Hi @tesco, because you’ve hidden or canned all your customer support email, I’m having to tell you here there was a huge chunk of plastic in your falafel. I don’t monitor this neonazi website, so you can find my email address on the site linked in my profile.

Hi @ThreeUK , I've raised an issue with OFCOM because you keep spamming junk SMS at me, despite your staff saying it would stop 12 months ago. You use the same number to send bills from, so I can't just block it, you cretins.

Britain faces a simple and inescapable choice - stability and strong Government with me, or chaos with Ed Miliband:

Just when I thought asshole owned platforms couldn't possibly get any worse, YouTube has just said 'Video playback will be blocked until YouTube is allowlisted' Allowlisted? It's not the horrific ecosystem they have created, but the languagewordcrimeification

Can’t believe today is the day @rishisunak has chosen to announce cancelling Crossrail here in Euston, but he’s right, he’s going to send £6,000,000 a week to the NHS instead, it’s absolutely what 100% of the people who voted for him want

Just want to thank, once again, the UK pharmaceutical industry for making things needlessly un-vegan. Lactose as a *sweetener* is an exciting new development for me. If only there were other substances that were sweet, cheap and grew in soil. I guess we'll never know.

It's Just Grate we have new defence ministers in the shape of @grantshapps, Michael Green, Corinne Stockheath and Sebastian Fox† . A cabinet of the most talented and of SEO scammers, well done @RishiSunak our latest PM without popular mandate †

How come 99.75% of the DNA in your body does not belong to you? Why does the Large Hadron Collider expand by 1mm twice a day? This week, I’m giving away another audiobook of THE ONE THING YOU NEED TO KNOW to a randomly chosen person who retweets this @OMaraBooks

🐸It's Robo Bingo final preview tonight @kingssalford Mon 31st - starts 7.30pm with @mollmcguinness opening! All our bingo work so far refined into a chaotic molten core.

I’m so bored of hearing serial liar Nigel Farage whining about NatWest asserting their sovereignty and voting for his account to leave

👁️👃👁️ Mr bing has sent this from the ferry Our show Robo Bingo is happening around the country and at @edfringe 16th July Sheffield @square_hole (full new bingo) 31st July @kingssalford (edinburgh preview) 3-27 Aug Edinburgh fringe @FollowTheCow

Okay, spread the word: Let's all stand outside at 7pm on Thursday and clap and bang pans to show our support for Thames Water #saveourprivatisedpublicutilities much better than a bail-out

Great to see the tories finally experience austerity (of councillors)

Tonight 283 Conservative MPs voted to BLOCK the Sewage Discharge Bill, which would have cracked down on polluting water companies. 🟦 This is a new low for Conservative MPs who simply don’t care about the sewage crisis. ❌🦦 Can you spot your MP on the list?🔍⬇️

How odd I don’t get emergency alerts on @ThreeUK and yet they somehow keep sending me marketing SMS on a number I have repeatedly opted out of marketing on #priorities

HELP ELON!!ELON!! HELP! HELP! POST "DOG COIN"

Is musk a thin-skinned brat who hoarded the toys without thinking and can’t bear dissent, or not?

I wish the hack Amazon best-selling ebook author and retweeter of banned far-right group’s videos would stick to her literary job and keep her nepotistic nose out of politics

Matt Hancock admits in this message to Simon Case that he helped cover up rising cases in key areas during Eat Out to Help Out. Strikes me as potentially the biggest revelation yet…

Excited for the next season of Brexit NI deal, coming Jan 2024