Emily Dreyfuss
@EmilyDreyfuss
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Writer. Editor. Gesticulator. Co-author of Meme Wars with brilliant @bostonjoan . Director of @shorensteinctr News Lab. Substack: SCREENSICK.
San Francisco, CA
Joined May 2009
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"Screensick," adjective, coined by my 5yo to mean "the feeling when you watch screens too much and it makes you unable to act normally or have good behavior"
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there's a kid annoying his exhausted mother in the row next to me on a small plane right now so I asked him, "Have you ever thought about how weird it is that sounds existed for billions of years before ears evolved to hear them?" and now he's looking quietly out the window.
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Guy at the hardware store sized me up at checkout and said, “You look like someone who likes jeans. There’s a documentary on PBS next week you’ll enjoy about the history of jeans.”
Nailed it.
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Warning: If I tell you “next week I’ll be less busy” please remind me this has never been true. This mythical next week does not arrive, it just hovers out of frame, a fantasy of time and space where I’ll be able to say yes to plans, receding into the distance as I reach for it
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Two year old woke up screaming last night.
Me, running in: what’s wrong honey?
Him, still dreaming: I can’t make the soup! I’m just a baby!
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I am in awe of the bravery of the Times journalists tweeting their opposition to the publication of that op-ed. This is against the paper’s social media rules, and it’s a terrifying time to be putting your job on the line to take a stand as a journalist, but they are doing it.
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Schooled by toddler
3yo: Why can't babies cry inside their mommies tummies?
Me: Cuz babies can't make sounds until they are born
3yo: Why?
Me: (trying to rush out the door) I don't know
3yo: Why don't you know?
Me: Cuz I'm not a scientist
3yo: You're a journalist. You could ask
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Email openings of 2021:
Hi, hope you had a good break before the insurrection!
Hope you're hanging in there!
Hope you're surviving ~gestures wildly at all this~!
Sorry to bother you as democracy crumbles, but wanted to follow up on the capitalist work that we must keep doing
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@TwitterComms
@oliverdarcy
Now that this rule is so public, you might want to get a team to go through and remove all the “I hope Obama dies” that are still up on the site, along with threats to Clinton, etc., not to mention against so many women whose names I couldn’t search individually
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it's really not fair that the big boat is unstuck while the rest of us are just left here, sitting in our eternal stuckness
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"Silence them with science," to the tune of she blinded me with science 🪩
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My son has been trying to get me to stop working all day, first by begging, then by promising a party when I stop. But he just came to me in tears and said he doesn't actually know how to plan a party, and since I'm too busy to help, the party is cancelled.
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This is amazing, and I hope she isn't grounded for life. The replacement parents part is my fave. When my Dad was MIA in my childhood, he was doing moralistic Honda commercial voiceovers so whenever a Honda ad would come on my brothers and I would yell "Daily dose of parenting!"
this tiktok of sofia coppola’s daughter… this means so much to me
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*whispers* I realize the discourse is too far gone at this point, but if you’re describing Redditors as far-right teenagers who don’t have sex you’re very much out of step with who uses that site and how Reddit communities have developed over the last years
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I want content creators to get paid and I want journalists to get paid, but I don't want every high-quality piece of information to be behind a paywall
especially when misinformation is free
the question of how to square that circle is going to be a big one for our industry
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This is like when people on Facebook used to write: I hereby declare that Facebook cannot use my data or invade my privacy
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I can’t believe I’m writing this, but I want to confirm I was one of the people laid off at Protocol today. To say I’m heartbroken would be an understatement. I joined the company with the plan to build something and stay for a very long time.
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Naya Rivera saved her son. Her last act. May her memory be a blessing, so he grows up knowing she loved him so much and wanted him to live. What sorrow for him to confront, it's unfathomable.
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Somebody pinch me. My first NYTimes byline will be on the front page of tomorrow’s historic paper.
(Well, just my name in the bottom right, but still!)
The front page of The New York Times for Nov. 8, 2020.
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Im halfway through the Caroline Calloway essay and it's mesmerizing and insane and so of this era, especially as my first introduction to Caroline Calloway. Underscores how we live in these separate bubbles, with micro celebrities that mean so much to some and nothing to others
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I keep thinking about the Parkland kids and Newtown parent who killed themselves and how dispiriting it must have been for them to see New Zealand meaningfully ban weapons immediately, when they’ve fought for years for any US politicians to do something only to get silence.
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I didn’t report the guy who, freshman year, raped me in his room. He was an ex and I didn’t know I was allowed to say, “we’d had consensual sex before but this time was different.” It took me years to talk about and process my feelings. Trump’s tweet today is a fresh assault
I have heard from a lot of women, friends & strangers, who say that the Kavanaugh news cycle has devastated them, brought up old stories, in a way that nothing had yet. I've been thinking about this, and the pain of having tried to leave something behind
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(Update to my joke tweet about the royals: I've been moved all day by the responses from people who have left their families or been kicked out or had to find a new family in order to be accepted. You are all incredibly brave and I see you!)
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People in your 20s, be warned: There’s a specific kind of late 30s epiphany/regret that boils down to, “I wish I’d listened to my Mom and worn sunscreen.”
Let me be your internet mom and remind you: you need sunscreen. Everyone. All of you. And don’t forget your hands and chest.
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@EricRSammons
God: "I've designed the mothers to feed the babies"
Mothers trying: nipples bleeding, no milk coming, bacterial infection raging, excruciating pain
Babies: tongue tied, unable to latch, starving, puking up milk their allergic to
God's helper: Maybe we should update the design?
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@grantwaldvogel
it made my day. at first i walked out and was like, should i be offended here? then i looked down at my clothes and saw i was in a canadian tuxedo and he was just making a very reasonable observation!
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Did everyone know this is what happens when an artichoke heart flowers?!
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It's hard for me to express how frustrating it was to watch
@jack
's talk at TED today. I was frustrated, the audience was frustrated, he was frustrated, the people he was talking to were frustrated. It was a whole frustrating thing!
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@EricRSammons
God: "Nah, I gave humans intelligence so they'll figure out a solution to these problems eventually"
~babies starve for eons~
Humans: invent formula
Religious humans who have never given birth to a child: "That's not how God intended you to feed your baby, lazy monster."
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Told my kid that even if we invented a time machine we couldn't go back before the big bang to observe it bc the material the time machine would be made from had to come from the big bang itself, and he looked me dead in the eye and goes, "You think I haven't thought of that?"
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I’m going to be thinking about this thread for a long time.
Does my name belong to me? My face? What about my life? My story? Why does my name refer to events I had no hand in? I return to these questions because others continue to profit off my name, face, & story without my consent. Most recently, the film
#STILLWATER
.
/ a thread
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growing up, i watched cheaters get As, and plagiarize their way into good colleges. i expected one day they'd get their comeuppance, but no. they have good jobs and cultural power. our culture is designed to reward scammers, so long as they come from wealth and never apologize.
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“I decided I really like parties and I really love you and wanted a day to celebrate you so I didn’t give up,” he just said about his decision to reinstate the party.
How am I supposed to work through that.
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Apropos of nothing, one of my Dad's best/most underrated films is Moon Over Parador, about a dictator who dies and his government covers it up and hires a jewish actor from New York to impersonate him and he turns the country socialist and deposits his sexy girlfriend as ruler
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He hung decorations, picked snacks, and put on his party jacket 😭
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Me: Can't chat now my love, I have a meeting.
4yo: OK can I just tell you one quick thing? Does water last forever? And did you know that not all kangaroos carry their babies in their pouches? And what happens to me if you and Daddy die before I'm a grown up?
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I’m going to take a few days to process this. I’ll get to hang out with this little man, who is now nearly 9 months old! But then I will be on the job market, too, like so many in our industry. I'm thinking of you all. You can reach me at emily.dreyfuss
@gmail
.com. <3
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No pants nation
!! Walmart EVP of corporate affairs Dan Bartlett tells
@YahooFinance
that amid
#coronavirus
: “We are seeing increased sales in tops, but not bottoms” because so many people are doing video conferences from home. and all that matters is the above the waist shot. $WMT
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@realDonaldTrump
I was 20 years old and beautiful and happy only to see my youth miraculously disappear as the days went by. Perhaps my 20s will return as my legal proceedings against the continuity of time move forward!
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@mdhardeman
ok i have been wondering about this. so in physics, does "sound" imply that it can be "heard" by receptors?
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I'm rooting for
@Pillowfort_io
. And
@dreamwidth
. I loved learning about these two companies who are so philosophically different from the major social media players
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6 year old, looking up from his legos: Remember when there wasn't Coronavirus?
2 year old: No?
6yo: Of course you don't remember. You were a baby. It was pretty cool.
(As I witnessed this conversation I imagined we were in a bomb shelter after the end of the world)
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also like, i should be clear: lots of people have parents whose work takes them away from home for long periods of time. our situation was notable only bc our dad would be gone working, but still talking to us through the TV lololol
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imagine being like "nah i don't want sick people to afford their medication."
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Hey, 2021 is the new 2020, amirite? So about your last email...
Sorry for the delayed reply, there's sort of a lot of democratic norms falling apart...
Thanks so much for reaching out! I missed this while I was covering the coup.
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Teach this graph in graphic design school. It’s perfect.
Erectile dysfunction is 3x higher in covid positive men according to this study…
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The mom guilt was too strong. I closed my computer and found that he’d already decided the party was back on. He’s been DJing some songs.
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I desperately want to return to a time when I didn’t think about the president of the United States every day
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In case you're wondering how working from home with a four year old who is sick of covid is going.
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His voiceovers were like: "Be great. Don't settle for mediocrity."
And even though they were ad copy taglines trying to convince people to buy Accords, we'd be like, "Thanks for the life advice Dad!"
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Hi, I hope your family member is recovering since last time we spoke. But I wanted to check in about that deadline.
Hi there, wow, it's crazy that we have to keep working through all this right? But alas, how is the report coming?
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I don't normally share kid pics, but...
He did this to his "babies" last night, then freaked out when he saw them in the morning
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@AmExperiencePBS
It’s on Ocean Ave in San Francisco. Great neighborhood hardware store that has everything and the people who run it are always so helpful. Win Long Ocean Hardware. 5 stars!
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A woman with long gray hair watched the kids striking on Market Street today and told me, through tears: “Thank god for them. They’ll save us.”
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My favorite email openers lately are actually like this:
Hi, I feel like it's weird to just start in about work without acknowledging the coup/pandemic/general crisis, but I don't know what to say about that, so, I wanted to see if you're interested in collaborating.
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All I want for mother's day is the school day to line up with the work day so working parents (and mostly mothers, bc, norms) are not constantly put in an impossible situation that our culture treats as normal
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Anyone else just so sick of their home? Lol. I’m working from the back seat of my car right now just for a change of scenery.
Probably I will cry when it’s safe to work inside coffee shops again. Reentry into society is going to be messy af
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Normal conversation with 5yo:
"Mom, is it my imagination, or do you think I came out of your tummy?"
"You did."
"Actually, not. I was born on the planet Neptune. My real Mom is made of sand. She's dead. She died getting hit by the moon. But she left me a spaceship as a gift."
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Help, my baby just fell asleep and I have no record player in the house
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I am beyond proud of the team we built and the work we’ve done in our 8 weeks of publishing. Just last week, I was honored to edit
@issielapowsky
’s scoop about turmoil at EPIC, which today led to the organization’s president stepping down.
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@SopanDeb
*whispers* Also, how does a photographic memory help you remember something you heard?
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Choosing to not bring charges when clear crimes have been outlined would be a transparent strategy to keep power at the expense of defending American democracy.
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Hey, I've been thinking about you during this difficult time, and wanted to check in and see if you need anything? I am here for you. Also, if you get a chance, could you give me an update on that project from last year? Hate to bother you but we do need to finish it!
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[Automated away message] Hi, thanks for your email. Given the state of the world right now, I will be slow to respond to email. If you need something urgently, please contact someone else.
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Be nice to flight attendants. Just took a 5 hour flight and when I said, “I’m OK, I’m easy,” to a flight attendant offering drinks, she got extremely serious and teary eyed and said, “Thank you. This job used to be fun, it was great. Now it’s a fight every day.”
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This aside about Betsy DeVos is just scathingly perfect.
“Just a couple weeks after Mr. Trump pardoned four security contractors convicted of war crimes in Iraq committed while working for her brother, Erik Prince."
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Email sign-offs of 2021:
Yours, in quarantine,
Wishing you health,
In solidarity,
Yours, virtually,
Trying my best,
[sent from bed]
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Offered my two year old some pie and he said, “No! I’m scared of pie rats!”
Pirates. He thoughts pirates were rats made of pie.
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This is depraved. I can’t summon enough words for how inhuman this is. Those poor babies. Those poor mothers. This is a human rights abuse of the highest order.
We took breastfeeding moms away from their infants. — the inspector general found
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Hey, so the world is really going crazy, huh? Just wanted to let you know you don't need to worry about turning that thing in this week. Let's call this week a wash. Next week is sure to be less insane, right?
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This is perfect
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The way our society monetizes and values labor makes no sense at all. It’s so shameful. Financial analysts writing in-house memos for elite stock brokers make millions while investigative journalists exposing corporate fraud and corruption get laid off/can barely make ends meet
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Me on my deathbed: “There’s so much I must tell you, and I will when I’m less busy next week”
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Two killings this week allegedly tied to QAnon, one in Mexico and one in the UK.
If you didn’t believe that misinformation at scale and the vast acceleration of conspiracies online have life or death consequences, I hope you understand now.
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symptoms of screensickness include: whining, inability to hear spoken words, inability to eat or urinate, belief that false worlds are more real than real worlds, lack of awareness of time of day, deep emotional frustration and weariness
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Hi, so sorry for the delay -- I meant to send this last week but got sidetracked by the coup
Hey, just saw this email from the 6th (sort of a busy day!)
Hi, I heard you're out of the ICU -- yay! Let me know when you want to resume the meetings.
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in 2018 i pitched a feature about how silicon valley had finally reached adulthood, bc zuck was a dad and the ceos of the major and minor tech companies were elder millennials like me, paying mortgages and figuring writing their first wills...
We are watching Silicon Valley have a massive collective midlife crisis and it is very sad and very funny
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Also loving the random doomsday closing statements to otherwise normal emails:
Hi,
Is today still a good time to talk?
Cheers, and hope you're healthy and safe under lockdown!
Emily
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Friends, we made you something. It’s called The Media Manipulation Casebook.
The Casebook is a database to make sense of the chaos of this era, to help you understand how to detect, document, and debunk media manipulation.
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Interrupting a father talking about the military valor of his dead son who everyone in the nation saw him mourn was a questionable debate tactic
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Doubled? Wow it’s almost like you didn’t need to lay off half your newsroom a month after you launched last year huh? Oops!
Protocol is growing in a big, big way. We've already doubled the size of our newsroom this year, and now we're growing again. Jobs thread 👇
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the rising cost of groceries in this country is so alarming. most articles i read talk about inflation as this macro abstract thing. politicians talk about it in the abstract, warning of recession etc. my normal grocery list for a for a household of 5 added up to over $400 today.
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This is the first good pun
Man who jumped out of restaurant freezer and threatened employees with a knife before dying of cardiac arrest was a suspected cold-case killer, authorities say.
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Just a few telepresence robots hobnobbing at
#TED2019
, one of whom is physicist
@DavidDeutschOxf
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~Some personal news~
After 5 years, I’ve left WIRED. I loved every second working with such smart, wonderful people and I wish them all the best. My next thing is very exciting, and I can’t wait to tell you all about it...as soon as I can...which isn’t yet. So stay tuned!
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Can I just say, the teens are all right. I've spent most of today talking to teenagers and I am filled with a kind of hope I haven't felt in a while.
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@kstraith
My guess is her babysitter is actually a live-in nanny, which makes sense if her parents are constantly both away for work.
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Man at the coffee shop just ordered a bagel, coffee, and a beer, then sat down, chugged both drinks and started highlighting a stack of documents.
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These men love men and hate women. What other takeaway is there? It’s crushing, but obvious.
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Turned on the radio right as NPR was reporting the mass shooting in Arkansas.
3yo: Wait, did they say children?
7yo: That's my question exactly. Mom, did it say CHILDREN were shot?
Me: Oh god, yes I think so.
7yo to 3yo: Don't worry. That's NOT EVER going to happen to us.
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Hi team, I know everyone is feeling a lot of emotions right now, and our CEO wants to remind everyone that the most important thing is the work must go on.
Hi there, haven't heard back from you and got a little worried -- are you ok?
Hey, sorry to hear you got laid off, but...
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