. May she Rest in Peace.
10
60
570
I’ve named my friends after major High Street stores, you could be Next��.. #LunchPun
1
1
17
Jane Goodall, ethologist and conservationist, has died. She was 91
728
18K
102K
Robert Redford has died at 89 years old. The film icon starred in classic movies such as "Butch Cassidy and the Sundance Kid" and "All the President's Men," won an Oscar for directing “Ordinary People” and founded the Sundance Film Institute. https://t.co/MLJnHZHcWg
2K
22K
74K
I've just been fired from my job as a Gamekeeper for grouse misconduct... #tuesdaytitters
0
0
9
We have now finished with our trial of the #EmergencyAlert system If you did not receive an alert on your mobile phone, then this was due to the fact that you are not scheduled to survive the upcoming extinction level event Unfortunately not everyone will make it, which is
225
758
6K
I am sickened by the relentless demonisation of refugees. No refugee underfunded a school. No refugee closed a hospital. No refugee took away support from the sick and disabled. We need solutions not scapegoats. Stop blaming refugees and tax the rich instead!
6K
10K
49K
Me: Why on earth is there a lamb in my hotel room? Reception: Sir, I believe when you made your reservation you requested a mini-baa... #sillysaturday
1
0
13
