maybe: sasha
@goalietaps
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i support hockey players’ rights to hold hands // phi + njd + nsh + ott + everyone else // she/her // 27 // making hockey creative again one poem at a time
your guess is as good as mine
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if it’s an upper body injury, it’s a broken heart. if it’s a lower body injury, dick fell off. hope this helps!
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new york to philly express in 18 minutes i’d be heckling the flyers in person every single night
This would literally destroy the North American airline industry. Build the loop.
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mom is reading novels at the game because, quote, “it’s such a fun atmosphere! it’s the best place to read!”
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lucy holding the football vs charlie brown kicking it
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ummm hockey expert here. this is not funny, players only do this when they are in extreme distress. delete this.
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if the nhl doesn’t market sharks v kraken games as The Battle of the Deep what is even the point
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omggggg
why is jagr looking for the bobbleheads when he should be searching for catherine, princess of wales‼️
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i need him to be so successful i am Not Joking
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the thing american football does extremely right is have a little twink with a specialized skill they get to trot out at important moments so he can be hugged enthusiastically by his much larger teammates
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this is a cool stat
The 2024 Stanley Cup champion will be a team that’s waited at least 25 years 🤯👏
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oh is gabriel landeskog playing in the playoffs? i must have missed him scoring the first goal and getting the second highest amount of ice time last night
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“touch her and i’ll kill you” is only believable in hockey players if it’s a dman talking and the her is his goalie
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Hi Jesse! I'm Sasha, and that's me not hiding in my profile picture.
Hey Maya, unless you’re somehow Sarah Nurse, how about you use an actual photo of yourself before you talk shit online? Or maybe use your actual name? What are you hiding from?
So many of these ‘anti-Zionists’ spew hate online and hide behind fake photos and names. It’s
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dylan strome’s comments on his wife’s insta never disappoint
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"why are the pads on backwards" it's a metaphor it's subverting expectations it's showing how she set herself up to miss things she should've caught it's commentary on a woman's perceived place in sports it's going to make her nhl ex-boyfriend mad every time he sees the cover
Tate McRae announces her sophomore album, ‘Think Later.’
Out December 8.
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getting to my church in lower manhattan takes 45 minutes you don’t understand i’d be texting my friends in philly like “drinks tonite 👀?!” im so serious
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if girls aren’t supposed to watch hockey then why are the jonas brothers singing burning up live at the flyers-devils stadium series?
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this is the cutest shit i’ve ever seen
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of all the players to be in this situation i think alex lyon is one of the best choices
it’s gotta be so humbling to be a professional athlete and have kids just have absolutely no clue what that sport is 💀💀💀
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Would the Ottawa Senators post this? Would any men's team? Please focus on the sport and the professional athletes.
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someone get gary bettman on the phone we’re updating overtime rules now
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CONNOR BEDARD PULL A KEVIN HAYES (happy birthday) AND REFUSE TO SIGN WITH CHICAGO PLEASE PLEAAAASE
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didn’t target say the limit was two per person tho
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i want to start a podcast where i interview nhl players about anything but hockey and if they mention hockey i immediately end the discussion
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“vegas isn’t doing anything wrong by exploiting a loophole the other teams won’t use” okay but consider i am a hater and i don’t like them and everything they do is bad and evil
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i LOVE when one goalie decides to throw down the gloves with a skater and the other goalie comes flying down the ice like he’s unleashed
WE GOT A LINE BRAWL IN CHICAGO AND THE GOALIES WANTED TO GO 😱🥊
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you know matthew laughing made him even madder
brady being genuinely upset while matthew is very obviously resisting the urge to laugh at him is peak sibling behavior
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i actually think it should be illegal for fiancés to play each other for the stanley cup
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when athletes touch their helmets together to me that is a kiss
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it’s the best time of the year and for the third time in a row, it’s a bandwagon thread! if your team is knocked out of the playoffs and you want another to support here’s a tiny little primer to help you understand the vibes.
THE 2024 STANLEY CUP TEAMS ARE:
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the one where he’s in jail ☺️
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we must stop the epidemic of hockey romance authors who think players get drafted to the nhl after college
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sometimes you pay $25 to hang out with your friends at a concert and mumble the words to the one song you know, and walk out with the soundtrack to the next three months of your life
You should not be going to an artists concert if you only know their hit songs.
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keefe:
Marner and Tavares dealing with more “flu-like” illness, per Keefe. Not believed to be related to Timmins’ mono. A couple other Leafs were also feeling sick but played anyway because Toronto didn’t want to dress a short bench.
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luke prokop didn’t even get a chance to wear an nhl pride jersey 😔
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🫡🫡
can someone edit the "welcome back x" meme but it says [picture of nolan patrick] traded in 2021 then [picture of jamie drysdale] acquired in 2024 then "welcome back princess diana"
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@spelunky_
also the first time the tkachuks played each other family friend wes mccauley was ref’ing and he threw people out until matthew and brady were in the circle together for the picture
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twelve year olds girls with crushes is sincerely how we grow the game
there’s a group of tween girls here SCREAMING constantly for jack hughes w the biggest of signs and he even started laughing about it bc oh my goddd are they enthusiastic
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i would pay to be on twitter if this ever happened in real life like the tweets would be absolutely next level
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if wearing a pride jersey is grounds for treason for certain players then wearing a military jersey is most definitely so, and yet those warmups are not being cancelled league-wide 🤷🏼♀️
The NHL's Russia-Pride jersey problem, explained: Why
#mnwild
became latest to scrap plans
By
@JoeSmithNHL
, me and a number of others
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scrolled by too fast and wondered why mitch marner was at the met gala
Once again Kristen Stewart is the Timothee Chalamet you've been waiting for
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john gibson on the bench for the anaheim ducks next year:
sorry i get it but this is so funny what if they dont trade him is he just gonna refuse to go on the ice, will he sit in the locker room with his arms crossed
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chantal tkachuk thanking the hockey gods this happened after family thanksgiving rn
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it should be an nhl rule that the tkachuks have to be mic’d up if they’re playing each other
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my official stance on booktok is that it’s very funny to watch them completely misunderstand how hockey works
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having a child and taking pictures of them in all 32 teams’ gear so twitter users can scream about how it was fate they got drafted by their team if they make the nhl
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cole sillinger cant do center for the blue jackets either apparently
tate mcrae could play center for the blue jackets but cole sillinger couldn’t do greedy
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two of the greatest hockey players of all time and a fan (center)
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if i was cutter gauthier i’d tweet “who the fuck is john tortorella” and turn off my phone
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this should not have been a penalty because it’s extremely funny
Someone threw a chicken nugget onto the ice at an ECHL game and Kirill Tyutyayev got handed a 10 minute misconduct for throwing it back into the crowd!😬
🎥:
@SportsiCohn
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pulled out of a romance novel because a character was described as “a huge six foot hockey player” and i went “huh that’s actually a little small for the sport”
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i’ve missed this**
**having a mental breakdown while hockey plays in the background
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only connor would get engaged in sunglasses but DAMN that is a ROCK
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andre burakovsky used to follow all members of one direction on instagram but niall horan posted about going to a kings-caps game where he rooted for the kings and burky unfollowed him
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oh to be a tiny baby in a wee jersey and noise cancelling headphones asleep at my dad’s hockey game while he stares at me from behind the glass before playing
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Fear Him.
“Nobody players defense like Cale Makar, he hurts people” *pans to a literal cherub*
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it’s so good to see the captain of the team with the only openly gay prospect speak in favour of pride night 🫶🏼 it matters!!
Roman Josi on Pride Night:
“It’s kind of disappointing we can’t wear the jerseys, but it’s an important night for us. Hopefully we can make everyone feel as included as possible tonight.”
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obviously
Serious question… who’s gonna beat this team in the playoffs?
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remember when eric staal tried to gaslight the entire world into thinking he had never worn a pride jersey despite literal pictures of him in them on pride night in montreal
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does this mean taylor swift knows who quinn hughes is
@NflLover69
Played until I was 15… 90’s hockey was my entire world. Pavel Bure was probably my favorite Canuck back then.
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ding dong
WAS ANYONE GOING TO TELL ME THAT JAMIE DRYSDALE’S BIRTHDAY IS ALSO THE DAY MARGARET THATCHER DIED
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in honor of his 1000th game i’d like to remind everyone that marc-andre fleury had fifty penalty minutes in fifty five games his second year of juniors
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ohhh they’re absolutely going to rig the vote so luke hughes is in the allstars and make a big deal out of the three brothers aren’t they
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i need hockey back i need to be able to put my brain on pause while watching athletes in prime condition crash into each other
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men just don’t kiss at center ice like they used to anymore we used to be a country a proper country
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women in the pwhl will have graduate degrees in civil engineering and work as a doctor slash lawyer slash ceo on the side
men in the echl will have graduated with four point oh gpas in like mathematics meanwhile we are still debating whether or not the majority of nhl players can read
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i think this might be the best apology i’ve ever seen come from someone involved in hockey. good for him.
Jon Cooper opened his end of season media availability by apologizing for the "emotional, quite frankly dumb words that came out of my mouth the other night. For that, I'm sorry."
Coopper said, "As you know, it was a pretty disappointing series loss the other night. I made an
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the reason they didn’t full on kiss on the mouth with tongue is bc linus’ mask was in the way but that’s the only reason
Jeremy Swayman was HYPED for Linus Ullmark's goal.
Bruins are 45-8-5.
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hey WHAT did i miss
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ivan provorov i hope your chain breaks and you lose your cross and you can’t get another one blessed by a priest by the volga. i hope every candle you light goes out. i hope every time you see an icon of jesus you are inexplicably guilty. i hope you change your mind one day.
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underrated aesthetic: moms of ppl who very suddenly and unexpectedly got very into hockey recently and they don't quite get it but they're doing their best to be supportive
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connor bedard saying he’s never eaten mcdonald’s literally cannot be true as anyone on a high school sports team in north america can attest
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