Internet of Shit
@internetofshit
Followers
442,646
Following
243
Media
1,286
Statuses
7,355
screw it, put a chip in it. say hello: internetofshit @gmail .com
hot girl smarthome
Joined July 2015
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why the fuck doesn't it just close the door itself if it's so smart
Samsung’s new fridge will ping your phone if you leave the door open
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1) don't buy it
2) there is no 2
How to Prevent Your Alexa Device From Recording Your Private Conversations—
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humanity is doomed
i just had to download a software update for my shoes which are now getting a charge on their USB-C wireless charging mat
we’re living in the future!!! 🤯
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"the sneaker can’t be tightened or properly worn" because there's a bug in an update
what a time to be alive
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"how many servers could it take to turn on a light bulb lol"
Philips: hold my beer
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F u c k
T h I s
Wow! China Airport face recognition systems to help you check your flight status and find the way to your gate. Note I did not input anything, it accurately identified my full flight information from my face!
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hey so these things called keys are good and fast
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✔️ loses the data of hundreds of millions of people
✔️ ruins a few elections
✔️ data breach lets anyone into millions of people's accounts
✔️ still wants to put a online webcam in your kitchen
Today we're excited to introduce
@PortalFacebook
to everyone. Come say hi and check out to learn more.
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Hello verified users, you can't tweet, but you CAN retweet, so I'll help you out
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"I cancelled our printer subscription and it blocked me from using the rest of the ink in the cartridge"
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Every time Google goes down, a thousand nerds cry out, wishing they'd installed actual lightswitches
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Hi!
Just letting you know you can't use your lights anymore because we're slathering your data around and GDPR is here.
good luck! bye!
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99 smart phones in a pull-cart = instant traffic jam
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Fuck off
Amazon Key is a new service that lets couriers unlock your front door
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Oh it's just the terms of service of all the apps printed on the ground
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man the future is weird as hell
Rest in peace food delivery robot and who ever ordered their food
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wow, who could have seen that coming
San Diego police are reportedly tapping into "smart" streetlight footage to investigate protesters. The lights were originally pitched as a way to capture transit and enviro data, NOT as a way to jail residents.
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if your TV needs a virus scanner you fucked up pretty bad
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the moment you get vaccinated Zoom disappears from your computer forever, you're immune
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Apple: we're slowing down processors cause your battery might be bad
Intel:
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it took 1000s of years to get the amount of work to create light down to trivial amounts so everyone could use it
it took just 10 years to fuck it up and need a few megawatts of servers to turn one bulb on from the couch
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wait wait wait
i have to put my phone in flightmode when i fly
but the dude driving the plane is AIRDROPPING HIS PHOTOS TO ANOTHER PLANE?
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Ring just low-key revealed it's aggregating massive amounts of data from doorbells and doing whatever with it
Ring is thrilled about having filmed millions of small children on Halloween, according to its Instagram story
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i kid you not, my bank just called me to ask why i was getting a huge lump of money deposited at once (stickers, lol), and then went on to advise me that "maybe my business shouldn't have the word shit in it" 😂
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"but wait that would cost so much because you need a motor and stuff"
let me tell you about the cost of building an app and running servers: lol
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Cannot remove this baby
Baby tracking app design is really... something.
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?
Btw, critical feedback is always super appreciated, as well as ways to donate money that really make a difference (way harder than it seems)
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bugs, ranked
Heartbleed:
whoops, the internet is burning
Shellshock:
oh no, bash is broken sorry
Meltdown/spectre: we had a nuclear reactor accident twenty years ago and just found it uhhhh yeah good luck
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an internet connected drone camera for your home, owned by Amazon. this definitely won't be a privacy nightmare *at all*
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it is absolutely bananas to me that anyone would put a facebook product with a camera in it in their home
FB Portal is a killer product which doesn’t get the attention it deserves.
With Zoom integration, it’s going to be *so much* better than having a webcam.
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the year is 2020: our voice assistants only talk amongst themselves
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- apple quietly slows down 1-2 year old phones almost to 500mhz when the battery gets worse
- doesn't tell users
- gets caught red-handed
- says it's in our best interest
🙄
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Your friendly reminder to *not buy a Ring doorbell camera* even if it's on sale
This holiday season, remember that Amazon is the police.
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looking forward to yelling STOP, PLEASE STOP at all four corners of my smart kitchên
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sorry im late, my car had a 500 error.
Tesla servers throwing 500 errors. People unable to unlock their cars.
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The internet of things is just a tiny outdated linux computer in your lightbulbs
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sorry i was late for work………my shower was updating
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Bought a $400 DRM juicer?
Well, they’re shutting down. So now it’s a paperweight 😬
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If you can't tie your shoes because they got an update: you deserve this
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THE POWER OUTLET THAT LISTENS is not a selling point, it's terrifying
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My cat feeder has a service outage. Why did I do this to myself 🤦♀️
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Burger King made a commercial that intentionally sets off voice assistants. Oh lord. (via
@glowgow
)
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ah yes i am very glad we have this thing we definitely needed
Several states now offer electronic license plates. Here’s a sentence I never thought I’d say: This license plate is downloading an update.
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lol you don't own anything anymore
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This ferrari got bricked because someone tried to upgrade it underground....where there's no cell reception. DRM in cars rules.
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University couldn't figure out why network was slow... turns out it was being attacked by its own vending machines 😬
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Why does windows think that my wireless keyboard is a toaster?
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i want to know how this happened , glorious technology
imagine being the developer who has to wake up to this bug report
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these fuckers throwing the intern under the bus when their entire organization failed to have proper policies or review in place to catch them.
if the intern could make an innocent mistake like this, it is *the executives failure*
Current and former top executives at SolarWinds are blaming a company intern for a critical lapse in password security that apparently went undiagnosed for years.
The password in question, "solarwinds123," was discovered in 2019 on the public internet.
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as a pedestrian............how do i opt-out of someone beta testing this anywhere near me
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“Road is too steep to start the installation” is a brand new sentence
In ‘sentences that would make your nan’s head explode’: I can’t update my car because I live on a hill
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I AM EATING TOAST, LIKE THE OTHER HUMANS THAT I RESEMBLE
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just very normal that amazon continues to sell this smart pet feeder that requires an app that doesn't exist because the company went bankrupt a year ago
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why do ovens need a touchpad
Touchpad on our oven died and it was $400 just for the part to replace it. 😵
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Can't wait for robotic arms to come to the kitchen
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i promise you it's not.... more tech in cars... that'll make things safer for cyclists. it's:
a) cycling infrastructure
b) ....................fewer cars
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hahaahahahahahahahahahahahahaahahaahahhahaahahahahahahahahahahahahaahahaahah
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idk how this guy thinks the internet works but let me tell you: i have seen many giant websites shit the bed because some hard drive got full and nobody noticed lol
People are saying twitter is going to go down as if the way servers stay up is a bunch of infra engineers sitting in the back room pedaling stationary bikes to power the racks
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haven’t we suffered enough
NFTs will start cars, open houses, gate real world events, represent ownership contracts for million dollar real world assets,
The JPEG is a test whether you’re looking beyond surface level.
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wow who would have thought putting cars online was a really shit idea
More car hacking!
Earlier this year, we were able to remotely unlock, start, locate, flash, and honk any remotely connected Honda, Nissan, Infiniti, and Acura vehicles, completely unauthorized, knowing only the VIN number of the car.
Here's how we found it, and how it works:
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God i just love more ads in things I've paid for
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it's like my nightmares are turned into products
This self-driving garbage can remembers to take the trash to the curb for you
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amazon would like to hear what you're saying in the bathroom
Amazon has created a $55 soap dispenser that has WiFi to pair to an Alexa speaker. Why? To “automatically play songs, jokes, and more when you wash” 😂
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'who could have stopped this' wonder all of the people working at facebook who didn't stop this
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The future is…shit
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adobe sells yearly subscriptions under the guise that they're just normal month to month plans and goes for the jugular when you gotta cancel it's great 🥲
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not only does amazon echo keep audio recordings forever on their servers, they also:
☑️ sent a customer someone else's audio files in a GDPR request
☑️ pretended it didn't happen
☑️ ignored them trying to report it
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lightbulbs not working because US-EAST-1 is down
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internet.....connected.....wood
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Alternative title: Keurig has launched a $399 DRM coffee machine that won't let you use competitor's pods
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have you tried turning your house off and on again
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