Mel🏊♥️
@LLLChick
Followers
3,140
Following
3,765
Media
2,934
Statuses
57,617
Mum ❤️❤️❤️ & Grandma ❤️ Living with mental illness C-PTSD Bipolar Wild swimmer 🏊 Learning to love myself Peer support ❤️
Sheffield, England
Joined September 2010
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Last Seen Profiles
Pinned Tweet
I've watched it this evening, it's amazing please watch
#TeamBethForever
Our documentary on Beth Matthews is now up - I’ll try and write a longer thread tomorrow thanking everyone involved - but for now here’s the link
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My little boy (not so little, he's 18 & 5ft 9") who lost his biological parents when he was 8 years old, has just received an unconditional offer to study Music at The Academy of Contemporary Music in Birmingham, I'm SO bloody proud ❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️
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On the day her family hopefully feel like they get some sort of justice for Beth
@BethMatthewsz
let's share the most beautiful picture of her & remind them how much love & support there is for all of them on here, let's fill twitter with her smile, please RT
#TeamBethForever
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This morning I was laid in bed crying, not wanting to face the world, a wonderful new friend dragged me out of bed & took me to a local natural plunge pool, my first time, I can't explain how amazing it was
#MentalIllness
#WildSwimming
#SelfCare
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I took a big step today & let a photographer take some photos whilst I was swimming. I really struggle with pictures of myself as I often find they trigger traumatic memories but I actually ❤️❤️❤️ these
#mentalhealth
#wildswimming
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I've never, ever faked my
#MentalIllness
I have, however, faked being mentally well, endless times
#MentalHealth
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The next few weeks are going to be really, really difficult for Beth's family & friends, me included. Lets try really hard to remember that amazing smile & how much she meant, and still does, to so many of us ❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️
I love you Beth
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A friend asked me if I was ok today, I'd normally say "yeah I'm fine thanks" but I didn't I said "no, I'm really not ok", she packed a bag and she's come to stay with me tonight 💖💖
#MentalHealth
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Last night I listened to
@Fearnecotton
@elliegoulding
podcast & decided that from today I was going to sit in my living room without my phone for an hour every day, I've just coloured for 2 hours!!
#mentalhealth
#selfcare
#newpens
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Please, please stop asking suicidal people why their children aren't protective factors, it doesn't work like that 😭😭😭😭😭😭😭
#mentalhealth
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She said she wasn't capable of A Level's but her teachers told her otherwise. She hated nearly every minute of it & anxiety & covid made it even harder but today she got 2 C's & I'm SO friggin proud of her ❤️❤️❤️
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Tonight I'm thinking of all those spending Xmas in hospital, any type of hospital, and sending all my love as i spend my second xmas in a row on a psych ward. Merry Christmas everyone i really hope it's not too horrendous
#MentalHealth
#physicalhealth
#christmas
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TW suicide
To all my twitter friends who are hurting tonight following the horrendous news about
@TraumaPhDandMe
please look after yourselves, the pain is real & tlc is needed. I'm around if anyone wants to talk
#mentalhealth
#suicide
#twittercommunity
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I miss you so bloody much, I would never have believed the pain from losing someone you'd never actually met in really life could feel like this. I pray so hard you've found the peace you so desperately needed Beth, I love you
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I'm so sick of reading about people asking for help, the help not being there and then the world losing another beautiful soul 💔💔💔💔
#mentalhealth
#suicide
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You touched the lives of so many & continue to literally save lives after your death. The world is a better place for having you in it Beth 💔💔💔💔💔
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So, so proud of my eldest right now. She's 30 weeks pregnant with her first child & having a few problems. She's attending all hospital appts on her own (she's only 19), she's really worried but she's asking all the right questions & doing all the right things 💖💖💖💖💖
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Would you like to meet my Granddaughter....... Frankie-Amelia, 7lbs 13oz. Born after a very quick labour & her mummy & her are both amazing. I'm unbelievably happy 💖💖💖💖💖
#GrannyMel
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I've had a bad day so youngest thought I needed cheering up, he ordered desert, rhubarb and apple crumble with custard 💖💖💖💖
#luckymummy
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A saw a psychologist today, first time I've ever seen one as an inpatient. She said something that's stuck with me all day, she said "your bucket is full of sadness & there isn't any room for hope in it" she's so right 😭😭😭😭😭
#mentalhealth
#mentalillness
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On Thurs 16yr old daughter was in 8 bed adult ward. Staff nurse asked if I was ok cos I looked exhausted & tearful. Next thing single room with camp bed for me, tea & toast for me & HCA went & bought me coke, crisps n choc too, wouldn't take a penny from me
@SheffieldHosp
❤❤❤
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I've got an emergency mental health assessment this afternoon, my support worker told them she wasn't leaving till I'd had one 😭😭😭😭😭😭😭
#mentalhealth
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This is me, I don't look it but I'm mentally very unwell. I'm trying my hardest not to let this win, I'm distracting as best as I can, surrounding myself with those who love me but this, & masking, is exhausting & I can't see a light
#MentalIllness
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Is it ok to unfollow people that are doing wonderful things but their tweets trigger you
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I've just dropped my oldest off at the hospital & next time I see her she will be a mummy 💖💖💖💖💖💖💖
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TW Self neglect
Do other people struggle to wash, shower, dress for long periods when feeling so unwell mentally? I daren't admit to anyone how long it's been
#MentalIllness
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** WARNING **
don't give me no crap
This was simply the best swim ever 😊😊 I can't put in to words what swimming has done for me but someone I only met 6 weeks ago said tonight "Mel you looked so sad & broken when I met you & tonight you look alive"
#mentalhealth
#selfcare
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@MoiraDonegan
@Sian_L_S
No it doesn't!! I'm a victim and i wouldn't want anyone being found guilty if they weren't, people lie
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SO impressed with Nans care at A&E
@SheffieldHosp
tonight. 92yrs old, confused, accidental od, ? infection.
Mum went to leave & was told to stay with her. Until she was transferred to the
#FrailtyUnit
mum stayed & staff reassured my nan & mum they were safe
#ThankYouNHS
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One for Beth, one for Zoe & one for all the others lost to mental illness We will never forget 💔💔💔💔 It had to be Stella, Beth's favourite ❤️❤️❤️❤️
@BethMatthewsz
#JusticeForZoe
#mentalhealth
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I did it, I hosted my first Mental Health Swim, it was wonderful, 5 wonderful ladies & me
#OpenWaterSwim
#MentalHealth
#SelfCare
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I'm sorry if this offends anybody but I'm fu**ing angry 🤬🤬 Asking for help isn't the problem, asking & no help being available is the problem. We're let down time & time again so we stop asking & we die & then everyone says I wish they'd asked for help 😭😭
#mentalhealth
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Wondering if any1 in
#Sheffield
has an adults bike, in good condition, that they no longer use & would be happy to donate to a young man I'm working with. He would be completely overwhelmed with gratitude & isn't aware I'm asking Please RT
#mentalhealth
#cycling
@HelpSheffield
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TW suicide
Tonight's events have reminded me of the night Beth died 💔💔💔💔💔
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Look what I've got.......
I'm so overwhelmed 💖💖💖💖💖☺️☺️☺️☺️☺️🥲🥲🥲🥲🥲🥲🥲
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I'm celebrating the fact that I'm free from him, completely, with red wine & chocolate on my friends sofa in beautiful Spain, it will always be my happy place & the link to him has gone, I'm free from him at last
#mentalhealth
#domesticabuse
(
@dawnrose007
wanted you to know)
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#BPD
has been removed from my
#mentalhealth
records &
#CPTSD
&
#Bipolar
added, a head full of missed feelings right now. Hearing your psychiatrist say that he would like a detailed advanced care statement in place because he believes you are at high risk of suicide is hard
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I'm making a little book for
@BethMatthewsz
family & partner, showing them how loved she was by so many on here. If you followed, & loved, Beth I'd love to know why she was so special to you, what it was that about her that attracted over 20k followers
#InMemoryOfBeth
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Today i was struggling and a support worker noticed. Within 10 mins I'd had a 1-1 with a nurse and some prn. Simply cannot fault the care here at Cygnet Chesterfield. Credit where credit is due
#mentalhealth
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I just saw my CC, I told her about Aoifa, she had tears in her eyes & said I wish I could say I can't believe it but I can. She said she was terrified this was going to be me when HTT refused my referral 2 weeks ago & that this is why the good staff are leaving
#mentalhealth
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Nearly 12 months after I ended a pretty horrific relationship I'm finally moving to a safe home that's ours today ❤️❤️❤️ I wouldn't have got thro the last year without quite a lot of people on here, love you loads
#DomesticAbuse
#NewHome
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Just listened to
@fifiglover
&
@janegarvey1
last
#Fortunately
podcast & I'm sobbing. They've been with me thru an horrendous break up, covid & a 2 year severe mental illness relapse, often being the only smile I'd managed in months, thank you so much for everything
#FiandJane
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One whole year without you 💔💔
The world is a better place for having you in it
@BethMatthewsz
but that doesn't stop the endless pain that comes from losing you
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6 years ago today I held my partner as he left this world, it was the most peaceful yet heartbreaking time. He helped me build the life I have today & find the strength to continue without him by myside, he changed my life forever & he is the reason I am who I am today 💗💗💗💗
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I was feeling really overwhelmed and down so my support worker took me to get my nails done & i feel more relaxed
#bipolar
#cptsd
#overwhelmed
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I'm trying really hard to remember that Beth is no longer in physical or mental pain & remember her smiling, so today I did something so that she'll always be with me & helped to raise some money for mental health charities too, huge thank you to
@momma_inks
#RIPBeth
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Laid in bed after having a bath & I've realised that although the day has been v difficult, for the first time in a long time, I haven't had to actively stop myself from acting on suicidal thoughts, it's only 1 day but it's a start & a much needed break from hell
#mentalhealth
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Something exciting happened & now I'm sat on a plane heading to Lanzarote thanks to my amazing mum n dad
#surprise
#sunshine
#hereicome
#recovery
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This time last year I believed I couldn't leave my partner because I wasn't strong enough to survive without him. He told me I would have no one if I left him, that I would be alone forever. I've just booked a weekend away with friends I've met thro swimming
#FuckYouKarl
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When predictive text means you've asked your 17year old son when he's getting laid instead of paid 🤦🤣🤦🤣
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If you think you'd know if a friend was suicidal please take a look at this pic, this is my mask today, I'm not ok but I look ok, please ask, please talk
#mentalhealth
#SuicideAwareness
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I've had an ok day, a lovely visit from a friend and the consultant has taken me off my section, staying unfortunately tho but that's manageable
#mentalhealth
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I'm sorry for the silence, i know a few of you have been worried, I'm safe but have been sectioned this afternoon. Thank you for all the love 😘😘😘😘
#mentalhealth
#mentalillness
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After 10 weeks of care from
@SHSCFT
West HTT I've been discharged back to the care of my CC, the care has been fantastic, I even bought them a present
#mentalhealth
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Feeling overwhelmingly sad and angry for those, & there are thousands, let down by mental health services
#mentalhealth
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Woke up feeling rubbish, wanted to stay in bed and hide but kept telling myself swimming helps, there's only me & the ducks here, it's sunny, windy & rainy but it's bliss & I'm smiling
#mentalhealth
#selfcare
#wildswimming
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@matthaig1
The best thing we can all do with that fellow human is block him, take his platform away
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I'm actually feeling so relieved right now, like I've just grabbed at a little more hope 💖💖 Fantastic organisation & staff at Sheffield arena
#NHS
#OxfordVaccine
#COVID19Vaccine
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Seeing the relief on my counsellor's face this morning when I was dressed & smiling at our zoom meeting has made me a little tearful & feeling cared for 💖💖💖 I'm not sure I would have got thro the past few weeks without her, or you guys 💖💖💖
#selfcare
#mentalhealth
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Ok twitter here's my news.......
I'm going to be a Granny
❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️
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How happy do I look on this. I've actually cried a few times whilst we've been out today, I'm slowly realising the feelings I'm having are happiness & these aren't feelings I'm used to
#selfcare
#mentalhealth
#outdoors
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Today the kids & I drove past a house we've applied for from the council. It's a lovely place where we would feel safe & happy. We won't know for 12 days because of Xmas but please pray or keep everything crossed for us, I can't explain what it would mean to me to get this house
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It's all over, finished, done ❤️❤️
After abuse yesterday he was Mr Charming in front of everyone else today and solicitor never left me alone with him. My brain protected me by being completely numb ❤️❤️
#mentalhealth
#DomesticAbuse
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Fuck Fuck Fuck..........
I have no idea what's happening/happened but I've just looked at this week's housing list and it looks like I actually have a chance of getting one 🙀🙏🤞🏠🙀🙏🤞🏠
#housing
#DomesticViolence
#MentalHealth
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So today was a big step towards trying to move forward a little, my first cold water swim since last Nov (I had been swimming X3 week) It was bloody cold but bloody amazing ❤️❤️
#MentalHealth
#MentalIllnessCanFckOff
#GetTheFckOutside
#BabySteps
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I want to share something with you, this is day 7 of being glad I didn't end my life, this is the longest period of time since at least last May
#babysteps
#mentalhealth
#FckYouMentalIllness
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I'm so anxious about tomoro, if the house is ok it's ours there & then. I've waited 10 months for this, to have a safe home that he doesn't know about, to be able to walk out of my house not worrying whether he'll be around or not. I feel so sick 🤞🤞
#domesticabuse
#mentalhealth
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A very lovely lady made an arrangement for the top of my Grandma's coffin today & then afterwards took it apart and made it in to 9 separate arrangements so we could all bring one home with us ❤️❤️❤️❤️
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After a very, very stressful 24 hours & lots of fighting on my behalf there might be a house that's suitable & I might be able to view it on Fri 🤞🤞🤞
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Twitter friendships are real friendships, today's news has devastated so many of us, please be kind to yourself & others, reach out if you need to, don't think your grief isn't real. In different circumstances she would be tweeting this, she would be there for us
#RIPBeth
💔💔💔
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@afrozefz
@BipolarBlogger
I'm so, so sorry our government & country are behaving like this, I'm ashamed & disgusted
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Depression isn't just feeling sad.
It takes away your ability to carry out even basic tasks such as cleaning your teeth or making a drink, your ability to even smile a little bit when your granddaughter giggles, your ability to have any sort of a life
#mentalhealth
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I've been out with friends tonight, they said I was more myself than I have been for months & months 🤞🤞🤞 I've had a lovely time
#mentalhealth
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Im so grateful to a swimming friend for this afternoon. I'm still really, really struggling but the water, views, company & sunshine provided some much needed respite
#selfcare
#mentalhealth
#therapy
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