Mooms - The Integrity & Honesty Liker
@Danny_McMoomins
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Following
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Statuses
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Doctor. A polite and friendly man. Living my best life. Good manners and respectful conversation. No swearing on TL pls. Rated 'Excellent' by Trustpilot.
At The Fezzy
Joined February 2009
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#MetGala
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ariana
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Zendaya
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Lana
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Manchester United
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連休明け
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Macklemore
• 161535 Tweets
Ten Hag
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メットガラ
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Tyla
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GW明け
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Rihanna
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Cardi
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#WWERaw
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Casemiro
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Katy Perry
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Timberwolves
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Kendall
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The Nuggets
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Mona Patel
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Blake Lively
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The Wolves
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休み明け
• 35426 Tweets
Summer Vacation
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Sant Shri Asharamji Ashram
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Spiritual and Mental Growth
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#NuevoGranHermano
• 26535 Tweets
Gobert
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ゴールデンウィーク明け
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Barnsdall
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竹田くん
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Haliburton
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Bartlesville
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満員電車
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Pinned Tweet
Putting the glass plate in the microwave back on the three little triangles and the ring with the little wheels
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God fucking hates that gaff
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Apparently humans worldwide consume 55 million chickens every single day. Answer me this, veggies: do YOU want to live with an extra 20 billion chickens running about the gaff each year?
Thought not. Time to fuck up and join the fight. Then we'll start on the bastard cows.
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Everton
Can eggs be destroyed in a crusher without pushing them down?
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Jesus. Can't have Germany going out in the groups. If the last time that happened was 1938, to say they took it badly is an understatement.
#GERSWE
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The fact that Harry Potter never once magicked himself up some sweet Air Max 110s or a killer six-pack tells you everything you need to know about the bed-wetting little square.
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Tell you what's definitely NOT coming home this summer: Tommy Robinson.
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You to take that fucking PayPal link out of your bio, you begging scruff.
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Vine would still hit a van in here
With 12,500 parking places, the Bicycle parking Stationsplein in Utrecht, The Netherlands, is the world's largest bicycle parking
[📹 De Filmende Fietser]
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Stick a Sky Sports News reporter in the front of this and you've got Deadline Day in Stoke
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The Vardy children unwrapping a load of XL Bullys
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If Caciedo is worth £111m and Rice is worth £105m, then you can only wonder what monetary value could have been placed upon Princess Diana or Captain Tom ❤️🇬🇧
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The most shocking thing about Girona being top of La Liga is that they're definitely an Italian team and I won't be told otherwise.
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Is this bloke the final level Poppy Boss?
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Just witnessed the most pointless power move in the history of The Tescos. Yer arrowed man, old fella, ABANDONS his trolley, walks by everyone, and casually waits at the the bottom for his weetabix etc to be served up by the travelator, saving ZERO seconds. Never seen the like.
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If Brexit really does bring back the 'Good Old Days', the one thing I'm very excited about is seeing dogs stealing strings of sausages from irate butchers.
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Perhaps the Outlook lads who request a Read Receipt can request some mates too while they're at it
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Hope that Range Rover is doing 90
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For anyone asking "When is Straight Pride?", Stoke vs Hull kicks off at 3pm.
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Genuinely one of those people you hear about writing to murderers in prison and getting married to them
I’m not sure anyone actually doubted this, however, I am 💯 behind
@BorisJohnson
the PM who consistently gets all the big decisions right.
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Hope Kompany goes for *the* Player/Manager unveiling
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Sick of this bloody child moaning about the climate. Her parents want investigating.
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Can't believe it 😂😂😂 thought I'd bought some clear cellophane. Turned out to be silver wrapping paper!!! 😂😂😂
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It's almost as if Russell Brand, an intelligent man, knew this day was coming, and got on the conspiracy grift so he could counter it with pish about 'the elites ' coming to silence him.
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"Hello, Eon customer services, how can I help today?"
"Do you know what 'nemesis' means?"
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Today's your day, King. Time to shine.
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Not like him to swerve
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Timeless. And probably RIP.
1 year ago today, a Millwall fan sniffed his way to 200+ bpm at Wembley.
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Who can forget this hilarious line from Despicable Me?
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Heartwarming scenes in the Dyche household as the kids unwrap their Wickes selection boxes.
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You could say it Ain't Patrick's Day!
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I miss these lads. Him, Pickering, Hands on the car and prepare to die guy. We really had it all, didn't we?
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"Eurovision in Liverpool is it? Enormous carbon footprint, you say? Televised worldwide, are we?"
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Great seeing the 'Back to School' signs up in all the shops rn. Drink it in, you little cunts. Fun's over.
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Rangers fans shouldn't be too upset about that result. They've got a royal wedding and baby coming up to get super weird about.
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"I like to see all the English teams do well in Europe".
Michael Jackson's drummer confirms his haunting last words hours before death
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Kid here's got a match ball
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Imagine. You're only 16 years old. A prodigy the likes of which your sport has never seen. You've made it to the final of the World Championships. You walk to the stage & turn to face the crowd who are singing your name. It's a sea of pissed up dickheads mostly dressed as Luigi.
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Snoop Dogg stops smoking pot the day before Everton get a point deduction 🤔
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🎶He is the broadband giver of the IRA🎶
Labour will make broadband fast and free for everybody, in every home, in every corner of our country.
This is real change.
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Nothing but Munich chants from that away end last night. Disgusting.
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Remember - Treat work colleagues who've just been to Glastonbury exactly the same as those who've run a Marathon the prior weekend. Do NOT let on. Don't give them what they want.
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Whatever happened to just sitting down and shutting the fuck up?
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The king of 4am kitchen chat
Trump: All I know about magnets is this, give me a glass of water, let me drop it on the magnets, that’s the end of the magnets
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Supermarkets are extra busy today, so it's never been easier to trip a child up, or shove one into a display. Their word against yours, too.
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Hope it's Can't Pay We'll Take It Away. Big George Windsor ripping 50" UHD tellys off the walls of people who wont pay their Brighthouse tick.
Prince George will appear in a special episode of his favourite TV show 💛
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Interested to see how Manchester United somehow end up harbouring Daniel Abed Khalife this weekend.
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Has anyone considered that maybe Harry Kane has just been sat on his driveway, tangled up in a seatbelt for days?
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Gonna be some craic when the DUP and the Tories fall out over gay rights, abortion, dinosaurs being real, and the earth being round.
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"We like to see all the English teams do well in Europe"
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Do you reckon there's never a single local resident in the background because they've all moved out?
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What Crystal Palace fans think they look like vs how everyone else sees them.
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🏉🏉🏉2019 SIX NATIONS CHECKLIST 🏉🏉🏉
Six Nations time again. And that means your favourite pub will be overrun with *them*. Now, they'll have us believe they're all gentlemen so there's no point trying to fight them. So why not join them? Simply blag it with my handy list.
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Heard that Attenborough has a new show starting on Sunday. Guess what it's about? That's right. Animals. Again. Get a new hobby lad. One trick pony. But then again he'd like that because it's an animal.
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So what if Raheem Sterling has a tattoo of a gun? Wayne Rooney has a Stereophonics tattoo. I know which one I find more offensive.
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Mad how people used to go out and buy a VHS of just goals. Like non-specific team goals.
"What you watching, mate?"
"Goals".
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Yer ma's been compacted 4 times in the back of a bin lorry
A woman has been left seriously injured after she was mistakenly dumped into the back of a bin lorry and compacted four times
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Well, the
#RugbyWorldCup
starts today, and your local pub will be full of obnoxious new patrons whose sole aim is to ruin your day. So if you can't beat 'em, join 'em! Blend in perfectly with my trusted
#checklist
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The 'double shag' at the glass is magnificent
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I see the big, tough, brave men's rugby has had to be cancelled because of *checks notes* a bit of rain.
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"I like to see all the English teams do well in Europe"
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There'll be hundreds of kids out flying around around inner city estates in their aeroplanes this evening, all pretending they're Travis Ludlow.
"I want to show and motivate young people."
Travis Ludlow has just set the world record for the youngest person ever to travel around the world in a plane.
The 18-year-old told
@SkyNewsNiall
what inspired him to soar to new heights ✈️
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In defence of Bully XL owners, I don't think it's realistic that they should be expected to find the time to train their dogs between watching all of their Rise of The Foot Soldier DVDs.
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🏉🏉🏉2018 SIX NATIONS CHECKLIST🏉🏉🏉
The
#SixNations
kicks off again this weekend, with braying dickheads ruining the atmosphere in pubs for refreshment enthusiasts all over the country. Not to worry though, you can blend right in by following my trusted
#SixNationsChecklist
.
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What Peaky Blinders fancy-dress fans think they look like vs what they actually look like
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"Maggie? Can you hear us? Are you there? Tell us what to do."
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Also known as a Sanitary Owl
Bleeding-heart is a species of ground dove with a reddish hue extending down the belly, furthering the illusion of blood having run down the bird's breast
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Next door haven't fucked about
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Definitely trying to wind their own fanbase up with the small boats here
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Hope to god there is at least one Postmaster (incredible job title imo) who was actually on the take and is about to get fully exonerated with pure compo to boot. Win win.
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🏉🏉🏉🏉🏉🏉🏉🏉🏉🏉🏉🏉🏉
Six Nations time again, and that means you're likely to walk in on a different kind of line-out going on in your local pub bogs. You'll need a handy guide to fit in with your new uncomfortably enthusiastic friends, and I've got just the thing.(1/2)
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Sick of International Women's Day disrupting the domestic Women's Day season. Can guarantee our best women come back injured.
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The clocks went back last night. I turned mine back to 1942 (back to when this country last had some balls), and unfortunately it worked. Here I am, tweeting from 1942. I am terribly scared. Death is all around me.
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Monaco's exciting young team getting torn apart by oil money is what football is all about.
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I'd join the police just for that Christmas Day shift. Booting doors in, wreaths flying, steaming in flipping dinner tables over, volleying turkeys out windows, tasering pissed old nans if they look at me funny, baton charging nativity scenes. The most wonderful time of the year.
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I took this photo of the M62 on the drive into work this morning. Can't belive what's happening. Cars being abandoned. Every man for himself. People swearing. The stuff of nightmares
#covid
ー19uk
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Am I the only person who sees Fellaini obstructing Wilshere as he as he carries cans of Strongbow & Special Brew?
http://t.co/7L6dqb2j99
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One singers voice that gives you goosebumps whenever you hear them sing…..
For me? Freddie Mercury every damn time.
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Thomas Tuchel can now take the summer off and concentrate on making his human centipede
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Whatever happened to just standing still and shutting the fuck up?
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Worst superhero ever.
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We may be rivals, but this is class 👏👏👏👏 best of luck for the rest of the season
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Radical Islam
🇦🇫
#Afghanistan
: Footage has emerged showing what appears to be Taliban security forces patrolling the streets of Kabul on rollerblades.
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Been laughing at this for ages now. Like a tropical FUCK OFF ALI.
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Fair play to yer homeless hero fella if he blows that entire £35k on Spice for the lads.
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🏉Merry Eggsmas, Rugger Fans! At least that's what you can say to fit in with GANT-ily clad Bootcut Boys who've set up shop in your local for the
#GuinnessSixNations
. You can refer to my trusted checklist for even more (bonus) pointers! Now let's all do the Haka in a packed pub🏉
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