Elizabeth Teets
@ElizabethTeets
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Comedian, Jumpsuit Queen. Isn't She Great @HollywoodTheatr Writer @nytimes @latimes @reductress https://t.co/fBPsAIRcpx
Hollywood, Los Angeles
Joined May 2011
i love art history! there’s no other reason i’m posting this image of judith slaying holofernes painted by artemisia gentileschi
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Imagine revealing yourself as a Trump and Russell Brand supporter in one go. Anyways, I would like to congratulate Audra on her 100th Tony early.
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H - nothing wrong with me O - nothing wrong with me T - nothing wrong with me T - NOTHING WRONG WITH ME O - something's got to give G - something's got to give O - SOMETHING'S GOT TO GIVE NOWWWWWW
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Thrilled to make my debut in @mcsweeneys by speaking out on an important issue that impacts us all
"If it wasn't for lesbians, we wouldn't even have the concept of forcing all of your friends and family to meet the new love of your life, only to break up with her a few days later." https://t.co/By5U8EDyD7
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Johnny Depp to receive the Lifetime Achievement award at the Rome Film Festival.
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I have nothing to add on the Olivia Nuzzi scandal except to say that Lily Rabe and Dennis Quaid are going to absolutely kill it in the limited series Ryan Murphy is probably cooking up as we speak
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Time to stop for a little iced coffee
BREAKING: Harvey Weinstein rushed to hospital for emergency heart surgery - ABC
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Me and @gregmania
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it’s time.
goodbye forever brat summer.
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Why is it always “u up?“ and never “come jump in bimbo friend, let us do it again: hit the town, fool around, let’s go party!”
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I would like to amend my previous statement about which Gallagher brother is correct in all matters
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The new Sabrina Carpenter album shouldn’t be this good. I won’t explain further.
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I am a special type of white trash…she died when I was 30
Did y'all ever get to meet y'all Great Grandma? Seriously tho....I wanna know
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this having more likes than my tweet really confirms for me that the are large swarms of extremely simple people that need to be spoonfed everything
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