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Smitty Profile
Smitty

@JebTheJarhead

Followers
5K
Following
87K
Media
4K
Statuses
79K

Former Jarhead - You've been warned... https://t.co/ni3KYjzHv8

Can’t Get There From Here
Joined September 2014
Don't wanna be here? Send us removal request.
@JebTheJarhead
Smitty
5 years
Remember 2 things when you’re on this page: 1. They’re only jokes. 2. No one gives a fuck about your feelings.
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843
@BlankExpressio1
BlankExpression
3 days
In my old age I've had to give up certain things, and my memory is one of them. - my mom
3
7
83
@DieselBABE20
DieselBabe🌟
3 days
Never in my wildest dreams that I think Would have a business be important enough to advertise on a billboard! 🥹
223
47
1K
@mistrustme1
Fuck it all, Love Molly 💋
3 days
You look like my next mistake
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476
@mariana057
mariana Z
3 days
The fact that “hemorrhoids” aren't called “asteroids” is a major missed opportunity for science, health, and the English language
170
896
8K
@Kica333
Kristen
3 days
I kind of miss when people stood 6ft away from me in public.
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100
1K
@allcanadianmom1
allcanadianmom
3 days
🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣
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12
131
@justamystery_1
Amy 🖤
3 days
Men’s mental health matters, many suffer in silence… they matter.
4
20
85
@24tog
Phillygirl
3 days
This is my last winter up North fight me. I’m done 😭😭😭🥶
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5
326
@MsAshBash420
✨Ms_Ashhole ✨
3 days
104
25
417
@Reeseforsure
Reese
3 days
I’m sorry my dog doesn’t like you, he’s skilled at shunning dark entities 🤍
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111
@WineMummy
BadMummy
3 days
“We unfollowed each other.” -A Twitter memoir.
1
19
65
@EVA24011
✨✨
3 days
I don’t know who needs to hear this but the saying is “Nip it in the bud.” It is not “Nip it in the butt.” You’re welcome.
55
27
304
@EmmaScott
Emma Scott
3 days
"Girl, you're so hot." me: Yeah, but it's a dry heat...
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19
265
@MrsFlowers007
𝔻𝕦𝕤𝕥𝕝𝕒𝕟𝕕 𝔽𝕒𝕚𝕣𝕪𝕥𝕒𝕝𝕖
4 days
84
93
923
@Jane_Doe82
Brunette Bohemian
3 days
Listen. It’s real. I just took a nap and got mad at my guy friend in my dream and yelled at him. He’s about to find out that we’re in a fight.
14
5
109
@ToriTheMom
Tori
3 days
I’m working on myself which is inconvenient for everyone involved
9
36
97
@IntentDreaming
Sweet Vanilla Cream
25 days
Emotional and logical illusions exist too. Optical isn’t the only tricky bitch.
0
2
5
@emily_tweets
Emily ™
3 days
I don’t do drugs anymore, but sometimes I stand up too fast
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25
279
@difficultpatty
your other mom
3 days
I Went to the Bathroom and I’m Skinny Now ~a memoir
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18
151
@___nwahs___
Mama Scar
3 days
My circle is cozy and peaceful, with less drama, fewer conflicts, and more quality time with people I truly enjoy!
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134