Amelia Pepper
@PervyPepper
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Following
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I sometimes blog about my fake adventures. It's not for kids though.
Wales, United Kingdom
Joined April 2013
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Last Seen Profiles
Saw the Farmer this morning in his little golf buggy. Said that she visited me every day and I wanted to buy her. He said ‘oh, next time she visits just put them in your garden and close the gate. I like the idea of her being a pet’ Not how I imagined the conversation 😆
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My boyfriend is upstairs packing, as he is moving out. So I’m downstairs buying new shoes.
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@im_all_id
I met someone in a club and when I asked him what he did I thought he said ‘magician’, so asked him to show me tricks. He looked surprised, but did. It wasn’t until much later I found out he’d said musician.
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I try to arrange the cats as neatly as possible when they aren’t in use.
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@jamesdraper
@im_all_id
He made some coins disappear and reappear out my nose. You know, the usual stuff, which I was probably more impressed with because I was drunk. But he made the effort!
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@MckKirk
@couch_maria
@theresa_may
You're taxed when you earn it, taxed when you save it, and taxed again when you die. Yep, that's fair.
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Been having issues with a kitten that won’t eat solid food. He’s refusing all sorts of kitten food, cat yoghurt, everything I can think of to tempt him. I’ve puréed things, mixed things with kitten milk. Nope. Just eating an apricot Danish, and he leant over and bit off a chunk.
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@adrianlenard
I have all my paperwork, a small holding number, access to a farm vet and they have a paddock, shelter and food. She will be with her lamb, six goats and probably more sheep soon. But thanks for the concern.
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@suepick25
Doing everything by the rules here, thanks. Already registered as a smallholding and herd already has an inventory and tagged. Always treat all the animals as required. Only thing is the shearing, but I’m going to ask for a lesson.
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Advice: Getting two rescue goats is unwise when they have come from a herd. They will try and join the sheep in a nearby field, and you will feel so guilty you will go back and get their friends. And then you will end up with seven goats.
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@bekkirivz
@sassimommi
@DaniMathers
She may think she's beautiful but she's just showed everyone how ugly she really is.
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For the last few days a sheep from the neighbouring farm has brought her lamb to visit me. Bf didn’t believe it when I told him until he found her waiting at the gate for me. I am going to offer to buy her from the farmer, when I have some money/job.
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Sofa and chairs inside covered in cats, don’t want to move them so go outside to sit instead. Oh:
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Tried to take a lovely photo but my shadow looked like a cock and ruined it.
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He died this morning. RIP to one of the most irritating, annoying, rudest men I had the displeasure to meet. Who actually turned out to be one of the bravest and kindest. I’m so glad we were mates at the end.
Update: He’s now on end of life care. And he told someone that me and him ‘are good mates now’. Wish we weren’t because this is too sad. On the train to see him.
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Dear men who have a problem with my tweet: I’m not that woman you’re so bitter about. A) A pair of those shoes I bought were for him. B) I’m allowed to put what I want on my Twitter, and C) not once have I bad mouthed him. And I won’t. He’s bloody ace. We clear?!
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@Honeyomine
He did say to me ‘oh I’m sorry, there’s things you need to have livestock’ but once I said I already had all the licences, he was on board. I think he was so surprised he couldn’t say no 😆
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@jrheath75965
@gammelvindnz
@ofherswanways
I avoid ice in my drinks too, as look what happened to the Titanic!
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@rickburin
@betamother
I’m working on my coffee table book featuring many stunning portraits of cats
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@The8treGirl
@NormanSuzy1
@Chhokkwangun
@achysmileblog
Sadly, I think you’re lucky. My MIL went to the doctors for years and got fobbed off. When they finally did tests it was too late. I myself had 19 years of being told I was a ‘neurotic depressive’ because I also kept saying I felt crap. I paid for private tests - Lyme disease!
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Bought the abandoned rabbit a lovely new hutch for her to sleep in. Just opened the door to check on her:
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Elvis has left the building. 6 Feb 2009 - 30 Jan 2023. Loved my boy so, so much.
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My shop has been painted. I’d like to say I spent hours deliberating on the colour but I just pointed at one of the only ones that I could afford. It’s brighter than it looked in the shop. 😐
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Catalonia banned bullfighting and Spain overturned the ban. That tells me all I need to know about both sides.
#Catalunya
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When my Nan died I inherited her jewellery box. There’s nothing of any value in it. It’s full of bits from Christmas crackers, tiddlywinks, an old bookies pen, a badge from some work thing in the 1970s. But it’s oddly all the more precious for that!
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Someone has farted on the train and I think the man opposite thinks it's me. But it wasn't.
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And to go with the shoes...kittens. Because everyone needs kittens in their lives. They will move in shortly.
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My 13 month old cat ordered a big shop from
@Tesco
and they won't refund me. And it was mostly potato waffles.
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@jamieeast
That flu is harsh though, I just looked in the mirror and saw it’s turned me into Janette Krankie.
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Just chatting about the time I took my two year old son to York, and as we passed King’s Manor he said ‘I used to live here when I was James’
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We put the sign up this afternoon! I couldn’t afford a proper one so I made it myself. It’s a bit wonky but it’ll do for now 🙂 Edna Falcon antiques, homewares and gifts.
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He’s a little mischief maker, now he’s eating properly.
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I’m in a Wetherspoons having a coffee and a woman has just put £200 in the fruit machines and lost it all. Does she not know how many goats she could have bought for that?! (4)
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When you try and get over a breakup by dating someone else, but it goes wrong.
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I’m going to my friend’s funeral on Monday, and his parents are using his Facebook profile to post the details. They’ve just marked him as ‘going’. I couldn’t help it. I laughed. He would have approved.
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@MrMcPhallus
@laurenmarybyrne
@skarp0
@artcrimeprof
@KellyLeaWatson
I wish I could have sparklers on my food but I’m vegan.
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@CandiceYYZ
@suepick25
I need a fake sheep like those heads that trainee hairdressers practice on 😆
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@mrliamdurkin
@ScrtDrugAddict
@GreggsOfficial
The same reason people slow down to look at car crashes.
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@mand_brun
I will be, but gosh it’s just so damn sad. And he’s very lovely and it was a joint decision xx
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@perrigame
I’m very sad, but he’s not had much luck living here, and he’s managed to get a good job back in his home town. So... xx
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@Fizzimyst
@godhateshayden
@couch_maria
@MckKirk
@theresa_may
Soup kitchens will be banned for those in need!
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I have to share a hotel room with my Mum and I’ve just overheard her saying quietly ‘boobs, go free!’ as she took her bra off. 😳
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@RoseCityCupCake
@Honeyomine
I’d worked it all out in my head what to say and he totally blindsided me 😆
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Good morning! (They do have more than a mug full, that’s just the scoop!)
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@LeviDteez
@sophiegrenham
Cheers Drive is also a Bristol thing. So much so we even have t-shirts there
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Me and my friend kept making half-plans and not finalising anything, and not seeing each other for ages, and being all rubbish. And he’s died, and I’ll never see him again. And so this is me reminding you to see those people and do those things you’re putting off.
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@Sd1x8Sd1x
Luckily their paddock was a sheep one before we moved in, so there’s nothing dangerous for them. We’ve built some stables and they have their mineral licky thing.
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My girl (Flora 34a) and her baby Lambert are still in the big field amongst a hundred others, but come running when I call her. We are going to be bringing her over to her new home in the next few days. (She’s currently in a secure field where she can’t break out to visit)
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I'm going for a drink with a man tomorrow night. I need to lose three stone and gain a personality in 24 hours
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My friend took this photo of me two months ago and it’s unflattering but it makes me laugh. I always hoped I’d be a sophisticated looking grown up. Nope.
#fatface
#Fortyfive
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@Djk959595
@NickiPlayhouse_
But if I had sworn at them as a male, especially a black male, and not with my white posh female voice, I would have been nicked.
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@bwcollie1
Aww, thank you but it’s just the culmination of a really crap year, and outside influences. He’s lovely.
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Why are car boot sales so effing early?! Why can’t people sell their shit at a sensible time?
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@UKlPVoter
@Fizzimyst
@godhateshayden
@couch_maria
@MckKirk
@theresa_may
It was a half serious comment based on the fact she's getting rid of school lunches for kids in need.
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Baby George Michael has got his big boy face now, but still only the size of an 8 week old kitten
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The Chinese takeaway near me is called ‘Wok You Like’. If I had one I’d call it ‘Wok You On About?’ or ‘You Fuckin Wok?!’
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@bekkirivz
@sassimommi
@DaniMathers
Exactly a decent human being wouldn't have considered doing this, it would never have crossed their mind
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@evanslis456
I was always worried I’d go and visit my Nan and there’d just be a charred armchair and a pair of checked slippers, as per EVERY photo of spontaneous combustion
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@lyonsness
He was lucky the other day and got a whole two quid from the couple who had 11 dog bags of dog crap in the sides of the door!
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Just trying to take a photo of the kitten and she sneezed. Catchoo!
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Literally spent all day crying and saying goodbye to Mojo, wherever he was. And the little furry bastard just came home ❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️
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Me: Can I have a wee in private?
Cats: Everyone gather in the bathroom for the ‘private wee’!
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@Amylia80
@KatieAKarlson
@WilliamCarrigan
@jordanbpeterson
Or Bill Clinton. Remind me never to date a Bill.
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I haven’t posted much about foster baby Earl, because she was the sole survivor of a litter, a tiny baby who needed to be bottle fed, and who slept in a box on a heated pad. I was scared she was too fragile. She’s just won in a playfight with the dog.
#Proud
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News from home: Someone has found a dumped rabbit on the road and has brought it to our house because they think we are a animal rescue. Meet Claudia the rabbit who apparently now lives with us:
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It’s Goat Eve! We are picking them up tomorrow. Don’t know much of their backstory other than they were abandoned. We have their house and field all ready and waiting.
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I have an online interview today, and I have to do a ten minute presentation. To say I’m nervous is an understatement. Maybe I’ll just take my laptop out and show them goats!
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@MGKwena
@FizzleWizzleLoL
@CGGuy44
@EmEvilate
Also, sadly, you have to try and get as much evidence as you can, because people rarely believe you if you just tell them.
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@blkgirllostkeys
I don’t feel like I survived it. I’m still trying to claw my way out of it by starting more education I fail to complete.
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Poppy has had a comfortable night, took all her meds like a superstar, and has had a fish breakfast. We are so grateful for all the love.
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I really, really hate when people pretend to be their animals on Facebook and talk like this:
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Update: He’s now on end of life care. And he told someone that me and him ‘are good mates now’. Wish we weren’t because this is too sad. On the train to see him.
I’ve often spoken about how much I dislike my Mum’s husband, and how much he dislikes me back. But he is terminally ill, and so we are making a concerted effort to get along. Tomorrow he is taking me for afternoon tea. This is a very good start.
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@HawkeyeKnows
@sharrond62
@AllisonPearson
Surely someone who ‘couldn’t care less’ would have just scrolled past and ignored it?
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@ThereRamp
@LewishamGeordie
@fesshole
That’s exactly something me and my brother would say to each other, and find it funny. My Dad actually died from an aneurysm set off by Bristol Rovers having to take penalty shootouts in the play offs!
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@RingsDanceFlies
Don’t worry (appreciate it though x), we have the Mum here too, and we’ve looked after several orphaned ones. This one just doesn’t want to eat cat food. He just wants human food 😆
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