David Spade
@DavidSpade
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This is the real, official David Spade. Any other accounts are fake.
Joined March 2009
THE WRONG MISSY. I love this movie and its finally coming out. Its a big comedy with a lot of my buddies. Check it out May 13th on @Netflix and find out why I don’t shave and die my hair brown. 🦈🦈 #thewrongmissy @NetflixIsAJoke @LaurenLapkus @RobScneider @NickSwardson
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Because comedians don’t have a medical chart for everyone in the audience.
@DavidSpade Why would you phrase this as “a GI Jane joke?” instead of “a joke about a woman with alopecia”? 🤔
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Richie Bitchie is a huge influence.
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Hey @elonmusk. Are u paying the whole 44 billion up front or do u have payments. Because thats where they get ya.
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We are ath-a-letes.
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Im warning you this look is tough to maintain.
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Hey @Uber , not to sound mean but you should add an option when you order a car that says you want driver to talk or just want it quiet. Some people just want to chill. And some clients want to chat. But it should be a choice. I think ppl would like that.
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Universal amphitheater backstage. @chrisrock show. Farley was talking to the camera and Adam said it’s a picture not a video and we laughed.
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Katy at my book signing. I love this pic of her. So pretty. I dont think everyone knew how fucking funny she was. Its a rough world out there people. Try to hang on
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Golf lesson with this guy today. And you know what? He’s not bad… He picks things up very quickly. Good listener
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Everyone’s running out for Black Friday sales. 70% off. Basically exactly what everything was last year this time before inflation.
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Hilarious. underseen Farley gem.
25 Years Ago Today: A Nancy Kerrigan hosted “Saturday Night Live,” with Aretha Franklin as the musical guest, generates ratings that won’t be topped for 14 years. The highlight? Chris Farley’s performance & @DavidSpade’s commentary of Olympic ice skating
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21 years ago one of the greats died Chris Farley. Here’s some gag reel stuff of him from Tommyboy
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.@AdamSandler ‘s Farley song on @nbcsnl the other night is a killer. Check it out if u get a chance. Warning. Its a tearjerker.
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Why do I feel like all of America wants Jake Paul to get knocked out.
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Worth it even for a few mins.
What happens at a meeting of the minds behind some of @nbcsnl's funniest sketches? Back in 1994, @CindyCrawford went to dinner with #SNL greats @AdamSandler, @DavidSpade, Chris Farley, and @MrTimHerlihy, and learned they have just as much fun after the cameras stop rolling 😂❤️
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I was in Kentucky and had to find a #fireworks stand #joedirt #snakesandspaklers #theconsumer #july4th
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Is it true that Jake Paul is going to fight the leader of the Taliban at the MGM Grand in two weeks?.
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Just finished day one. Happy to finally be doing this thing.
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My iphone just told me my screen time last week was 9 days. Is that even possible isnt a week still 7?? I have no idea.
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Heard its his birthday today. I realize that there's some young people don't know him. Please look him up.
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I stole this off the Internet. It made me laugh. 2nd meow is the best.
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All kidding aside. Rules for earthquakes. Stop. drop. then instagram yourself and be super dramatic. Sit back and count likes. #EarthquakeLA.
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Happy birthday to one of the greats. @danacarvey. If u dont remember he was the better version of me on #snl. Thanks @kevinnealon for finding this pic
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Me hogging camera with will ferrell and dana. Will podcast is up now. The dude does not disappoint. Always good.
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Uber is soon going to be testing the driverless car. Lets first test the talkless driver and see how that goes.
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Hey @elonmusk , can you pull some guys off of the floating car idea and put them on a corona cure? It’ll probably take them a week tops. And then you can go back to hot air balloon Uber and LA to Paris tunnel. Thank yew ⚡️.
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How does Tony Romo know more now than when he was playing? He went from Jedi to Yoda overnight.
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Hey guys I’m going to do a new nightly show on @ComedyCentral right after the Daily Show. Coming soon. Here’s the official announcement above more deets to come. P.S. Order me a deet salad
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I have to say as an Arizona native that i hope people notice that Kyler Murray is doing such a solid job this season. I know alot of other great players get the chatter but this dude is quietly making great plays and being very interesting to watch. @K1. @AZCardinals.
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These 2 assholes…hey just doing final voice stuff for Hotel Transylvania 3! Invisible man has an invisible girlfriend @chrissyteigen Shes hilarious in it. Opens July 13! 👻👻👻🧛♂️
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Can anyone recite these from memory. I dont think i can. 🇺🇸
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This is great.
My 1 year old’s Halloween Costume because everyone always says he looks like Chris. Holy Schnikes!!! #TommyBoy @DavidSpade @nbcsnl @TheEllenShow
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Be honest… when you posted a picture of you and your mom,Is everyone posting the best picture of themselves or the best picture of their mom. BE HONEST. Ive seen some thoughtless photos!! Its her day!!.
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This came out 20 years ago? Oh boy. Have to say its one of my favorite things I’ve done. Thanks for all the people that watched it over the years the guys at @DisneyAnimation did such a great job
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Old shot of me with the late great Phil Hartman. One of the best ever on #snl he also did the Simpsons the list goes on and on. Always tried to learn from this guy. Ended too soon
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I stop watching any video Instagram or tik tok that says ‘wait for it. ’. Get fucked.
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One of the best dudes in my life gets a huge award tonight. @AdamSandler get the mark twain award. On #cnn. This is from first album he did. @RobSchneider #brooks
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I got this knock off from the Maroon 5 mixed review collection available exclusively at Kohl’s. Ps on @JimmyKimmelLive tonight
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This funny clip has turned into a tearjerker. We went to a Lakers game and Kobe said hello but later on down the stretch he was in the zone. I think the lesson is, when Mamba in the zone, let him do his thing even if your one of the funniest guys in the world @chrisrock
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When i did SNL and played owen wilson w a nose that looked too much like a dick
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Take that Bruce Lee. #BottleCapChallenge. I challenge @chrisrock and @TomBrady #stretchfirst.
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I cut this out of the paper when I was on the same page as two of my favorites. The old San Diego improv was great.
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Dang
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They all look like winners to me.
obsessed with the kids who made the finals of the USA Mullet Championships and their absolutely fucked up names
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What a blast that show was.
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Picture i promised of Farley at @realjonlovitz super bowl party fake eating a cat. The story he told on the podcast this week
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Remember guys your vote doesnt count if u dont post a picture of you with a an ‘I voted’ sticker.
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I cant believe 10 years ago this came out. This & Grown Ups 2 are some of the funnest times I’ve had my whole life. #grownups #grownups2 We miss Cameron, such a great part. @AdamSandler @chrisrock @iamrobschneider @KevinJames @salmahayek @MayaRudolph #mariabello @iamcolinquinn
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Whats up guy? #fatheroftheyear out on @netflix NOW Watch the shit out of it. Then leave it on accidentally and watch it again. Or just walk in kitchen
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One of my proudest writing moments.
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