Godhammer
@godhammer
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Bestselling author, inventor of polar ice caps, former railroad tycoon, provincial deity, and master of lies.
The Cliffs of Insanity
Joined May 2008
Hmm, I peek in after a few months of Twitter sabbatical and the universe suggests I am doing something right... "You are blocked from following @therealroseanne and viewing @therealroseanne's Tweets. Learn more"
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TFW you wanted to get your vehicle back to stock, not the future. https://t.co/RpxQmdj7nM
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Also celebrating its 20th anniversary? This site. #AbideWithMe Uh, reposting, because: frameset! For all your Big Lebowski bowling supply needs!
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NFL & SEO—not quite dead yet, but many former champions are gone (or stuck in commentary). Good luck, godspeed, and coddle your knees.
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The halftime show has me far closer to trying detergents versus any ad. #TidePodChallenge #SuperBowl
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Pretty much what I did to my office after New Years.
Luckily for worried souls with nuclear disaster on the mind, there’s one thing the government figured out decades ago: In the event of a nuclear attack, what’s the best way to store your files?
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Godhammer, Himself, and 1 others hate a new #Feature from @twitter whereby you get a fluffing #Notification involving @people who are not interacting with @you in any damn way at all.
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I keep typing 2013 as the date. I have become my great grandmother.
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Tiger Woods has returned to clubbing, err, golf... because the competition in mistreating women is really intense right now.
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Character counter replacement Hot Take, Day 2—visual appearance suggests Mac OS is waiting... (for me to spend my time more wisely than looking at Twitter)? #StupidBlueCircle
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Everyone says Tom Hanks is this great actor, but he couldn't deliver a wooden performance in a stupid voiceover. #ToyStory
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"Because you booked an expensive flight, we know you'll open any email we send—wanna buy a timeshare? Purse dog? A baby?" #NotInTheItinerary
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PSA—whatever the reason, if I see #BettyWhite trending, please be advised I will be deleting my account and signing-out of Twitter for good.
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These days, whenever I see a washed-up #CelebrityNameHashtag I hope for everyone's sake they've snuffed it with their legacy intact. #sigh
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You say Extreme Vetting, I think about trying to smear triple antibiotic ointment on a blue whale cesarean in situ below a shrinking icecap.
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Come on @AmericanAir WTAF
So @AmericanAir just lost @VilissaThompson's wheelchair... shes stranded now. This is so effed up. (Please Retweet)
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#MakeAPlaySpooky A Weinstein in the Sun Arsenio and Old Lace Hamilton on Rye American Ruffalo A Straitjacket Named Desire Twelve Angry Hens
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