Fred Hogge
@fredhogge
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Typist & martini mixer, writing about ice. I think I own a dog but I realise it's the other way around.
London
Joined March 2009
I love an egg, I really do. But there are some mornings when they just sit on the plate and look at you funny.
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Sorry for being a bit slow to this one, but Hurricane Eta? Are they naming the damned things after terrorist organisations now? Will it be Hurricane Farc next?
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One fo you @taniakindersley
What IS the braking distance of an unladen but furious tiny pony on wet concrete at 30MPH, I hear you cry?
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Okay, so here's as question for the ages: why is it that the eyebrows hairs that've turned white INSIST on growing straight out from the face instead of following the rest of the eyebrow in its predesignated direction? Answers on a postcard to W12 8QT.
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TFH mainstay @Karaszewski has been honored with a @Criterion list of feature recommendations (plus one short). Check these out... Larry never steers you wrong! https://t.co/Ac3vzPimhD
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Actually, toast and peanut butter would be pretty good right about now.
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I do however have a bag of dog treats and a monster bottle of @TABASCO with @kplunketthogge's name on it. I worry that they're beginning to look a little tempting.
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I could really murder another piece of cake right about now, but I have eaten all the cake. Apart from the fact that I am now about 40% cake, there is no more cake. Which really rather takes the biscuit. There are also no biscuits.
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Oh fuckety-balls, I JUST WANT TO SLEEP DAMMIT!!!! And I want to get out of this bloody room and do something. Anything. ARGH!!!!!!!!!!! I would also give my left nut for a decent cup of coffee in the morning and a dry martini come 6pm. It's official. I have gone stir-crazy.
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It's official: @kplunketthogge is out of quarantine. The lucky bastard.
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Congratulations @BBCRosAtkins for keeping a straight face and that final line though ....... 👏🏻
The story of Four Seasons Total Landscaping - with thanks @jeremyrroebuck and colleagues at @PhillyInquirer, plus @washingtonpost. And @_RichardHall who was there.
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What on earth is @kplunketthogge making @joefattorini eat at this Thai food market? 🇹🇭 Watch Ep. 3 of @wineshowtv in Thailand on @PrimeVideo NOW! https://t.co/9UjV9l8ubQ
#wineshowseriesthree #visitportugal #portanddourowines #amazingthailand #newseries
@Tatnews_Org
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To quote his owner: this is a big fucking deal #rescuedogs
Let us focus on a big historic first, people: The first rescue dog is going to take up residence at 1600 Pennsylvania Avenue!
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Crikey! Ollie Watkins's first goal! What a joy to behold @AVFCOfficial #utv
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Trump's hair has left the White House
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Watch Kamala Harris, the first woman, first Black person, and first South Asian person elected vice president in US history, thank the women who have paved the way for her.
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Now, if we could just see the orange faced cunt end up in orange, that'd be a lovely cherry on top.
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