Sir Noel Jesus KBE
@HisHolyLord
Followers
4K
Following
122K
Media
31
Statuses
666
Piss Sensei. Moonraker is the best Bond film. I put metal in the microwave (perfectly safe). Knighted for services to tweets.
Pissy, France
Joined July 2017
This video looks ok on my phone but X has turned it to mush.
1
0
2
The real perpetrators of this whole grok affair are women who opted to grow breasts. THEY DISGUST ME.
1
0
5
Sex is bad and wrong and tits are the devil's dumplings. BAN TITS
3
0
4
Watching the first batman film, and Bruce wayne drinks lovely 80s bottle of la piat dor with Vicky Vale. Probably bought it out of threshers.
2
0
4
DELETE THIS
1
0
5
Literally exhausted with all the fingering I've been doing today.
5
0
8
Getting a few ticks on the plus column in before the big purge.
0
0
1
I think sir Keir starmer is doing a terrific job. Keep it up sir keir!
4
0
9
I would never go on television to talk about my micropenis.
3
0
8
THAT IS NOT ME
@HisHolyLord was medically diagnosed with a 0.38-inch micropenis. While the UK average is 5.2 inches, Sir Noel Jesus is using his story to challenge stigma, boost body confidence, and help other men feel less alone. https://t.co/5RKHpR1EVv via @FacebookWatch
3
0
13
Since x is getting banned in airstrip one, you might as well suck me off before I'm gone.
2
0
7
My pheromonal musk is strong and pungent today, sexy ladies of twitter.
4
0
7
How is a man supposed to maintain his pheremonal musk, and drive women crazy, if he starts washing his bum crack?
When I'm feeling particularly down about my ex I have to remind myself that I had to beg him to wash his bum, and that meant WITH SOAP, not just letting the water run through the crack.
1
0
4
Not me actually.
@HisHolyLord has always been fond of a pearl necklace (note the figure on the wall of a little man trying to escape).
1
0
9
The yanks are smashing the yoinking game over the last couple of weeks.
1
0
1
🚨🇺🇸🇻🇪🇷🇺 U.S. TRIES TO SEIZE VENEZUELAN OIL TANKER, SO RUSSIA RESPONDS WITH A SUBMARINE You thought this was just about oil? It’s now a full-on naval showdown. The U.S. is actively trying to seize the Marinera, a Russian-flagged tanker (formerly Bella 1) carrying sanctioned
1
0
2