will muldoon
@WillMuldoon
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data nerd, probably real. will @willmuldoon .com
Juneau, AK
Joined April 2014
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Do you think the ocean at night is spooky to whales? Just cruising through the void like that. Damn.
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According to the official AK voter rolls, there are actually *nine* official genders in Alaska:
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@carrieuga
What's great about the Nulls is that their data is off by one column...
But then if we shift it over one...those 3 Nulls become:
• 1 man
• 1 woman
• 1 "CANADA"
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Oh man. I am dying at this.
According to
@CillizzaCNN
,
Alaska Purchase: NOT WORKING OUT.
Pack it up guys, party is over.
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@taylor_vandoren
@WryCritic
Them and the 76120s are really having their moment tonight and I'm here for it!
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Alaska. Now a country.
This is a great map by
@artlebedev
studio. All the countries scaled and shaped correctly. I thought of doing this but wouldn't have done it this well!
#dataviz
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@arne_d_h
@WryCritic
I haven't traced, but this close.
I believe the misparse was with overseas voters that shifted all previous columns rightwards one column.
We have cols for mailing and residence and overseas sometimes doesn't fit schema or wasn't escaped properly is my assumption.
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He settled today and paid out $2m.
The Trump Foundation should also be cleared to proceed in it's dissolution now that its legal woes are resolved.
What's also WILD: David Fahrenthold from WaPo won the Pulitzer for his work reporting on this. In the year 2017, 85 years ago.
The sleazy New York Democrats, and their now disgraced (and run out of town) A.G. Eric Schneiderman, are doing everything they can to sue me on a foundation that took in $18,800,000 and gave out to charity more money than it took in, $19,200,000. I won’t settle this case!...
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LYDIA JACOBY IS AN ALASKAN GOLD MEDALIST!!!!
- Me, drunk off white zin spritz, explaining why the pools need an additional $10M next spring.
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An underrated part of living in Alaska is how disorienting naps are.
Why is it dark? What day is it?
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Alaskan Political discourse got you down?
Check out this campaign ad my niece produced completely on her own without telling anyone. It's the sweetest thing happening rn.
(Paid for by Will Muldoon for School Board)
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Best news this week?
Adoption papers went thru.
Lets. Get. This. GARBAGE.
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The Lamestream Media wont tell you this!
I was going over the data for
@PepitoTheCat
and it isn't lining up. This cat is clearly getting help to circumvent the system. Fraud! especially late at night!
Massive amounts of evidence will be presented on the 6th. We won, BIG!
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My back deck right now. No filter.
"This sucks." - Chris Cillizza.
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Someone in Kusilvak earns about 31% of someone in Juneau, yet their cost for a gallon of milk is 3.25x what it is in Juneau. Applying a statewide sales tax would be a hardship for some and barely noticeable for others.
#akleg
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The amount the governor will withhold weekly from Alaskans out of work is equivalent to the amount of money the governor will give fifty seven legislators daily for refusing to work.
It's grotesque, and I would love to read a PDF from each recipient on the rationale.
#akleg
You HAVE GOT TO BE FUCKING KIDDING ME!
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People have donated almost $14k to restore the into the wild bus.
I have an outstanding record request bill for $750 if we're just burning money on shit no one understands disguised as one man's pursuit of happiness.
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Did the school district just post a picture of my Dunks and colorbloxk to match?!
As if I wasn't already looking fwd to the next 36mos. 💛
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Thankful for friends who are always around to provide levity and context.
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A porcupine rolled up to my friends house, cleaned out the dogs water dish and then cozied up for a nap and a movie and I've never been more jealous of anything in my life.
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America: I'd kill for 75°F/50% humidity.
Juneau at 75°F/50% humidity: kill me.
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I got appointed to the Disability Law Center of Alaska Board of Directors tonight.
🥳
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The lower 48 Journos are in town for their Sarah vs Santa quotes. Be safe friends.
Remember, the correct answer is: "This is a wonderful opportunity to see how Alaskans respond to RCV. But what id really like to remark on today is my love for our schools, pools, and parks."
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I am not safe from Anchorage earthquake tweets.
No one is.
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Anchorage:
Covid numbers decreasing.
Week break from marathon assembly sessions.
No earthquakes.
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I don't want a pat on the head for coming in to work.
I want every single person able to work from home to be directed to do so from their supervisor.
Folksy slogans about how Hardy Alaskans are don't pay my fucking bills.
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Today's adults are awesome as well.
I don't have the words to describe my gratitude. But, thank you. For everything.
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Apparently if you witness some criming and then chill in department of law's waiting room and then maybe give a lil testimony in a proceeding, you are handsomely rewarded.
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71.39% of the eligible population of Juneau has received at least one dose of the covid vaccine.
🙌
Shouts to DHSS on the new covid dashboard.
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I wanna live somewhere that calls press conferences to call conspiracy theorists batshit crazy.
Australian police addressing anti-vaxxers, anti-maskers and 5G conspiracies in a VERY Australian way.
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Heres the Trump/Macron handshake from today.
Trump looks like hes throwing up gangsigns. 😂😂😂
PS: This isnt normal and we're all gunna die.
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I got a call this afternoon that someone wants to use some of my tweets/data as part of a court case.
This might become a weird hotdog account for a few days to give the paralegals some fun.
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🙄
@lisamurkowski
is the correct answer. She dunked 2010.
Lost a primary and party support. Won in a state without a partisan majority on a write in campaign with a 9 letter last name.
Retained cmte spots and independent streak. Leveraged both to see no real 2016 challengers.
The biggest political upset winners of the decade:
Scott Brown
Joe Walsh
Doug Jones
Dave Brat
Alexandria Ocasio-Cortez
Matt Bevin (the 2015 version)
...and a few more on our end-of-year list. Who’d I miss?
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This week is the anniversary of both when I got Leo, and when he died.
So many great days chasing mountains and marmots with this champion.
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🧐
For the sake of our children and our country, we must stop these mass shootings.
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Shouts to everyone who gave testimony in
#akleg
HHSS cmte.
You helped me get the antivax stragglers in my family vaccinated. I think the idea of shared responsibility weighed with risk/reward is what did it.
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@Michael_Stahler
@WryCritic
Happy for all the lil Italys finding themselves tonight. They deserve happiness and recognition.
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Most Alaskans don't belong to the 2 parties. It's a tough concept for lower 48 partisans.
We also have regional variance in the parties. A Bush Dem has more in common with a SE GOP than the SE GOP does with a valley GOP.
We can prioritize our future and our candidates. We good.
Alaska has the most messed up electoral process in the US.
It's like going to a restaurant, then pick your 3 favorite entrees, if you can't get what you want, there's alternatives:
1: Steak.
2: Grilled muskrat with anchovy marinade.
3: Seagull with boiled squash and bologna.
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Foster child doesn't like the foster care system, goes to law school and wins seat to legislature and makes signature issue foster care reform and empowering foster children. He gets it past the Senate in time!
@RepLesGara
is now elevated to Disney movie status. Congrats Les!
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There are now paid ads mischaracterizing my statements and urging against my reelection (which would be 33 months from now, if I even make that decision.)
This rules. May need to switch to New Balance to support my NB homies even more.
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Much thanks to The Alaska Watchman for calling me radical, but I haven't landed a kickflip in like ten years.
Juneau Schools push extreme elements of the LGBTQ agenda. Last year, the district published a guide for middle schoolers, telling them how to change their names/pronouns and encouraging them to use bathrooms of the opposite sex if that’s how they identify.
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I'd like to submit my qualifications for Anchorage Librarian, please and thank you.
I look forward to a quick confirmation.
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The rivers flowing down from Denali in a Charizard color palette.
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Anchorage would buy Lisa Frank Earthquake themed school supplies if they made them.
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Yo how THE FUCK did the crackheads steal my driver side door?!
A: it's a 96
B: what?
C: I'm fucking tired man. I don't wanna deal with this.
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Someone just called me and said "when i dial this number, why does it connect to you?"
What do I do w/ that? How is anything even anything in this mixed up world? How come when I push "6" on the elevator panel I don't go to Narnia?
No one knows buddy, crazy world out there.
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Blessed to have two men explaining abortion to me with thirteen mins left in session.
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They're targeting a "market rate" of $1925/mo for a 1bdrm.
Corporate landlords require your net to be >3x rent.
A single, no-dependent tax filer would need to gross $88,227.48/yr.
Or, $200 less than the median *household income*.
It's 205% of the median individual income.
According to Joseph Meyers, the city’s housing and land use specialist, it’s important for the city to try to meet all housing needs. And in Juneau, that includes market-rate options.
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Swim lessons were 100% booked +2minutes after the books opened.
...are they held in a USFS cabin?!
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How in the actual fuck are there tourists in town?!
There's entirely too much Arc'teryx and La Sportiva gear at sea level for this to be locals.
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Anchorage *is* a walkable city, even during snowpacalypse.
There's tacos and beer across the street. I'm thriving.
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Got appointed to the Alaska Bar Association Discipline Cmte for the 1st judicial district.
🥳
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Was named secretary of the disability law center and got to process $50M of payments to Alaskans today.
Pretty baller Friday so far...
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Six degrees of separation, Juneau Pel Meni edition:
• Kevin Bacon was in Animal House with John Belushi
• Belushi was on SNL with Chevy
• Chevy is Ted Danson's 9th cousin
• I had drinks with Ted Danson at the hangar and then the Alaskan.
• I worked at Pel Meni
• Pel Meni.
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Juneau is recommending an evacuation of the Behrends avalanche zone. Shelter is being spun up at centennial.
Please be safe Juneau.
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I was telling my sister how we'll have a table setup at public market for the school board (I'm there Sat/Sun.) but my mom missed the "for the school board" part and thought I was just going to centennial and setting up a booth alone so people can ask me random questions.
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Thought I still had a constitutional right to privacy in this state tbh.
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LMAO.
We ride at dawn. Absolutely coming for those records.
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Alaska Dept of Elections: Heres a fun way to learn ranked choice voting!
Alaskans: I will sue you through my Attorney Joe Geldhof, under the Alaska Public Records Act and the precedent set by Pruitt et al v state to get to the bottom of this Pollock controversy.
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My mom got me a wheel of white cheddar cougar gold for surviving these past three months.
Kicking off with a sundried tomato, caramelized onion, cougar cheddar stuffed focaccia to celebrate the impending gout.
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Got elected to the school board, processed the PFD for 735k of my closest friends, landed on the finance and facilities cmtes as a freshman AND scored Ms. Hughes-Skandijs, Ms. Triem and Mayor Weldon as my assembly liaisons and cmte persons.
Getting those W's my dudes.
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Lotta folks are saying "Who is ANWAR"?
Anwar El Sadat was the 3rd President of Egypt, from 1970 until 1981...when apparently then 24yo future Senator Lisa Murkowski lost him.
Sources close to the Senator are saying "I don't know wtf any of this means."
President Donald Trump has issued a "Complete and Total Endorsement" of Gov. Mike Dunleavy, except that it's completely and totally contingent on Dunleavy not endorsing Sen. Lisa Murkowski.
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This biggest discussion topic facing my city is whether a 2% savings draw is okay right now.
The biggest issue facing my state is whether we can afford $3k dividends and no taxes and full services with our $65B fund.
"Totally a folly" -Chris is a lizard.
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I love the cruiseships in town. Just a beautiful human zoo of majestic beasts.
Old folks horfing weed pens, middle aged bros with the new balances and trekking poles.
Art.
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Senate President Micciche left his truck running in a loading zone for one hour for each passed bill while grabbing drinks with Costello.
Day 108 of the most expensive and least productive session (yet!)
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I bumped into Ted (he was alone upstairs hangar, I was too, eating in booth) in JNU and said "hey, you Ted Danson?", he responded "I used to be!", so I intro'd myself and left.
Next night:
TD: "hey are you will muldoon?"
WM: "I used to be!"
He laughed then paid my tab.
@Nat_Herz
Danson is fairly invested in the work of Oceana which has a regional office here in Juneau.
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@xingcat
@MavenofHonor
I Saw him in Alaska and asked "Are you Ted Danson?" and he answered "I used to be."
I was starstruck and just responded "I'm Will Muldoon" and the next night I run into TED DANSON and he asked if I was Will Muldoon, I responded "I used to be." He bought my drinks.
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Submitting the final audit report for the AK State Employees Association Local 52 🙌
Happy to report that union dollars are being ethically used by a competent group of fiscally responsible coworkers and community members.
Shouts to my fellow ASEA trustees for all their work.
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Took <60hrs for Anchorage Earthquake Twitter's triumphant return. I don't understand why the northerners just don't live in bouncy houses at this point.
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What dense 700-page Pulitzer Prize-winning history book should Chris Nolan adapt for film next?
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Just got carded...on Will Muldoon Memorial Highway. What the hell is going on in this town?!
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lmao.
Teachers: The BSA has been flat forever and the Tier IV with no SS benefits is trash. This is on the legislature and the state.
The legislature and the state: We will spend $300k/yr for someone to babybird us our own reports, but in the meantime:
One study estimates Alaska spends $20 million on teacher turnover each year.
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The first Juneau telephone book, January 1895.
Sixteen numbers. hellos were answered at "a surprising rate".
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