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@hammerbeard

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266
Following
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956
Statuses
17K

if found please return to nearest dumpster #bemis #pugdadbod

united states of student loans
Joined April 2010
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@hammerbeard
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4 years
The Morgans
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@hammerbeard
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1 year
I'm sorry, America. I fucked up and didn't vote in 2020. But Cards Against Humanity paid me $0.33 to post this apology and make a voting plan, and now I'm a whole new person! Did you skip 2020? Get paid to apologize today at https://t.co/5peB3Op0zF #DonaldTrumpIsAHumanToilet
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cahsuesmusk.com
Elon Musk stole your land, and now he owes you $100.
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@hammerbeard
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1 year
Williams just hit them with the WNBA logo steal @seattlestorm
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@hammerbeard
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1 year
Woke up to a new @USPS Informed Delivery email template in my inbox and I love it. Am I old now?
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@hammerbeard
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1 year
This aged poorly.
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@hammerbeard
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2 years
I like reading The Phantom Tollbooth every year or so, and this time I revisited the story via @rainnwilson reading it to me via @audible_com. What a great way to travel along with Milo!!
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@BleacherReport
Bleacher Report
2 years
FRANCINE TAKES IT TO THE HOUSE 😂 The #PuppyBowl is electric Tune in NOW on @AnimalPlanet
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@hammerbeard
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2 years
Yay!!!!
@AnimalPlanet
Animal Planet
2 years
🗣️ FIRST TOUCHDOWN OF #PUPPYBOWL XX GOES TO TEAM FLUFF! Francine absolutely carrying the team on her back.
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@hammerbeard
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2 years
PSA: put your phone down
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@hammerbeard
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2 years
People who sleep with socks on are sociopaths
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@hammerbeard
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2 years
you failed me joseph
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@hammerbeard
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2 years
DODONGOOOOO
@pugbertofficial
Pugberto Dancing Multiverse
2 years
"Dinosaur Boss Battle" The Legend of Zelda: Ocarina of Time (1998)
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@hammerbeard
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2 years
a story of heartbreak: Dear @lushcosmetics, my Asteroid City shower gel arrived today. One bottle arrived fully alive, while the other left some goodness along the way. the end
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@hammerbeard
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2 years
just hit ep 52 of @dungeonsanddads, there have been many great references up to this point (notably-metal gear solid) but @HeyBethMay’s “Mr, Hammond, I think we’re back in business!” has me laughing like a goon
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@hammerbeard
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2 years
my absolute favorite thing to do (for whatever reason) is fall asleep to ESPN whenever I stay in a hotel room. @MarriottBonvoy, ur breaking my heart rn
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@hammerbeard
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2 years
thinking about all the @Neopets I left in the virtual abyss
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@hammerbeard
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2 years
just upgraded from my @nvidia 2060 Super to a 4060 Ti and I am ready to run through a wall #POWER
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@hammerbeard
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2 years
Tina Turner didn't want to deal with DeSantis.
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@hammerbeard
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2 years
I'm so excited
@Festival_Cannes
Festival de Cannes
2 years
✨ Montée des Marches de ASTEROID CITY de WES ANDERSON - ✨Red Steps of ASTEROID CITY by WES ANDERSON #Cannes2023 #Competition #SélectionOfficielle #OfficialSelection
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@hammerbeard
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3 years
watching the coronation rn and it’s super culty
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@hammerbeard
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3 years
kraken celebrating my 4 year journaling anniversary with a game seven win, nice
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