Just got booked for the Riyadh Fringe Festival! I can’t wait to do an hour on my personal trauma while some guy chases me with a bone saw

“If you can read this you are gay lmao” - bell hooks

Turns out the shooter is a straight white 22 year old male from a Republican family whose hobbies include online gaming and engraving the collected works of Audra Lorde onto ammunition

Ok so now where am I supposed to engrave my transgender ideology?

If he dies I’m flying back to NYC and getting holetox

To the tune of Eleanor Rigby Willoughby Tucker I’ll always love you is all Ethel wanted to say But now he’s fucking Lana Del Rey

Love to see Waymo’s getting burned in the LA protests like they were a bonus pickup

lol at least the world will end because of a guy who pisses himself got into a fight with a guy who shits himself

I saw COEXIST sticker on a cybertruck A little voice inside my head said what the fuck What the ever living fuck

I too am a trans woman with a shameful past history of deplorable tweets (about how much I enjoyed watching La La Land)

TikTok has completely ruined playing Yahtzee while enjoying some grapes

despite David Lynch being an unrepentant horndog everyone only has great things to say about him. He understood that an honorable horndog stays in his seat, pops out his eyeballs, and hits himself over the head with a mallet. they don't make them like that anymore.

Ok what happened to all the cloud seeding and Jewish space lasers? West LA sure could use them

Brutalist is really good if you can ignore the fact Adrian Brody sounds just like Nandor the Relentless

This means there’s a Waluigi Mangione who works in private equity

Truly a legendary surname

SO IF YOU CARE TO FIND ME LOOK TO THE WESTERN SKY

Do we think Neil deGrasse Tyson is more upset about the idea of “Defying Gravity” or the concept of “Holding Space”?

Finally we’re getting to farce

We can do this! Guys look, we survived 2016-2020. It’s gonna be just like that only probably a whole lot worse