Jordan Schmaltz
@J_Swish24
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Couple cups of Joe in @nhl , 1x @TheAhl AllStar, overseas pro, I’m not saying I was good. @LiveInFivePod || Hockey Night In Scottsdale || The People’s Insider 📞
Verona, WI
Joined January 2011
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It’s so sick that it’s public knowledge that Brayden Point used to hack darts 🚬 on the back patio deck with his billet dad in Moose Jaw Saskatchewan while playing for the Warriors. Like imagine just having a smoke with your billet dad after a Saturday night win against the Swift
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Folks, now I don’t know everything. But this looks like a squad that loves each other. A Ferda level that can’t be taught. Look at Fishy (golden) corralling the fellas on the bench after a huge George W in Toronto. The
#LGRW
spent most of the day on the tarmac trying to get to TO
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I watched Juraj Slafkovsky play last night at Mullet Arena. And even dating back to the 2021-22 season in the Finnish Pro League where I played against this kid. Not much has changed with his game. At the time I remember thinking.. He’s built like a Ford F250 for his age, he
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The ole bailout but make it look like you’re competing. Classic. I used to do this myself from time to time. Not trying to hate on the fella Mitchie Sheets $$ but you ain’t gonna win anything playing with a parachute on your back at this time of year that’s just faxx.
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🚨🚨Hearing Matt Dumba has been traded to Tampa Bay
- The People’s 📞📞
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Man you love to see it. Real life again? All is well in Texas folks 👍👍
#OpeningDay
Below is the *first* full capacity crowd (40,000 people) at an American sports event since the
#COVID19
pandemic hit. The Texas
#Rangers
are currently the only team among all 4 major pro sports in America to allow full capacity.
#OpeningDay
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Brad Treliving it’s almost time to get on the horn with long time player agent of Mitchie Marner fella..
Hey Darren Ferris. Give me 10 teams. Let’s get this done by the draft.
#LeafsForever
#PackYourShit
-📞📞
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Folks, I love the
@WholeFoods
that have a bar. Sneaky good spot to watch a match. Hit the hot bar, keep it light and tight. Post up. Even if you end up sliding into one you feel good about it because at the end of the day you’re boozing at Whole Foods. Gotta think the married
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Troy Stecher is a helluva sneaky pick up for
#LetsGoOilers
.. dude is like 5’9 standing on a phonebook. Plays like he’s 7 feet. Heart of a lion and a fierce competitor. I love the move. Oilers fans .. Watch him get back to pucks .. he’s first touch all day no matter who is
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Certainly surprising to the outside for sure. But here’s the thing… Ronny Franchise Francis is going to make a helluva effort to bring in his boy Rod The Bod who is coaching
#CauseChaos
on an expiring deal currently with no contract extension in place. My guess Seattle throws
Hearing the Seattle Kraken are making a coaching change. Dave Hakstol will be out.
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I can’t stop watching this. Probably watched it 100 times. Styles just giving it to Mitchie Gritty Marner. Lol.
Stop fckn crying bro. This isn’t fckn junior.
😂😂😂😂
Styles is a cocksman
-📞📞
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Somebody booed at you George ? Holy vanilla soft serve fella.
George Russell admits he has struggled to come to terms with the abuse from fans that comes with the job of being an F1 driver.
🗣 "In Montreal, I had somebody shout my name and boo at me"
#F1
#Motorsport
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Contrary to belief. You’re assuming only girls wear skirts? That wouldn’t be very 2024 of you. I was in LA a few months ago and saw a few dudes sporting a nice pleather skirt. Not that it matters or I give a shit how anyone dresses but let’s just relax here fella.
All good.
The open sexism here just can’t be part of a head coach’s vernacular.
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🚨BREAKING NEWS🚨
Folks, nothing urgent over here. .but as The People’s Insider 📞 I have to report that Bob Gucci aka
@heatdaddy69420
is currently making out with our waitress at an undisclosed restaurant in Buffalo New York. I must say, I’ve never seen a game of tonsil hockey
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Isn't it obvious? For the girls!
#CawledgeHawkey
RIP 🙏🏼🙏🏼
The actor who played Ralph Cox, Kenneth Mitchell, passed away Saturday at the age of 49 after a 5-year battle with ALS.
#ALSucks
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🚨Folks, Binnington is better than at least 4 guys on this list, no disrespect.
- The People’s 📞
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Some places have the worlds largest skyscrapers.. At Und we have the worlds largest deuce
#Dumpandchange
http://t.co/AaNFpcCA1n
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🚨🚨Hearing Joel Edmundson has been traded to Toronto.
The People’s 📞📞
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When Robby Fabbri first came in the league back in 2015-16 with the St. Louis Blues as a 19 year old, he was their best player in playoffs. A team that went to the Western Conference Finals. (I watched this fella torch it from the press box as a pigeon black ace).
He ended up
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Hey Buddy. Shirts doctored up, rushed ordered. Design costs. Paying my website guy to throw it up and edit it. Sweat equity of running around the west valley to pick these shirts up in west Buckeye Tuesday night from north Scottsdale because I’m fckn Ferda so the
#Yotes
faithful
Capitalizing off a fan base getting their team moved
Let’s square up at the global ambassador next time you’re there
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Hearing Matt Dumba will not dress tonight for
#Yotes
pending other injuries. Standy ..
- The People’s 📞📞
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Venmo is one of the sneakier funny social media apps to check. It honestly might be my
#1
seed right now. I love checking the timeline and seeing your high school buddy getting charged from his wife for groceries and a car wash. (34.65$ his share). Haven’t you guys been married
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It’s such a Fernando Rodney type Friday night fella
@DanyAllstar15
.. You show up to the bar and cock your flat brim 59fitty straight west (left) and deliver nothing but fast ball after fast ball until you can’t see straight. It’s time to hit the gas folks. Good luck out there 👍
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Man I can't imagine the bender the entire state of ND would go on if the Sioux Boys win tonight. Get it done baby
@thisisnick_09
#RollTribe
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A for the people message- Joe Blacks GF ND is always a great place to tie one on. Hearing the final horn is what it’s all about 👍 Help them advance in the Barstool best bar Bracket
@BarstoolUND
#BarstoolJoeBlacks
#BarstoolBestbar
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Cmon man. Let’s find a way to get the good people of Helsinki back in the stands safely and promptly
@MarinSanna
@smliiga
The fellas NEED the fans !! 🙏🏼🙏🏼😥
#PackTheNordis
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🚨Folks, update out of the
@ArizonaCoyotes
siblings trip. Nicky Ferda bingo’d in music city. Shortly after Kylie Schmaltz shotguns a beer. Just all time stuff !!
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The FCKN DESERT DAWGS BABY !! Down 4 Cobb. It don’t matter. Fuck it. Grab your wrench and go to work. This team is unreal !!
@ THE ICONIC MULLET BABY IS ROCKIN
SO FERDA
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I’m so choked
#Canucks
didn’t sign Philly Ferda Kessel to a
#SPC
prior to the deadline. Brings a tear to my eye that falls down to my chin thinking about how all he wanted was
#OneLastDance
.. Dudes made close to 100 sheets on the 200 x 85 and still was firmly okay with boot
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🚨Folks,
#VegasBorn
Kelly McCrimmon from Plenty, Sask is up to something. There is more things in the works off The Las Vegas Strip. I can’t confirm what it is yet… but he’s cooking like a young Bobby Flay right now.
Standby
- The People’s 📞📞
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#TappedIn
Live from the Bun Lounge and Casino in beautiful Grand Forks, North Dakota.
Thank you veterans for our freedom 👍🫡
The
@heatdaddy69420
in Vegas of The North
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I just saw Nick Schmaltz at a Hooters in Glendale, AZ. Said he’s staying put until further notice.
@FriedgeHNIC
#BreakingNews
#TheSource
Just saw Travis Konecny at the Grotto in the Bruce Peninsula National Park and he said he’s traded to Toronto
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🚬🚬🚬
People forget Zubov smoked a full pack of camels between periods then ripped no look tape to tape passes to forwards for 60 mins a game
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Folks,
#Yotes
call up Dylan Guenther former 9th overall pick doesn’t want to go back to the jungle. Goals in back to back games. He is playing like he packed his entire 1 BR apartment up in residential Tucson and said that’s enough of the minors. Momma we staying !! 🗣️🗣️
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🚨🚨BREAKING🚨🚨
Liam O’Brien in Utah just grabbed the mic 🎙️and said …
“My name’s Liam O’Brien. You can call me Spicy Tuna!!” 🍣🍣
Folks, I hate to say it. I gave him that nickname. All time !! 😂😂
Per the source.
-📞📞
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Mullett Mega Bowl. Mullett Mega Bowl. Mullett Mega Bowl. Wednesday. April 17th. Wednesday. April 17th. 7 o’clock. Pacific Standard. Be there. Bring your chin. If you don’t have a ticket. Fuck it. Just show up. We’re showing the fellas the support they need leaving the sheet post
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Darren let’s be honest fella , nobody has a clue what they are doing at this point.
Feel for the kids.. brutal.
IIHF medical group would be the leading edge on this. I’m sure there will be an explanation.
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Folks, The
#Iconic
Mullet Arena is so filth. It’s like watching your two best buddies duke it out in the backyard at 3am. It’s always a cage fight no matter the night. It gives me 2009 Kimbo Slice YouTube video fight vibes. What a match tonight. Ingram was disgusting in the dying
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#Swishs
’ phone is buzzing late night in the desert …pending a last minute change of heart. It is believed Patrick Kane will sign with the
@DetroitRedWings
within the next 3-7 business days. Term is still being hashed out. 1 or 2 years makes most sense.
#NHL
#Showtime
#Fella
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Waking up after The Mega Bowl is like a bum looking for a needle outside of a Circle K. You can’t replace that type of high. What a game. What a fan base. Once the game ended you could feel the shift of emotions. From excitement to full on sadness. It was weird. The life
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You a long way from Hoboken homeboyyy. Embrace the culture of
@UNDmhockey
and the good people of North Dakota will love you. Gimme a text when you get wheels down on the tarmac of GFK International. Ever flown into an airport with 2 gates? It’s so legendary.
The Bun Lounge and
Headed to the Ralph this weekend. What are some things i need to check out in Grand Forks? Also what are some things you want to see from this episode of ChicletsU?
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🚨🚨Folks just spoke with
@heatdaddy69420
we have some BIG NEWS to report. Pending a physical and the contract papers being submitted to the league office prior to 5pm Eastern tomorrow ..
Hockey Night In Scottsdale has inked veteran podcast producer and content guru
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Awesome Week up in Grand Forks, ND aka The Wild West for The 1st annual Sioux Pro Camp. Always the best time hangin w your boys before the season starts!! Thanks for having us
@UNDmhockey
@BradBerry29
#PlayItBack
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🚨Folks, It still stings just as much as it did when it happened. Quite possibly the only shot I blocked all year resulted in the GWG with .6 seconds left. I won’t sugarcoat it - I hate the Gophers. Rau in my ear chirping. Actually heard he’s a good dude. Wish I would’ve suckered
10 years ago i screamed so loud in my dorm room the ra came and checked on me
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Hey
#LeafsForever
fans… People’s Insider here 📞📞.. hearing some good news regarding Willy Styles Nylander regarding his availability for game
#2
. 👀👀
Standby as there are still some hurdles to work thru.
- 📞📞
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Bigger smile than I saw playing 3 years for you Coach.Normally just staring thru my soul!!
#lLLBlockThatShotNextTime
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Thanks for having us. It was special to visit with all the kids and help try to put a smile on their faces during difficult times. All the best to everyone
@ShrinersStLouis
Keep fightin Kids 👊🏼👊🏼and Happy Holidays 🎅🏻
Thank you to
@StLouisBlues
players
@zachsanford21
and
@J_Swish24
for visiting our patients yesterday!
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🚨For the folks wondering and who don’t have tickets to the match that’s ok. Just show up post game at the corner of Packard & E Rio Salado at roughly 9:30pm outside the arena. Line the streets. Bring a good attitude and a smile. Let’s send the fellas off accordingly in a
Mullett Mega Bowl. Mullett Mega Bowl. Mullett Mega Bowl. Wednesday. April 17th. Wednesday. April 17th. 7 o’clock. Pacific Standard. Be there. Bring your chin. If you don’t have a ticket. Fuck it. Just show up. We’re showing the fellas the support they need leaving the sheet post
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Does Pierre Luc-Douchebois even like playing hockey? This guy barely has a pulse every time I watch him.
#GoKingsGo
#LetsGoOilers
- 📞📞
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Appreciate the credit my friend.
- The People’s 📞📞
Indeed. Joel Edmundson has been traded to the Maple Leafs, confirmed
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🚨🚨Folks, this just in.
I’m not one to body shame. But sometimes you just have to appreciate a solid barrel, especially on one of the greatest QB’s to ever lace them up. Look at that gluten stuffed mid section. Did Patty Ferda Mahomeboy swallow an airbag? That is so sick. He’s
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I’ve been saying this to anyone who will listen for the last 3-4 years+ and even this year it still stands. At age 36, if I need a center to win me a game 7 for a Stanley Cup I’m still taking Sidney Crosby over Connor McJesus. And I feel like that shouldn’t even be that big of a
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Alicia Ferda Keys is still so hot. She has an absolute dump truck. All in.
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When
@heatdaddy69420
and I go back to St. Louis for our live Hockey Night In Scottsdale show
@WheelhouseSTL
I fully expect a video tribute from
@StLouisBlues
at this rate.
43 games. 5 apples. No tucks. -7. 12 PIMS. 25th overall 2012 though. How the hell are ya.
#1stRoundNuffin
Who is the king of the tribute videos? What has been the most ridiculous one with the least amount of games??
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Folks, boots on the ground in Calgary, all in. 🚨🚨This just in- It is confirmed a
Kentavious Caldwell-Pope (KCP) playing with an ankle bracelet in The Association kinda night. Restricted curfew, home by a decent hour, strictly business. This is a work trip.
#HNIS
🌵🏒
Low and
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Thanks to the good people
@TheRedPepper
for always being there no matter what area code you’re in!! Folks if you’re anywhere in the continental United States they will deliver 👍
#Placeisalltime
#PlatinumMember
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Turned in a final paper for one of my classes The topic was to define diversity so I started it off the way it should
http://t.co/J0WwSWeDDL
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Channeling in my best Austin Powers...one would say the Sioux were a force in fargo...this weekend.. Haha woooo baby
#ShippingoffBoston
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I used to wheel so hard to Usher at Verona Area High School “mixers” in 9th grade held at Wildcat Lanes. Bumping, grinding, juking, and putting my tongue places it probably shouldn’t be for a 14 year old getting dropped off at this type of event by my mom. All in.
Smirnoff in a
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Kelly Sutherland stop sucking on your whistle
#NoDiddy
holy fakkk fella lets the boys play !!
#NYR
#ALLCAPS
@ScoutingTheRefs
- The People’s 📞📞
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🚨🚨Folks, good evening hope you’re doing well. The People’s Insider phone is buzzing 📞📞at this rate it’s the Arizona Coyotes Vs Everybody.
The Desert Dawg faithful has a message for the rest of The National..
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Folks, I can’t stop thinking about what
Grand Forks is like right now after that big sweep from
@UNDmhockey
dusting off Denver like it ain’t no thang. Thanks for coming fellas, the Sioux boys just took you straight to the cleaners !!
The can’t miss 3 leg parlay of the night.
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It’s such a Mo Wanchuk type Wednesday. You get drunk mid day at the bar, you’re snapping it crispy back with old buddies during the holidays & all the sudden u plan a trip to Miami in June that u won’t remember tomorrow, toasting to the sunshine state
#FLA
#Snatch
@DanyAllstar15
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When life gives you lemons...
You order
@TheRedPepper
!! The Grinder cures all Folks 👌🏼
#SoIGotThatGoing4me
#WhichIsNice
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Folks friendly reminder: Head over to the
@SiouxShop
to grab your limited edition Evan “The Ruppa” Trupp shirzy. All proceeds will go to Evan in effort to help fight his current battle with Hodgkin’s Lymphoma. This guy is a Sioux LEGEND. Lets help the fella out !!
#NailGunET19
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🚨Folks, couple high end National Leaguers sharing a meal last night in Toronto. Aside from both rocking Butter Swag..
Fun Fact? These two guys were on a line together grooving up playing for the Chicago Mission. The other fella on that line.. Christian Dvorak !!
They won a few
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You along way from Hoboken homeboyyy. Embrace the culture of
@UNDmhockey
and the good people of North Dakota will love you. Gimme a text when you get wheels down on the tarmac of GFK International. Ever flown into an airport with 2 gates? It’s so legendary.
The Bun Lounge and
Headed to the Ralph this weekend. What are some things i need to check out in Grand Forks? Also what are some things you want to see from this episode of ChicletsU?
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Chief Berube is such a good dude. And that’s coming from a kid that was cocky and thought as a first round pick, I “deserved” more playing for him at the AHL / NHL level levels. One of the best coaches in hockey + a certified nail gun! Calls it like he sees it and develops young
Berube on Kyrou with
@andystrickland
right now on
@590TheFan
: "That's tough. I don't think he meant anything by his comments. It's hard, and I feel for him. Getting boo'ed like that isn't easy on anybody."
#STLBlues
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Folks, I’d take Chuck McAvoy over Quinn Hughes and Adam Fox any day of the week.
#NHLBRUINS
-📞📞
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🚨Folks, everyone talking about what a feat Connor McJesus accomplished last night with
#LetsGoOilers
grabbing his 100 stack of apples. Does the rest of the hockey world know Nikita Kucherov has 99 assists and will probably get to the 100 marker tomorrow. Feel like the Russian
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Hooters West Phoenix is sneaky good. Solid bar. Solid scenery. Plus, in case your date doesn’t go as planned you may have a few other options.
Veteran tip 👍
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TBT The only 3 on 0 Ive ever seen Seconds after this pic was taken 15 went ISO yet to bury it into the goalies chest
http://t.co/WY49l3pYQy
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Still waiting for
#Leafsforever
D-Man Simon Benoit to use this defensive tactic in a National League game at Scotia Bank Arena. Imagine being that confident you don’t need your twig. That’s like dropping your gun in war and trusting your hand on hand combat on the frontline. So
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Folks the scouting report on Davey Ayers (being I shoot on him 2-3 times a week). Definitely has an old school “Stand Up” playing style, decent glove from outside the blue and has elite patience with the pill as advertised
#NationalLeague
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#InsiderSwish
It is believed this piece of land is in and around the Desert Ridge area. A place the Coyotes have been targeting for the last few months while doing their due diligence in east Mesa. For the folks familiar with the Valley .. Desert Ridge is on the north side of
Not sure commissioner Bettman or the Arizona Coyotes will expand on this today. As mentioned last night on
@TSNHockey
, the Coyotes are finalizing the purchase of a piece of land in Phoenix for an arena build. They’re hoping to announce project plans next month.
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CBS. Not even close. Clutch gene x3. Good chins. Caggiula threw both ways. Boeser tucked. Nicky iced it.
It’s not even close.
I’ll hang up now.
- The People’s 📞
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🚨Folks, couple clicks (not too many) 🫰🫰 for Nicky Ferda playing in his 500th National League Tilt tonight against
#VegasBorn
543 games between us. Not bad eh fella. Keep that chin tucked.
Low and Slow
The People’s 📞📞 is Boots 🥾🥾 @ The Iconic Mullett
- Uncle Swishy
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Just want to say thanks again to the OG
@BizNasty2point0
for stopping by
#HockeyNightInScottsdale
last night with me and the
@heatdaddy69420
. Biz is such a legend.. The guy did a back 2 back in Atlanta for
@NHL_On_TNT
Tuesday / Wednesday, flew cross country ATL ->> PHX yesterday
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OT winner. Skating to the
#Blackhawks
faithful and screaming at them
🗣️🗣️ “Showtime!! Haha are you kidding me fella. What a legend. Vintage 88
🚨Folks, I know it’s Sunday and Virgil at Morgan Stanley is not in the office today because he’s coaching his daughter’s U10 indoor soccer team and they’ve had a helluva season to date. But this is an emergency. Call him right now and tell him you need whatever you have in your
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Fired up! Congrats to my bro on getting picked by the hawks 20th overall!! Couldn't be happier for the kid!
#boysrgettinginone
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Folks
#Insider
phone is buzzing .. 📞📞
Something to keep an eye on and a situation to monitor. You have to wonder is this the night DJ Smith gets told to get a room at the Wynn and catch a Southwest bird back to Ottawa tomorrow? You never want to see a fella get canned but
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I hate to say it. There’s no way this guy is shooting 107.2. Marty Frk would be pumping out a 122 on that gun. We’re talking twice the legal limit type shit.
Chara and Frk have the biggest piss missiles known to man.
MTL got that gun juiced up like Barry Bonds in 2001.
- The
Arber Xhekaj unloaded a 107.2 mph shot at the
#GoHabsGo
skills competition 💥
The NHL record for hardest shot is 108.8 mph 😳
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Folks, I’ve taken some time to digest the reports out of
#SeaKraken
in particular regarding as to why Dave Hakstol was let go. Some citing that players voiced their thoughts during exit meetings and weren’t fond of the 55 year old out of Warburg, Alberta from a coaching style
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🚨🚨Folks, just had my pre game meal at the
@WholeFoods
bar in N Scottsdale. Little hot bar self serve eh. Stay light. It was buzzing. There was a group of dads there with a couple grocery bags, just bellied up smiling ear to ear. I couldn’t quite make out the whole situation
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Tomorrow on
@LiveInFivePod
the man with a granite chin, the myth, the legend from
@NHL_On_TNT
@BizNasty2point0
on the program !!
**Never Seen or Released 2017 Wet Deck Footage ..
- The People’s 📞📞
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🚨Folks, Does
#VegasBorn
Kelly McCrimmon from Plenty, Sask have the biggest wrench as a GM in The National??
Lol. He just fleeced the entire league.
I wanna work with this guy. Robbing Peter to pay Paul and then piss pumping him and taking more. He doesn’t give a flying f
@kk
.
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Tucked in this game. Eye black on. Tongue out like Two-Three. NBD.
Nothing like a self tire pump and talking in third person.
Stay hot Swishy
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Folks This Just In!!
🚨🚨BREAKING NEWS🚨🚨
Wednesday @ The Iconic Mullett will be a WHITE OUT ⚪️⚪️
Please come dressed head to toe in all white errrthang like you’re playing in a center court match at Wimbledon.
Hockey Night In Scottsdale will be 🥾🥾’s for the last ever
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Folks, one of the sneakier places to wheel might be the
@UPS
store in North Scottsdale. I’ve been here for 5 minutes patiently waiting my turn and sweet Jesus there’s been at least 6-7 Bob McKenzie “A-Rated” like prospects walk in. We’re talking about certified Maurice Richards
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