My sleet mountain is nearly three feet high here in Walls. Caused by the valley on my roof. My gutters runneth over. @RonChilders @TylerWREG @RileyWinchWx @PatrickEllisWx @EBrillWx

"Not a smidgen of ice on my magnolia leaves here in the idyllic suburbs of beautiful downtown Walls, Mississippi*," extolled the old retired English teacher. *aka Lynchburg, Mississippi @RonChilders @TylerWREG @RileyWinchWx @PatrickEllisWx @EBrillWx

My Patty O'Patio 13 miles south of the FedEx Forum. Haven't checked, but I'm thinking about an inch of sleet. @RonChilders @PatrickEllisWx @EricBrill @TylerEliasenWREG @RileyWinchWx

They had music in 2008?

Watched a minute of an NBA game today. I'll never get that minute back.

My cat begs to go outside so he can beg to come inside.

Kid: Mom, do you really love me? Mom: I used to wipe you butt. Kid: 👀 Mom: 👀

The bailouts wouldn't be needed except for the tariffs.

Cheese orange fingers-- Artificial flavored chips-- A child's smiling face--

The praying mantis doesn't lie. Kinda wet in the idyllic suburbs of beautiful downtown Walls, Mississippi. @RonChilders @EBrillWx @PatrickEllisWx @RileyWinchWx

Bananas don't wait on you. You eat them when they're ready or they leave.

Wife: Can't you say ANYTHING nice about our daughter-in-law? Me: She makes a lot of carbon dioxide for plants. W: 👀 M: 😁 W: She is pretty, though. M: Pretty carbon dioxide.

Got a beauty appointment at 1:30. Hope it works this time.

In most jurisdictions it's unlawful to make a cat unclawful.

Being comfortable in retirement is such a different vibe. Back in my working days my checking account never hit $3K and often went below $100. Right now I'm waiting for my next SSA check to hit so when I transfer a good deal of money, to savings, my account doesn't got below $3K.

Me: What did I do to my hearing aids? Wife: *pointing at them where I randomly left them on the dining table* Me: *picking up my hearing aids* Idiot! Wife: Don't compliment yourself.

An author who challenged her kind Was totally amazed find That most can write As well as they fight Until they go out of their mind. Another wasted minute.

My wife bought me a new tri-fold wallet a few years back. I might start using it--in 8 to 10 years. I love new things!

Dropped my Cracker Barrel pancake on the ground. Baby's suspicious.

Being hearing impaired is not all bad. My wife's yabbering away about something. I'm on Twitter and YouTube.