Wanda Sykes
@iamwandasykes
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503
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10,175
Comic, producer, writer, stunt double, wife, mother, and know-it-all. Coming to a city near you...maybe. Check the website for tour dates.
Joined March 2011
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Dear NFL players, please go to Puerto Rico and kneel to trick
@realDonaldTrump
into focusing on what the fuck he should be focusing on.
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Ya know...at first I wanted a female President. Then I thought another black President would be good, but now I just want an American President.
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If you’re a Trump supporter and not a racist, you should find this upsetting. If it doesn’t upset you, then you’ve just gotta trust us on this one. You’re a racist.
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Biden feels at home speaking to the Black community. He made a joke. Comedy ain’t easy, but he didn’t say 2 go shoot Clorox in our tits. Now, I wouldn’t make a blanket statement to say that voting for Trump means you’re not Black. I would say that it means you’re not smart.
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Goodnight y’all. I gotta get up early to go down to the creek to look for my ballot.🙄
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Don’t fall for it! STAY HOME, STAY SAFE! Let them march, we voted! We WON!
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When Lunar New Year and the first day of Black History Month fall on the same day
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Ok, so I want us to really hit it out of the park. What’s the # we should trend tomorrow during President Obama’s commencement speech? We need one that will make the BABY have a major tantrum. Should we keep it simple with just,
#Obama
?
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Wow!
@realDonaldTrump
just blamed the victims for not having guns inside the temple. He’s gotta go!
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Oh! Hey Chachi. Apologies, I didn’t see you. I’ll keep it short. Joe Biden didn’t say, “Then you ain’t an ape.”
Well, let me get back to work...I hope you enjoy whatever it is that you do.
Hey
@iamwandasykes
why is it okay for
@JoeBiden
to say something clearly racist but
@therealroseanne
gets kicked off of her own show that YOU are a writer on, for making a mistake? Is it because you're a full of shit, hack liberal?
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So y’all had me trending this morning. Dat baby is cute! And daddy is working that hair out. She has the Wanda Sykes starter fro going on.
#DaddyDaughter
❤️
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BITCH PLEASE! You sorry ass father is the one who started the family separation. He abused children! And as for values...you and your whole awful family have none!
And one more thing...fuck you!
Thank you
@POTUS
for taking critical action ending family separation at our border. Congress must now act + find a lasting solution that is consistent with our shared values;the same values that so many come here seeking as they endeavor to create a better life for their families
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Sobbing, missing my grandmother. Yeah, it’s been 35yrs, but, she loved me.
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Ya know...I make an effort to not hate anyone, but that Jim Jordan sure does make it hard.
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I bet they asked Herschel Walker if he was ready to make his concession speech, and he said, “Yes, two hot dogs please.”
Congratulations
@ReverendWarnock
Thank you GA!🙌🏾
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From the jump, I knew Trump was going to be bad, but I NEVER EVER thought that it would be this bad. This shit is catastrophic. And let’s not get distracted, we’re in a pandemic. Trump has let over 100K Americans die from Covid 19. No testing. No tracing. No real plan.
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I just tried a keto friendly cereal. I think tomorrow I’ll just eat my cabinets.
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She’s wrong for calling Trump a motherf***er. He’s a “lying motherf***er.”
Rashida Tlaib on Trump: "We're going to impeach the Motherf***er"
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I can not wait to visit you in prison. ❤️
Over 90% approval rating for your all time favorite (I hope) President within the Republican Party and 52% overall. This despite all of the made up stories by the Fake News Media trying endlessly to make me look as bad and evil as possible. Look at the real villains please!
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Ok, did you assholes get together and ask, “How can we make this THE worst Black History Month ever? I mean let’s really fuck it up.”
Burberry Apologizes After Sending a Noose Hoodie Down the Runway
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I truly believe if cancer had been cured under Obama’s administration, the Republicans would’ve found a way to bring it back.
The EPA has approved dumping bee-killing pesticides across 16 million acres of land
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So, are we completely out of rubber bullets and tear gas?
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That was a nice sweet booing. It melted my heart. 🙌🏾
Trump at the court as crowd chants “vote him out” — it’s rare for this President to see his opposition this up-close and in-person
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Well, I didn’t get Covid last weekend🙏🏾, but I have one of the worst colds I’ve had in a very long time. I’m sticking with the masks.
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Tonight is so special, I’m gonna go put on my bra. @
@KamalaHarris
#MakingHerstory
#
#BidenHarris2020
#AKA1908
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This man was an immense talent who consistently spread joy. His instagram helped get me through the pandemic and I will miss his light dearly. Rest in peace Leslie.
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WTF? Problem, Blacks, especially Black men, are perceived as a menace. These men weren’t in a bank lobby waiting for a friend. They were in a damn Starbucks...THE “meet me” spot in America.
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🤦🏽♀️Y’all, Steve F’n Bannon is on my flight. I’m gonna double check that this plane stops in Albuquerque first before it continues on to hell.
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Great! Because we buy tickets based on who’s officiating that day.
Exclusive: Umpires are considering refusing to officiate matches involving Serena Williams over her behaviour at the US Open final
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I wish that all of the mothers of those kneeling NFL players would show up at the WH and ask Trump, "Who you calling a bitch?"
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Trump bails on the Town Hall debate with Biden because he didn’t want another ass whupping so NBC decides to air a special episode of, “The Apprentice.” ? Nah. I’m BLACKING OUT NBC and MSNBC today! This does not support democracy, this supports a sideshow.
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I think this is called a...”press briefing”? But don’t quote me!
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We’re fully vaccinated and now rejuvenated! Can’t wait to hug you! Please get the vaccine. Treat yourself!
#vaccinated
✅ IG
@iamalexsykes
(special shout-out to
@KizzyPhD
) Thank you science!
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So from the feedback I’m seeing, Trump deserves an ice cream tonight since he was so good at the funeral this morning. Folks, sitting still, is a low bar.🤦🏽♀️
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VOTE! It works! ✊🏾
Ella Jones wins election to become first black mayor of Ferguson, Missouri.
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No no no no no! You do not get to “choose” to hide under the rainbow! Kick rocks!
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And I would just like to add that like most women, we’re quick to apologize even when it’s uncalled for, but in this and similar situations, “I’m sorry,” is 99.9% to be interpreted as, “Muthafucka what did you just say to me?”
Trump to woman reporter: "She's shocked I picked her, she's in a state of shock”
Reporter: “I'm not, thank you Mr. President”
Trump: "I know you're not thinking, you never do”
Reporter: "I'm sorry?"
Trump: "Go ahead"
This is institutionalized misogyny.
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FINALLY!
@jack
told Trump to STFU! 🙌🏾
Can we put them on a family plan? Don Jr, Ivanka, Eric, Tiffany, Jared, you too Melania...Shut all of those scoundrels down!
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It’s time to call a muthafucker, a muthafucker. And yeah, I’m talking about that muthafucker!
#ImpeachTrump
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Cicely Tyson opened doors, broke through ceilings, and made pathways. We will be forever grateful.
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Can we not forget that the only reason why Trump nominated this beer loving judge is because in a law review article, Kavanaugh stated that Congress should exempt sitting Presidents from criminal indictment. Period.
#StopKavanaughNow
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I’m playing a drinking game, do a shot when they lie. Bad idea.
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Ya know…as voters,… we could just say we don’t want our politicians and federal judges dealing in the stock market. Periodt
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How many of y’all heard “bitch” at the end of her statement?
.
@DonaldJTrumpJr
, I've lived in Nevada for nearly 40 years... you've been here for 5 minutes. And you're only attacking me because – unlike
@DeanHeller
– I'll stand up to
@realDonaldTrump
when he's wrong for our state.
Next time, have the guts to @ me.
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I’m on the right.
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An impeached President is starting a war, while on vacation at his country club in Florida. I know. Sounds crazy, right? We need some “checks and balances” up in here.
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Watching “Elf” with my kids. It’s their first time. 🤗 🎄 ❤️💚
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Here’s the tweet. If you voted for Trump, there is a racist bone in your body. It might be in your pinky toe...but it’s there. Praying for you.🙏🏾❤️
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You are an asshole...and I do mean “just the hole.” You don’t deserve cheeks.
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My mother just called me to tell me to behave myself. 🙄
Don’t tell her I rolled my eyes!
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Has the Mitch McConnell, “You About to Lose Yo Job” jawn, dropped yet?
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I’m gonna need a fruit basket.
Megyn Kelly issued an apology in an email to colleagues for a controversial comment she made on her show Tuesday about blackface.
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Dear white people as we approach these summer months just know there isn’t a single Black person in the world who wants to hear “I’m almost as dark as you”
#wandawisdom
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Gonna keep dancing and Google translate the lyrics when she goes to sleep
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Prayers for the two LA deputies. 🙏🏾 And praying for justice for all.❤️
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Thank you for your service! 🙌🏾Hey!!!! 🇺🇸❤️
After serving 6 years in the Army — and 20 years in the Navy - this hero retires and she walked out like this.
I’m here for all of it.🌎❤️💥🇺🇸
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We’re gonna be alright. ❤️
#vote
#VoteBlueDownBallot
A wall of vets protecting the wall of moms is the America we want. ❤️
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Quick shoutout to everyone who touched their eyeballs taking out their contacts, to realize that they were already out.
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Some folks in my hood are going all out for Halloween, but the scariest decoration so far is the Trump/Pence lawn sign.
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I don’t know who needs to hear this, but this pandemic will be over one day, and you’ll have people in your home again...so, you might wanna pick that up.
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I'm really going to miss all of the texts that Paul would send throughout the day to wish me a happy birthday...it was usually someone getting a pie in the face. He asked for donations to go to
@SU2C
& dementia or Alzheimer related orgs.
Give what you can.
Rest in paradise.
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Yes, that face she is making is the, “You a lying muthafucka,” face.
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In remembrance of First Lady Rosalynn Carter, who brought compassion and advocacy to the forefront. A true inspiration and a woman of substance. Sending love to President Carter and their family. May she rest in peace.
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Hey
@realDonaldTrump
...what was that thing you said about you “never used those terms on anyone”....? Well, who is this asshole?👇🏽
"I have a golf pro who's mentally retarded—I mean he’s really not a smart guy" Donald Trump
Deplorable.
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Trump just RT the video from TX of his supporters running the
#BidenHarris
motorcade out of town, along w/ “I LOVE TEXAS!” Intimidation &
#votersuppression
is nothing new, but this is dangerous. We must
#vote
to honor those who fought & died for us to be able to cast that ballot
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Just sayin...
White Family Beats Down 2 Police Officers, Miraculously No One Gets Shot
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Are they gonna have time to tent the WH and fumigate before the Biden’s arrive? And sage it too!
#HeGone
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May God bless all of those Capitol police officers who were there Jan 6th.
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Say what now? Exactly what is “too far?” The rapist has to pay off the victim’s student loan? Girl bye.
NBC host Megyn Kelly: Obama ‘swung the pendulum too far’ in favor of college sexual assault victims
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Ok...so I think it’s time that we all should just head down to our local precincts and file a restraining order on this...this...help me Lord...uh this troubled individual. I don’t know about you, but I don’t want this fool anywhere near me. 🙏🏽
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🤣
@SpeakerRyan
After all of the awful shit
@realDonaldTrump
has done, and not a “peep” from you...How dare you ask
@RepMaxineWaters
to apologize for supporting us to speak out against hatred and discrimination? I literally want you to go bury your fucking head in the sand.
WATCH: Speaker Ryan calls for Rep. Waters to apologize for her comments calling for Trump admin. members to be confronted and heckled when in public: "There’s no place for this."
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Giiirrrrlllll...this is so my mood! I just can’t. I told Alex to only speak to me in French from now on.
I just wanna fight everybody. We gotta vote all the suckas out. All. Of. Them. Still wanna punch some folks in the face tho... like, in addition to voting
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How are you gonna deal with Mitch McConnell?
Me: “I’m gonna have my cousin Trey smack the sh- What happened to my mic?”
#DemDebate2020
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You. Are. Garbage.
Very sad that the FBI missed all of the many signals sent out by the Florida school shooter. This is not acceptable. They are spending too much time trying to prove Russian collusion with the Trump campaign - there is no collusion. Get back to the basics and make us all proud!
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Why am I still laughing at last night’s
@AbbottElemABC
when Ava asked for a chair…?😂😂😂
@janellejcomedy
@quintabrunson
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I am broken. Praying for his family. ❤️
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Hey
@realDonaldTrump
, we know how much you hate being a loser, because that’s what you are now, a loser, because you lost...so, I don’t think anyone would mind if you just left now. Why wait? They’re just gonna keep talking about you being a loser.🤷🏽♀️
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