Whydo we put up with this? https://t.co/f8VMtb4TDb

If Jesus comes back tomorrow, do you really want to be supporting your kids in soccer....on a Saturday....at 7:00 AM? Ask coach @3YearLetterman his opinion. I'm pretty sure it won't involve kicking a non-pigskin ball thing into a stupid net.

So....she met at the door, looking so beautiful, dressed to the nines. The rest is none of your business.

So....I got home at 12:30 this morning after a 16 hour drive from California. Gorgeous Wifey was wondering, if she should doll herself up for my arrival? Now....normally I would say, YES. She's absolutely stunning. But.... look at the time frame. You decide:

2022 is going to be GREAT!!! I'm pretty sure.

Sometimes, you need to have a little stupidity on your birthday. 52 years old, sitting on a saddle, yipping it up at a restaurant full of strangers. Enjoy the moments.

Update: I made it....and it was actually less frustrating than trying to parallel park a semi. Final score: 37 - 27 The opposing team were banking in 3 pointers from beyond NBA territory.....from all angles....over their heads....eyes closed. I really semi-enjoyed it.

It's go time. I'm going to be fake excited. And..... it's a Christian school, so I can't smuggle in a flask of dad juice. This is seriously going to be the longest 2.5 hours of my life. See you all soon.

I need everyone's prayers. I was just informed I WILL BE attending a junior high girl's basketball game tonight. Apparently, I need to support both my nieces, as they pursue a career in amateur sports. I asked Gorgeous Wifey, if we could just send a check? The answer was no

Just a boy and his dog. Seven years and still going strong.

Does this look like a crazy person? Do I need to up my medication, because it's almost like @HollyBriden got hot..... all of a sudden. I'm really confused.

So...... Gorgeous Wifey just gave me permission to tunnel into the back yard and create a secret room. Complete with everthing needed to survive any sort of apocalypse. I'm going BIG, folks.

#NewProfilePic

@DTitland Well, and this

Those who quote tweet are idiots.

Watch and RT this if you haven’t.

Beautiful full moon presented in the finest nature of Detroit. Bah.... come on.

Adventures after a long week.

My name is Rabid Goldfish. I'm God's Right Hand, dishing out justice Old Testament style. Oh....and I make a genuine reuben to die for.