Kids, i shit you not; there used to be a phone number you could call just to find out what time it was.

One thing I won’t ever do again is build a snow dalek. I did that when we lived at our old house as the kids were into Dr Who. I learnt that when snowdaleks start to melt they upset the neighbours #snowman #snowdalek #drwho

Got @StarTrek earrings........... Cause I'm such a nerd 😛

Help wanted: White House Chief of Staff. No experience necessary. Must respond well to infighting, backbiting, dishonesty and dishonor. Excited by the prospect of an impossible work environment? Enjoy humiliation? Apply now! *Background check ... negotiable.

“I’m here for you. I feel your pain. I’ll do whatever it takes to help you get through this...” @BarackObama “Bye everyone. Don’t forget to rake the floors. Oh and it’s your fault. Vote for me.” ~ @realDonaldTrump

#PresidentialAlert National alert that your president is mentally #UNFIT Respond by voting.

* (After you vote, please retweet - to get a wide sample of "both sides" - thanks.) What grade do give to ( @realDonaldTrump ) - the Trump Presidency?

The image of Trump golfing at his private course while presidents Obama, Bush, and Clinton gathered to pay tribute to honor, decency, and unity tells you almost everything you need to know about his character.

Welcome back to Florida, @realDonaldTrump. My name is Andrew Gillum and I'm the only candidate for Governor who believes you deserve to be impeached. So does everyone else who RTs this.

Heard on @maddow : "I've seen more unpredictable episodes of the Road Runner" re: Rand "Pauling"

Real quick... who won?

BREAKING: Scientists have now discovered that a Scaramucci can be divided into an even smaller time span: the Guiliani.

https://t.co/ZXyWt18hT2

Father of Parkland victim slams NRA videos: "If this was put out by a terrorist organization, we would be raising the terror threat level in this country. Why are we letting this lobby have anything to do with DC? I don't understand it!" https://t.co/4hcz6lRFLO

We deeply believe that this country's most precious gift is our children. They are our future. We must keep them safe. Beginning today, DICK'S Sporting Goods is committed to the following: https://t.co/J4OcB6XJnu

Hi, yes... I’d like to report an assault 😐 https://t.co/sbH6EKetlj