Somehow, Wally Joyner turns 60 today. Who was your favorite 1987 rookie? @Angels #HappyBirthday

America stands just a little goddamn taller every time you see one of these sweet bastard displays in a store. You know I’m not lying.

Mike Brady just wanted to get his work done, but here comes another kid with some bullshit problem …

Texans/Lions fans meet-up group tonight. 7pm. Shady Acres Depression and Anxiety support center. Browns fans welcome.

Today we mourn the sudden passing of Jaylen Allen. Our hearts go out to the Allen family during this extremely difficult time. He will be greatly missed.

⁦@DawsAngeles⁩ ⁦@adamcarolla⁩ ⁦@BaldBryan⁩ ⁦@chrislaxamana⁩ ⁦@GinaGrad⁩ With all the Karen Carpenter talk lately.. check her out!

Happy Rex Manning Day to the ‘90s teens and the ‘90s teens only.

#Texans fans just wanting our team to be normal, drama-free and competent

#BobcatsWin @TxStateBaseball put up a 12 (yes 12) spot on Rice in the 4th inning to propel them to a 16-5 victory. #EatEmUp

We got Jeremy Piven on tomorrow's @AdamCarollaShow He's an interesting dude and a compelling interview. You will dig. Manana.

1 year a ago tonight, my band @TheSmokinKills played the last show in LA. When live music comes back, please go see a band. Pay the cover. Buy a cd. Dance your ass off.

I owe Santa $3.95 for the @HoustonTexans vehicle decal he brought me for Christmas. Too embarrassed to drive around with it on there. #texanshame

Ok Texas friends, be honest. How many of you have used a kitchen spatula to wipe the snow off your windshield because you don’t own a proper ice-scrapper....??

This weather is some trash. #winterstorm2021

2:20 of my life I’ll never get back. 2:20 of some of the worst “accents” I’ve ever heard. 2:20 of more proof why the @HoustonTexans are the laughingstock of the NFL because they still employ @JackEasterby.

I love that they’re putting the shot clock graphic in the arc on @NBA games.

I’ve become obsessed with watching YouTube videos of animals seeing themselves in the mirror and being confused. Cats are the best. They Jump!

Today on Magnum P.I. TS goes undercover as a rodeo cowboy to solve a kidnapper case. Rick and T.C. double as rodeo clowns while Higgins acts a big time bull owner. Magnum also chases the kidnappers who are driving a pickup truck on a horse! And guess what.. Magnum got 'em! 🤚🏽🤯

Outstanding!