Isaac
@GalaxyPeaBrain
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Adam Levine drama is boring, but finding out he sexts like he's 17 and hasn't ever fucked is funny
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Ten years ago retail workers were hit with 15 psychological 9/11s.
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"I hope Joe Biden lives in shame of his horrific Legacy". Joe Biden's thoughts:
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> Dr. Disrespect loading up Fortnite .> Gets stream sniped .> User has name Dr_AgeofConsent.> Loads up Warzone .> Gets killed by user Dr_EpsteinsIsland.> Loads up Elden Ring.> Gets invaded by Dr_DivorcedPedophile
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Shamiek Moore is going to walk into that recording booth in a year and a Sony lawyer is going to tell him he's been re-casted with Awkwafina.
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NOW - Biden: "And now I want to hand it over to the President of Ukraine. ladies and gentlemen, President Putin."
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The funniest part about this making more money than God at this rate, is how much funnier the headlines in 5 years when all the other Mattel projects announced either get scrapped or bomb terribly.
‘BARBIE’ is estimated to pass $1 billion by the end of this weekend. Read our review:
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Fantastic now every video can look like a Vox video titled "Why Oreos double stuffed is actually killing us".
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"So how was growing up in L.A like?" . Billie: "What is you talmbout".
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JK Rowling: "What do we do?". The mold in her home:
J.K. Rowling and Elon Musk Named in Cyberbullying Lawsuit Filed by Algerian Boxer Imane Khelif After Olympic Win (EXCLUSIVE)
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Getting shot by them and police finding a shell casings that says "Meep".
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Reporter: "do it or no balls". Admin passing a 600% tarrif tomorrow:
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Justin Trudeau: "Well there goes my chance to run again, not like I can change who I-". The shoe polish under Trudeau's bed:
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TRUMP: WE NEED TREMENDOUS ELECTRICITY.
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Did not understand the appeal of Fortnite until I got a 9-5 job that beats me down mentally. Turn my brain off by watching Goku fight Peter Griffin? Don't mind if I do.
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Do you know how racist/evil you have to be against Arab people for the French gov to say you are going too far?.
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Replying to a work email with "Thank you!" When I'm not thankful at all
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Girlfriend saw me hover over the Sydney Sweeney pics a second too long
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COD Sweats: stuck in a hell of their own creation. Forever doomed to play a game that angers them . 35 year old dad that plays on weekends: Sucks shit, camps, and is having a blast.
Your 22 kill streak can end by a person sitting in a stairwell silent as a rat with God level artificial reaction time and tracking that can only be comparable to aimbot lmao. I love it
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"You said you only smoke high grade shit and moon rocks. Yet you have been quiet for the past 2 hours after smoking the mids I gave you? Care to respond?"
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2015 FDA Announcement: "Hey avoid some of this tuna it might be poison if it's from lot number-" . 2026 FDA Announcement:
FDA is making plans to end routine food safety inspections — CBS News.
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Still thinking about how that X Men movie said JFK died bc he was a mutant in one line then just never elaborated on that for the rest of the film.
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It is 2004, the Internet discusses why 23 year old Scott Pilgrim is dating a 17 year old. It is 2010, the Internet discusses why 23 year old Scott Pilgrim is dating a 17 year old. It is 2023, the Internet discusses why 23 year old Scott Pilgrim is dating a 17 year old
The Scott Pilgrim Netflix anime discourse has begun, as fans discuss how the character is 23 dating a 17 year old
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87 year old Ian McKellen during Secret Wars after The Russos ask him to do another take talking to a tennis ball:
87 year old Patrick Stewart during Secret Wars after The Russos ask him to do another take talking to a tennis ball:
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Same cinematographer
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My mimic tear ash not attacking the boss that's currently pummeling me:
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Japan court dissolves controversial 'Moonies' church
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The children yearn for DVD Extras, Commentary tracks, and interactive menus where there's a secret button on the menu screen.
Universal is “working to replenish” stock after the 4K UHD copies of ‘OPPENHEIMER’ sold out almost instantly.
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My college roommate trying to get me to go to the bars after I took too many dab hits
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Every time I find a comic book artist pre-1999 drawing thick women I start standing up from my chair and saluting the panel like it's a veteran.
"Layouts: john buscema" yeah more like rub outs this guy was cranking off when he drew this shit!!!!!!
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Boss makes a dollar i feel nothing inside that's why I disassociate on company time.
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Eric Adams right now:
NEW YORK (AP) — New York City's police commissioner says he is resigning after his phone was seized as part of a federal investigation.
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Group of 6 year olds: "Oh boy I love Willy Wonka I'm so excited for-" . The Unknown crawling from behind a mirror:
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Everyone is waiting for the Rotten Tomatoes score of Oppenheimer and Barbie, but I'm waiting for which film gets the first review that matters:. Hideo Kojima tweeting "Wow 👍😍🫶"
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"Ah man, my mom packed me celery sticks and a sandwich. What did you get?". 3rd grader opening up their Lunchly:
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"I am increasing the install size. Pray I do not increase it any further."
Star Wars Jedi: Survivor's install size has increased from 130GB to 155GB.
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"if Marx were alive he-".Bro why not think about if Goku were alive today? That would be sick.
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We were robbed of the horniest Sam Rami film known to man.
Anne Hathaway says she was originally cast as Black Cat in Sam Raimi's 'Spider-Man 4' before the film was scrapped . via @Variety
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CNN moderator: "What would you-". Biden: Foaming at the mouth after a bad reaction to his vyvanse cocktail . Trump: Zoom call from prison lagging . RFK JR: "I actually know a lot of pedophiles. I mean not closely. Just by name. Well I have their cell phone numbers too!".
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"Oh hey a new game from Japan I wonder what-" . Video game reviewers from 1995 to 2010:
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It is 1997, a new generation of gamers learns what a Bethesda game is. It is 2008 a new generation of gamers learns what a Bethesda game is. It is 2015 a new generation of gamers learns what a Bethesda game is. It is 2023 a new generation of gamers learns what a Bethesda game is
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My Job at the CIA is to hit a red button labeled "DoorDash Post" every 2 months for $87k annual salary.
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The CIA agent preparing to bestow the Washington Post with the highest honor a US journalist can receive
A Washington Post investigation has found no proof of a Hamas command center under al-Shifa Hospital following Israel’s attack on the medical complex. More:
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The plan? We give everyone on the platform verified status for $8, leading to millions in advertising contracts being lost. But we get to keep all of the $200 we gain from new verified accounts.
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"How can I improve my cooking skills?" . Reddit: ummm methinks it was too hot in the kitchen for someone. Quora: Practice , avoid getting divorced that where it went down hill for me . [1/50]. Google A.i search result: Leave the gas burners on over night and kill any witnesses.
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> Devalue the company by removing billions of dollars worth of Branding.> Do nothing to entice advertisers.>Make up debt by having subscriptions and taking cut of transactions by turning this into a banking app.>Get put in a barrel by Saudi Royal crown investors.
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It's very funny that one of the big icons of nerd culture is a walking Chad meme that knocks books out of nerds' hands.
Harrison Ford on if he will turn into Red Hulk in ‘CAPTAIN AMERICA: BRAVE NEW WORLD’:. “What is a red Hulk?”. (Source:
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Sony: "Kojima you can't keep flying out your idols and friends to scan in your games. It's causing our budget to balloon." . Kojima:.
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Sober - no drinking. California sober- no drinking but smoke weed still. Midwest Sober- occasional shower beer, beer after a long day, if you need to drive, and just a beer when you're in the mood.
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David Hogg: "We need younger members in-". The DNC:
U.S. Rep. Gerry Connolly (D-VA) has died.
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Kevin Feige and the rest of Disney higher ups are going to hell man. What the hell are you doing with all that money
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FDA 2015: "Probably should cut down on eating lunch meats for every meal and avoid taking-". FDA 2025:
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Jill Biden is urging 'depressed' Joe to 'burn the whole thing down' in their final days — Mail.
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White people chuckling softly to a podcast when they're alone in the car.
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Sony executive two days earlier waking up hungover in an alley: "Madame Web lost HOW MUCH?".
All 8 live-action ‘SPIDER-MAN’ movies will officially return to theaters this year. Starting with Sam Raimi’s ‘SPIDER-MAN’ on April 15.
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FKA twigs and Bill Skarsgård in ‘THE CROW.’. In theaters August 23.
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Do 30 year olds go on Ice-cream dates? Cells. >Cells. Is Oppenheimer leftist? Cells. >Cells. Ice cream ice cream yum yum yum. Cells. >Cells. I look so odd with the old filter. Interlinked .>Interlinked . Having some girl dinner. Interlinked. >interlinked
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"Bodybuilders debate how many days are in a week" by Bodybuilding Forum (2008)
y’all what is a painting or other work of visual art that never fails to destroy you every time you see it because BOY I’ll start:
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Despite the "PlayStation has no games" meme it is incredible that Sony's only competition is Nintendo because Microsoft is addicted to chewing on cyanide tablets.
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Pre-2005 famous people would get a stalker that'd make the news and it was an event. Now if you're signed to a major label or have more than 10k followers you will attract hundreds of Bjork stalkers that are confused why you don't appreciate it when they try to find your home.
Chappell Roan talks about the mistreatment she’s been receiving from fans:. “I don’t care that abuse and harassment and stalking is a normal thing to do to people who are famous or a little famous…That does not make it okay. That does not make it normal.”
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The last thing I see before police deports me to El Salvador's r/Dachau for calling my government mandated Cybertruck "kinda gay looking"
TRUMP SUGGESTS TESLA ATTACKERS COULD BE SENT TO EL SALVADOR CAMPS.
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"Hey can you guys just run on healthcare at the bare minimum, I think that would-" . The DNC:
Democrats to spend millions to learn how to speak to 'American Men' and win back the working class — Independent.
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Realizing that Back to back dementia means we are all trapped in the eternal Brandon Void
Trump lashes out against "fake polls" as his approval ratings sink and suggests news outlets publishing them should be "investigated for election fraud" — Axios.
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Bloodborne fans currently planning a Final Fantasy 7 style bombing mission after seeing this screenshot.
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"Jesus Christ honey what point of RECESSION DO YOU NOT GET! WE CAN LOSE THE FUCKING HOUSE". 9 year old bursting into the room to show their parents the new dance they invented:
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You could convince a third of this website's user base that their shadow is sentient.
Imagine being a boomer growing up. Every massive chain restaurant was new and exciting, instead of depressing. You could go to Pizza Hut and celebrate the dream of capitalism with your community.
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Rachel McAdams having a panic attack in an economy class seat . Cillian Murphy in the seat next to her:
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Jimmy Carter: "Before I go may I ask will I see -". Grim reaper:
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The funniest video of 2013.
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"Where the fuck are these ants coming from?". The twizzler under my bed since highschool:
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Trying to order food over the phone as the least drunk member of the friend group :
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"Scientists are calling it 'The 4 beers after work' Diet. And it's known to cure everything"
Small amounts of alcohol may turn down stress in the brain, benefiting the heart, new study finds
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Girlfriend saw me accidentally lose my cool after I got killed in Fortnite
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Disney and Warner Brothers: we need to think carefully how to release these upcoming films that aren't testing well to make sure that in terms of returns we-. SONY six beers deep behind the wheel: hey check this dog shit out.
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Expanding famous images using AI. 🪄. (Photoshop generative fill)
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Senior citizens when the online form asks "Re-Enter Email Address to confirm"
BREAKING: DOGE is considering no longer letting senior citizens file Social Security claims over the phone, and requiring them to do it online or in person.
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This flashed in every Knicks fans eyes when Tyrese hit the choke emote:
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Dragon Ball Z Linkin Park AMVs need to be preserved now more than ever . The future must know their roots
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