HEY IT’S ZINE CLUB! I make a monthlyish zine where I write jokes/draw pictures/talk about depression, and about once a month I put it all on paper and mail it to your house https://t.co/syw5Tlq81z

[Chewing on a free loaf of bread] How could this day get any better? [Someone hands me a ticket to the circus] Wow. I’ll never revolt

like there’s nothing better than a hyperspecific, high-effort joke that will absolutely murder no more twelve people on the planet

I've got "Tokyo Convertible" stuck in my head yet again. SLUMBER PARTY MASSACRE II soundtrack on vinyl, when?

https://t.co/0h1xtADDXP

I recreated "Nookie" as a KK Slider (of Animal Crossing New Horizons) song, complete with album art https://t.co/N1NF2WRgmf

this is true of any historic moment you fancy, by the way what you would have done then, is what you are doing now

apropos of nothing, if you've ever looked back at 1930's Germany and wondered, "what would I have done?" It's what you're doing now.

I hate gay new year's, what do you mean you're going as luigi mangione's mugthot

if your Christmas carol can’t leave me shaking and sobbing, I’m not interested

@kayxstars @foundbysara when i hear "fall on your knees" i want to feel my soul exit my body. i want the song to force me to my knees. i want to leave saying three our fathers and a hail mary

please don't call it that

when I mention Arby’s, you’re likely already picturing a specific location maybe one down the street, or that you went to growing up, maybe it’s not even there anymore this is your “Mind Arby’s” and with training you can go to this Arby’s at any time and from any place

wtf

Disappointing so far

i am so warm and affectionate and playful that i cannot help but exude dead wife montage energy. sorry if this is distressing

im going to make you suffer until you beg for mercy and then i'm going to put another coat on you and another coat on you and then another

all my clothing recommendations are intentionally uncomfortable bc men should always and continuously suffer