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Talking way too much about writing, technology, and video games. (he/they) ❤️ @Simon1844 Avatar by ➡️ @teknopathetico
Joined April 2020
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it’s all those Shiver simps in Japan!! it’s all their fau—
wait…
[Splatoon 3]
Team Handshake (overseas) and Team Oban-yaki (Japan) win!!
Here's how many Super Sea Snails you get for each title:
Fan - 2 snails (+1 win bonus)
Fiend - 3 snails (+2)
Defender - 7 snails (+2)
Champion - 13 snails (+3)
Ruler and above - 21 snails (+3)
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there is something ironic about a team of racists being replaced with a team that has a Black inkling on it
[Splatoon 3]
In 9.0.0, Nintendo removed Jackpot's player characters from the World Championship banner.
It now matches the sample design (shown below), which depicts Stephanie, AnemoneNo1, YARRwhal, and VeronIKA. These are Nintendo-made characters used in promotional material.
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so I've seen a bunch of people ask: "why did Nintendo take so long to remove Jackpot?"
probably because they took the time to:
- conduct an investigation (aka ensuring the accusations were legitimate)
- coordinate an action plan with the Japan HQ
- consult their lawyers
- etc
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Nintendo's Japanese HQ: MAJOR ANNOUNCEMENT! GRAND FESTIVAL! NEW AMIIBO! NEW MERCH!
Nintendo of America: 😴
Nintendo of Europe: 😴
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this is honestly the funniest outcome
- first regional Splatfests, people rejoice because they think Japan is skewing the results in favor of Shiver
- at the Sneek Peek and Halftime, Frye is leading
- Shiver wins in all regions except Japan
- Frye wins in Japan
BEAUTIFUL
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honestly I'm just impressed at how many jellyfish Nintendo managed to put on the screen at once
*and* they all follow a unique bounce/cheer/wave/sway pattern for each song and are synchronized to the beat
really helps sell the "live concert audience" effect
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Nintendo try to make balanced teams challenge (IMPOSSIBLE)
this type of lopsided popularity fucks with matchmaking (mirror hell) and can make some people feel like they're wasting their time (no Clout for mirrors)
how have they done this so many times in 3???
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imo, the 1 million drop in players was caused by a triple whammy of:
- the game naturally losing players over time as the casuals get bored
- Tears of the Kingdom stealing a lot of players, both casual and hardcore
- no new King Salmonid
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wonder if Nintendo should return losing animations in Splatoon
from a player psychology standpoint, it seems a bit unnecessary to make the losing team watch the winners do their victory emotes
hell, could even just immediately go back to the lobby to speed things up
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judging by my spreadsheet, if we keep collecting Golden Eggs at this rate we'll easily hit the quota in the first day
700 million eggs at 3 pm UTC
800 million eggs at 5 pm UTC
900 million eggs at 7 pm UTC
1 billion eggs at 9 pm UTC
total of ~2.3 billion eggs by the end
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Nintendo really needs to choose better themes
the fact that Bigfoot was only voted for by ~8.69% of players(!!!!) definitely contributed to the hellhole that was mirror Tricolor for Nessie and Aliens
Here’s the full results! They’re also available at .
(Team Bigfoot’s popularity is NOT a typo. That team was really chosen by just 8.69% of players.)
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I highly doubt mirror matches affected the results in any significant way
what they *do* affect is player psychology - they make people feel like their time is being wasted
N needs to pick themes with more balanced popularity, but they can't seem to figure this out
[Splatoon 3]
Team Friday (overseas) and Team Whip (Japan) win!
Here's how many Super Sea Snails you get for each title:
Fan - 2 snails (+1 win bonus)
Fiend - 3 snails (+2)
Defender - 7 snails (+2)
Champion - 13 snails (+3)
Ruler and above - 21 snails (+3)
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one of the players that reached the Koshien finals has complaints about the event:
- no team voice chat
- players could hear the commentators
- hard to hear game audio
- stage lights were blinding
Nintendo of Japan is also running Worlds, so if true... this is concerning
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a TV station in Japan reported that a minor was groomed over Splatoon 2's messaging system
... of course, Splatoon 2 has no such system
what actually happened is they got in contact via Twitter and talked about Splatoon
the TV station has since apologized for the error
人気ゲーム「スプラトゥーン」のメッセージ機能で知り合った中学生と……って言っててびっくりしたんですけど
スプラにメッセージ機能なんてありませんが、フジテレビさん!?
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JP Splatoon community is having discourse on whether it was unfair to make the winners of a Turf War tournament (Koshien) compete in a tournament where all gamemodes were played
【疑問】ナワバリ最強チーム「心の怪盗」が世界大会で”ナワバリ”ではなく”ガチルール”で戦わされるのが全く理解できなかった件
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I mean, I can't say I disagree - Nintendo has tended to neglect the boy cephalopods a bit in Splatoon
but the game has other, much more pressing issues to worry about than this (*cough* stages)
not to mention a shareholders meeting isn't the right place to talk about this
[Nintendo IR]
At Nintendo’s annual shareholders meeting, a Splatoon fan complained directly to the company president about “preferential treatment of girl Inklings / Octolings” in Splatoon 3.
It’s causing a lot of drama on Japanese Twitter.
So, yeah… That happened.
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the Wii U really changed my life
without it, I wouldn't have many of my programming skills, my boyfriend, any of my followers... the list goes on and on
let's give the Nintendo Network a proper send off, shall we?
here's to the Wii U and Splatoon 1 🫡
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Side Order first impressions:
- gameplay loop is fun
- the soundtrack is great as always
- I'm a little worried there isn't enough variety in objectives and bosses to keep people engaged in the long run
- Nintendo's been very sneaky with their pre-release marketing lmfao
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I seriously wonder if N makes any attempt to come up with balanced themes? and if so, how do they vet the themes?
Big Man now has the records for both the highest (Ghost) and lowest (Bigfoot) popularity scores so far in Splatoon 3's history
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"why'd it take so long?" probably because:
- all the Wii U dev kits were put into storage
- nobody had the Wii U SDK + tools set up anymore and they had to install them on a PC
- they had to find enough people + hardware to QA the patches and make sure they didn't break anything
[Splatoon 1 / Mario Kart 8]
Online services for these games will resume on Aug 3 at 1 am UTC.
A software update will be required.
Nintendo notes that online play may be permanently shut down in the future if it continues to be difficult to keep the services running.
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this tweet was definitely written in an attempt to quell the backlash from the Japanese community over the loss of League
なお『スプラトゥーン2』でお楽しみいただいていた「リーグマッチ」について、ツキイチ・リーグマッチなどの催しを開く場としての機能は「イベントマッチ」に、フレンドといつでも腕試しができる機能は「バンカラマッチ(オープン)」に組み込まれる形になった。
それぞれ、ご活用いただければ幸いだ。
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Golden Eggs graph as of 1:37 am UTC
- the pace really picked up as we approached 700 million
- after reaching 700 million, the pace slowed down quite a bit
- slump ended at ~12 am UTC; the pace is picking up again
Japan being asleep was definitely the cause of the slump imo lol
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lopsided popularity once again
wasn't as bad as the cryptids Splatfest, but jeez Nintendo... pick better themes
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sometimes I feel like I'm the only person who thinks Splatoon 3 is a good game
I always see opinions about how this game is a trash fire and I really don't agree with that
granted, I do think Splatoon 2 does some things better, but Splatoon 3 also improves on 2 in many ways
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today's Splatoon drama in Japan: a person complained about a streamer throwing
the streamer then posted a screenshot showing that the person had 1 kill and 18 deaths (the streamer thought they were being stream sniped, so they gave up)
now people debate who's "most wrong"
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it's interesting how
@SplatoonNA
seemingly changed how they approach translating
@SplatoonJP
before Feb, the translator would add extra flourishes, like mentioning various departments of the SRL
but now they don't do this - instead they're using more direct translations
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looks like Team Theme Park might be stuck in mirror match hell? the popularity spread is heavily unbalanced... yet again
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everyone: "why doesn't Nintendo talk about who makes their games anymore? they should credit them"
also everyone: *freaks the fuck out at a likely false rumor that Emio is made by Bloober Team*
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I step away from the Internet for a few days and suddenly both the Splatoon and video game leak communities are on fire
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meanwhile, in Splatoon 3, a game that Nintendo really wants to be a competitive online shooter:
- peer-to-peer netcode
- 16 Hz tick
- "the connection is unstable"
- US$25 per year (or US$50 with Expansion Pack)
The most important part of every Counter-Strike match? Shooting and movement. We're going beyond tick rates in Counter-Strike 2:
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the pace at which we're collecting eggs has slowed quite a bit since reaching 700 million
I suspect this might be due to Japan being asleep
if this continues, we may not reach 2 billion eggs by the end
currently expecting 900 million at 5 am UTC ish
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someone just went on a 11 tweet pro-emulation, fuck Nintendo rant in this tweet's reply
it doesn't even have anything to do with emulation
I watched most of pannen's invisible walls video, and it honestly really makes me appreciate Super Mario 64 more
just the fact that the game was one of the first of its kind, and yet it actually works and plays well (even if it does have *a lot* of jank) is incredible
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first impressions
if this is the final season: I am very underwhelmed
if this isn't the final season: looks OK, if not a bit content-light (it's the same amount as last season, but there's no Side Order to prop it up)
guess we'll see what they announce on Twitter later
Put your shades and sandals on because Sizzle Season 2024 is on the way!
Expect a new stage, music, emotes, and two fresh new weapons, as well as the debut of the chaotic BIG Big Run! All Grizzco employees on deck!
This new season turns up the heat on 6/1!
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it's scary how fast misinformation can spread
some fan decided to name a Salmon Run music track "Chaos Carnival", and it spread around enough that it became the de facto name
and then Nintendo released an official one via the jukebox (Frothy Waters)
now it has two names!
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cannon = a thing that shoots large projectiles at people
canon = what actually happened in the source material
if you talk about your "headcannon", I'm going to imagine that either
A) you have a cannon strapped to your head, or
B) your head is literally a cannon
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Pearl: "Eight - did you... really get splatted by a portal?"
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Drizzle Season 2023 thoughts:
underwhelming in terms of content, I expected more for 1 year anniversary... feels a bit same-y to the other seasons
Splatfest might have fucked popularity again
my prediction for Side Order is trailer in Sep 2023 Direct, release mid Oct w/ 5.1.0
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I really would've preferred if Nintendo provided a road map or something along with the Sizzle Season 2024 trailer
would be great to have some transparency regarding the future of the game after this season
there's just so much copium and doomposting going around right now
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imo "Super Nintendo Switch" would be a good name for the new console
I don't think it would be too confusing for consumers since we have "Pro" versions of various electronics nowadays
but whatever Nintendo chooses, I sure hope they don't include "New" or "U" in the name
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masatosama, analyst/coach: 🧵
I think everyone who watched Worlds thought "wow, the overseas teams moved so fast and were very strong!"
I came up with two reasons why:
1. no division of roles between the front and rearguard
2. making the most of VC while playing
1/12
【スプラ3世界大会2024について】
見たひとみんな「海外チームが速くて強い！」という感想だったと思う、私もそう。なのでその速くて強い理由を私なりに想像して考えてみた
結論、大きな理由は2つ
1．前衛・後衛の役割分担をしてない
2．通話を活かしたプレイしてる
リプライで詳しく説明
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it's all about minimizing risk (making sure they don't get sued by Jackpot) and limiting the PR fallout
would I have liked them to respond faster? absolutely
but I get why it took them this long (the controversy might've caught them off guard too tbh)
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apparently some JP players are upset that Fizzbangs are included in Splatfest Battle (Pro)
seems like they just want to play serious, "ranked" Turf War without any additional mechanics
I'm not sure if this is a popular opinion though
【大悲報】フェスチャレンジにハナビダマ実装で批判殺到、唯一のガチナワバリで遊ぶ機会が失われパーティーゲーが加速
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sometimes I wonder if Nintendo's content moderation team have had meetings over some memes from Splatoon 3's not-Miiverse
just imagine a bunch of middle aged people sitting in a boardroom debating whether or not they should be deleting posts saying "I kiss men"
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Nintendo's official fact sheet for the Wii U at E3 2011 didn't even include a picture of the fuckin' console
unless you count those 5 blurry pixels in the background of that image
I knew the Wii U's marketing was bad but holy shit lmao
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it's funny how everyone is calling this Miiverse 2, when the whole plaza post feature is still called Miiverse internally even in Splatoon 2 and 3
[Splatoon 3]
It appears Nintendo will add the ability to create Plaza posts without a Facebook or Twitter account sometime in the future.
A server-side switch for this feature was added in 4.1.0. Tutorial text was also changed to remove references to "social media".
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fun fact: on the Switch, the eShop and Nintendo Switch Online apps are both just websites (React web apps) loaded in a web browser
the Switch's web browser also doesn't have a JIT to speed up JavaScript execution - wonder if it would improve the lag if one was added
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Nintendo just dropping this shit at a completely random time of day
As of early April 2024, online play and other functionality that uses online communication will end service for Nintendo 3DS and Wii U software. Thank you very much for your continued support of our products.
Find out more:
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I sent my Pro Controller to Nintendo for repair because of drift, and I think I was sent a brand new (or refurb) one in return
my controller was all scratched up, and the one I got back looks completely pristine
I paid $30 and a new one costs $70, so I'm pretty happy with that
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some of the reactions to the Big Run bug kinda remind me of post-Splatfest salt
I've seen people call Big Run "rigged", that the game is "dogshit", etc
like, it's a bug... Nintendo is going to fix it + give people their correct rewards soon... no need to get this worked up
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I wonder why Nintendo hasn't done more sponsored Splatfests? seems like a missed opportunity
Japan in particular had a lot of them in 1 and 2
I know some people dislike this stuff, but I personally don't (if I have no opinion on the theme I'll vote by idol)
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I feel like this needs to be repeated
the reused catalog gear is shitty, yes, but I don’t think N is “lazy” because of it
this is likely some deliberate choice made during planning (possibly to reduce workload because side order dev is ramping up? we’ll see next season)
I really dislike when people call dev teams "lazy" for releasing something poor
if anything, you should be blaming the higher ups for making decisions that allowed the product to get into such a state
most of the team are just trying to do the best that they can
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I bet Nintendo is laughing their asses off at how badly they fractured the emulation community (at least for Switch and 3DS) with just one lawsuit
just look at all of the drama recently
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prediction: zero of the balance changes in the upcoming patch were affected by the results at Worlds
the patch was probably finalized last week minimum because of QA + debug
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imagine being a dev at Shiver Entertainment
- join a studio that primarily does port work
- the studio gets bought
- your parent company goes into debt
- you worry for your job
- suddenly, Nintendo decides to buy your studio
- you're now the uncle that works at Nintendo
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it's amazing just how many people I've seen ask if Dolphin supports the Wii U
Nintendo's shitty marketing and naming scheme continues to affect people even years after the Wii U's discontinuation
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when Nintendo names a game or console in marketing, they almost always refer to them like:
"the ___ game"
"the ___ system"
example: "the Splatoon 3 game for the Nintendo Switch system"
I don't remember who pointed this out to me, but I haven't been able to unsee it ever since
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I really don't understand what drives people to do dangerous super jumps
like I'll be in a fight surrounded by 3 enemy players and a respawning teammate will still be like "better super jump to him"
like can't y'all see on the turf map I'm being mobbed right now lol
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also I like how they accuse me of being a Nintendo defender
I'm literally a dev for the Dolphin emulator
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imo it's good that N is changing the Big Run rewards system
the egg counts increasing might've accelerated the player decline, since higher counts can demotivate casuals
it would've been a vicious cycle: egg counts go up, so people stop playing, so egg counts go up...
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I do have to say, Nintendo really cooked with the Grand Festival - very impressed at the amount of content here
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I wonder why Nintendo decided to only show the post-Splatfest plazas for 2 hours after the Splatfest ends?
I feel like a bunch of people wouldn't be able to see them because of time zones
imo it should be around for at least 24 hours
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honestly, it really doesn't feel like it's been 9 years since Nintendo announced the existence of the NX project...
I was around for all of the NX pre-launch shenanigans, and man was it a ride
the Switch still feels like the "new thing" to me as well
time really does fly, huh
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dug out my Wii U for the first time in a while, and holy jesus is the OS slow
while I do love the extra bells and whistles like the menu music, I would gladly choose to leave those out if it meant everything didn't take 2 years to load
makes me appreciate the Switch more
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first impression: people who already play main weapons with a Trizooka kit or an alt kit w/ a Trizooka have such a big advantage (already knowing how to use it)
meanwhile I'm here having to learn a new main in real time
it should just give you a Trizooka regardless of your main
[Splatoon 3]
The first slot for the "Too Many Trizookas" Challenge has started.
You must use a weapon kit with a Trizooka. The special gauge will quickly charge by itself.
Next slots (2 hours each):
- 10 am UTC
- 6 pm UTC
For times in your time zone:
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the Japanese have come up with a good name for the stupid blue check bots that are spamming up people's replies: インプレゾンビ (impression zombies)
this is what I'm going to be calling them from now on
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y'know that CGP Grey interactive video about winning streaks in Rock Paper Scissors?
if you lose many times in a row he becomes interested in your losing streak b/c it's exceptional that you didn't win at least once
that's what Frye reminds me of
[Splatoon 3]
Team Bear Cubs wins!!
This is the second Splatfest to use the new scoring system introduced in 7.0.0, where the runner-up in each category also gets points.
However, the winner would still be the same even under the old system.
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prediction: Drizzle Season 2023 reveal on Tue or Wed; small chance it could be Thu too
assuming there's a trailer, it'll be uploaded at 1 pm UTC, otherwise first info will be on SplatoonJP at 9 am UTC
if N announces it before this automated tweet then gg me :)
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tukiyomi, from Phantom Thief:
"looking back, I wonder if we could've performed better if we had more time to practice....
it felt like the positioning we played up until now in Turf War fell apart because we had little practice with Ranked gamemodes"
配信乙でした！
なんかこう見返して見ると、練習時間もっとあったら意識の刷り込み出来て立ち回り良く出来てたのかなぁと思う内容だった😞😞
ナワバリで出来てたポジショニングがバンカラマッチの慣れが無くて崩れた感じだ
みんな来てくれてありがとうー
明日以降は普通にスプラします
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seems JP fans are concerned about reputational damage to Splatoon, Nintendo, and video games in general
I saw at least one claim that said their parent took away Splatoon 3 from their sibling because they saw this + concluded it's "dangerous"
who knows if that's true though
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the jellyfish in Splatoon are known as "Jerry" internally because of the classic L/R mix up
ever since I found that out I've always called them Jerries
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1.5 billion eggs reached at around 22:45 UTC
we're currently in a slump period, so I doubt it's going to get much better than this unless we put in some serious effort
(data points past 1 billion provided by ashbinary_, Coxxs, and InternalLoss)
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Nogami appears at the Koshien finals - wonder when the last time we saw him was
a few months ago some conspiracy theories were circulating on JP twitter that Nogami being kept out of the public eye because he was one of the targets of the Koshien + Worlds threats
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the amount of people I see posting screenshots of the Direct where they specifically put the text "League Battle" on the screen and calling it "false advertising" is amazing
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I really dislike when people call dev teams "lazy" for releasing something poor
if anything, you should be blaming the higher ups for making decisions that allowed the product to get into such a state
most of the team are just trying to do the best that they can
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things that irrationally annoy me: competitive Splatoon players calling the act of covering walls and floors in ink "painting"
Splatoon doesn't have paint - it has ink, damn it
if anything, the term should be "inking"
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if Twitter wants to be a serious video platform, the experience needs to be better
probably my biggest issue is that for the first 15 seconds of every video, the player plays a low quality version with terrible muffled audio
oh, and the random loading errors... gotta love those
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prediction: Switch 2 will have back compat
the Switch 2 will almost certainly have ARM CPU + NVIDIA GPU (+ prob Horizon OS) again, so it'll be much easier unlike Switch -> Wii U
I see no technical reason for N to not add it this time (well, greed, but that's not technical)
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how much do y'all want to bet that I'm going to look at TTYD's internals on Switch and find it's a complete rebuild from the ground up on Origami King's engine
and then people will still claim it's a remaster
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if this suit goes to trial, it will be a watershed moment for the emulation community
as far as I'm aware, this is the first direct attack by a major gaming company on emulation since Sony v. Bleem in 2000(!)
[Yuzu]
Nintendo is suing the developers of the Switch emulator Yuzu.
They allege that the Yuzu developers willingly facilitate and profit on piracy of Switch games (via Patreon), specifically pointing to Yuzu being used to play leaked copies of TotK before its release date.
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ah yes, april 1st
the one day on which it's a bad idea to post any legitimate news because everyone will just think it's fake
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the spambots on this platform are too predictable now - they need to mix it up a bit every now and then
imagine if, for pride month, they all change their spam to MY COCK IN BIO and gay porn
now *that* would be well worth the upcoming Twitter entrance fee
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this is kinda weird, but I'm slightly overwhelmed with how open Crableg Capital and Shipshape Cargo Co. are
I'm not used to this type of freedom after a year of playing hallway maps lol
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this app launched in 2018 and they're only adding landscape support to Android *now*
[Nintendo Switch Online app]
Version 2.10.0 is now out.
Android users can now use the app in landscape mode.
... Yeah.
(thanks Samuel)
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Splatoon 3 was a gigantic missed opportunity for Nintendo to make improvements to the netcode
while we did get NPLN out of it (which is an improvement, don't get me wrong), they could've gone much further
Splatoon is not the type of game that should be running on P2P netcode!
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I would not have blamed Nintendo if they decided to just shut everything down rather than invest the time + money into this
which, to be fair, is what they're likely going to do if another vuln is found
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the fact that Nintendo has no big blockbuster titles (that are not remakes, ports, or spin-offs) lined up for 2024 kinda implies to me that the Switch is being wound down
all the good shit is being saved for the next generation's launch year
guess we'll see what happens in Feb
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"Lemuria Hub, the new stage, is definitely Kyoto Station!!"
Nintendo's HQ is in Kyoto, if you didn't know
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holy shit the “charles isn’t voicing mario in wonder” conspiracy theories are maybe true????
We have a message for fans of the Mushroom Kingdom. Please take a look.
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reading Japanese can be really something because JP people abbreviate *everything*
tbh it's understandable, a lot of foreign import words are really long lol
a recent example that stumped me for a bit: ラピエリ (rapieli) -> Rブラスターエリート (Rapid Blaster Elite)
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going into halftime, it looks like there is a bit of a popularity imbalance (because of course there is) according to
might contribute to Li'l Bunnies getting more mirror matches in Tricolor
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I got my first hate mail for having a 🏳️🌈 in my main account's name
seems to be from a spamming troll account, and yes they liked their own tweet
I feel very honored - when do I get to give my acceptance speech
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"in the Mario Kart 8 Deluxe game on the Nintendo Switch system as part of the paid Mario Kart 8 Deluxe - Booster Course Pass DLC"
when Nintendo names a game or console in marketing, they almost always refer to them like:
"the ___ game"
"the ___ system"
example: "the Splatoon 3 game for the Nintendo Switch system"
I don't remember who pointed this out to me, but I haven't been able to unsee it ever since
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I just want to be a fly in the room of Nintendo of America's PR and marketing teams right now
they must be having a bunch of meetings etc over their games appearing on that one Twitter account... wonder what they will do in response (if anything)
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