https://t.co/4GIFOjSjrq

Why Did the Democratic South Become Republican?

Carson King raises over a million dollars for the children’s hospital and a @DMRegister reporter repays him by digging through his tweets to 2011 when he was 16 and quoting Tosh.O to imply he’s racist. This is why we can’t have nice things.

Pulling up to drive-through window, girl starts to read back my order and stops herself: “you’re Tony Hawk?” me: yes her: “can I tell everyone?” me: I suppose her: “yo, we got Tony Hawk at the window!” voice from kitchen: “Who?”

Mitch McConnell Feeling Emasculated By Wife Who Makes More Illicit Money Than Him https://t.co/jOKQQAjSlD

Buckingham Palace Guards Impressed By First Lady’s Ability To Never Crack Smile https://t.co/J8to7wooUm

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ESPN pulls asian sportscaster off college football game because his name is Robert Lee Their gonads have shrunk to the size of english peas