Crywank
@CrywankBand
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Crywank is Jay & Dan & Jules. Tweets from Jay. Unofficial world record holder for most shows in most cities in 24 hours (16 shows). On Tour May/June
Uk
Joined December 2012
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Pinned Tweet
Two tours over may and june
With local news legend, guard petal and sign crushes motorist
Hope you can make one of the shows
Combo of full band and solo shows
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Can’t sleep. Just sat here smoking a cig and thinking about the world.
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Ok I just saw the barbie movie and it’s actually disgusting, the whole movie is all about how women should kill men, how men are weak and don’t deserve rights, and how everybody should be a gay satanist vegan and that straight people and Christians should all be put in prison.
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I can’t believe there is a part of the internet that updates people on my injures lol
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‘Here you go, You do it’ a cover album of other musicians doing Crywank songs will be released January 2022. Featuring covers from COMMUTED, Guardin, Kylie V, Last Whole Earth Catalog, Ellis, Zwidy, Chastity, Dandelion Hands, Hey ILU, Kapil Seshasayee, Lovejoy and more!!
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‘Here you go, you do it: a crywank covers compilation’ is finally on all streaming platforms. Please add the songs to your playlists, check out the album and share them around! Featuring songs from Kylie V, Lovejoy, Guardin, COMMUTED, Ellis, Dandelion Hands, Hey ILY, & more
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The Joe Biden cameo where he comes out in a dress and says “I declare an end to heterosexuality, masculinity and Christianity. I officially step down and barbie is the new president. This is the future I have always wanted” really didn’t sit well with me either.
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This is my guitar, get your struggle right.
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I keep seeing people doing fan art of me but with me wearing glasses and holding a bass guitar, which is nice but I play acoustic guitar and don’t wear glasses! My name is also Jay and not Ash. Loving all the fan art but thought I’d help correct this frequent error I’m seeing 👍
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Look I’m not a fan of Elon Musk at all but it leaves a bad taste in my mouth seeing everyone making fun of his embarrassing humiliating and incredibly violent death. Just because someone died covered in their own shit and piss doesn’t mean we should mock them ok!
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Shout out to the person who said “oh my god they’re covering lovejoy” when I started playing privately owned spiral galaxy.
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Love this. Yellow donut doggo has a new friend.
i'd like to think that they're good friends
[rts are awesome sauce]
#crywank
#wilbursoot
#mammalionsighingreflex
#art
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My setlist for the lovejoy tour:
Privately owned spiral galaxy (25 minute extended screaming version)
Wonderwall (cover)
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Gotta give my credit to
@lovejoy
in my fourteen years of doing music they’re easily one of the hardest working bands I’ve ever come across. Really blessed that they’ve invited me to play with them on this tour.
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Transphobes unwelcome, even if ur nice gf brings you, we hope she leaves you and you update your brain soon👍👍👍
To the guy on front of me at the
@crywank
show tonight who rolled his eyes when Jay pointed out the trans inclusive pride flag on the drum kit....
What band did u think u were seeing dude LOL
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Accidentally told a famous artist that I hated his art and it confused me. I was at a gallery in Vienna and this guy asked me what I thought of the art as I was analysing it for a while, after we had an honest chat about the art piece I discovered he was the artist. Ooops.
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This is gonna sound so ungrateful, but I have hundreds of these bracelets that fans have given me now and it’s getting difficult travelling with them (appearing everywhere, getting tangled, bursting in my bags etc). What do I do with them? Is it ok to give them to other fans?
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Trans awareness week pronoun check
Jay (guitar/vox) - they/them
Dan (drums/vox) - he/him
Jules AKA Guard Petal (bass/vox) - She/They
🥚 🍳 🪺
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So this is happening
Solo tour of the usa
Excited to finally play with lovejoy
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Crywank was actually a mean nickname I was given due to how visibly depressed and antisocial I was at the time. I lived in a party house but didn’t leave my room much so people always said I was Crywanking and started calling me Crywank. Felt natural to use when I made music.
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@neilfaggotperry
Lol I hate explaining jokes but ok, yes it’s a parody of all the right wing commentators who have just spent their day today complaining about Barbie. I haven’t seen the film yet and I’m very excited to. I collect barbie dolls ☺️
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Cool!
Pebble Brain is the second EP from Lovejoy which (barring the disaster of our online distributors) should be available to stream 14th of October 2021!
Follow us to stay updated!
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Due to my general lack of interest in becoming a sculptor I made this instead when I was 23.
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I wish for you what you wish for Palestinians
I wish for you what you wish for trans people
I wish for you what you wish for refugees
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Me and
@Mark_LVJY
are now best friends for life
I haven’t confirmed if mark agrees to this arrangement, but also he has no choice
Thanks for performing with me, deeping out, saving me when I snap strings and literally filming every show I did this tour, you’re a real one!
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I can’t believe in 2023 some people still use ‘autistic’ as an insult and will just imply people’s support means less if they’re autistic.
Some of the people I love the most are autistic. The autistic fans of my band are the some of the sweetest people I’ve ever met.
So ye fuck u
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I remember when a now-cancelled uk musician/producer started talking shit about me on twitter and loads of people I thought where friendly with me in the uk scene liked the tweets.
Anyway I made a list and I am petty and I shit talk all of you if you’re name is ever mentioned 👍
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One of the Smosh guys has a crywank tattoo? And it’s the same tattoo as my Crywank tattoo??
Whoah crywank in Smosh vid??
+cover for reference
Ignore the no context lol
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I bought a 30 year old cassette tape and when I searched it online it had only one result. One college radio play. Anyway after listening to it and looking into it more I think I’ve found the people who made it. One of them lives off grid and seems pretty famous on tiktok.
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Sometimes people can’t tell when I am joking online, so here is the rule, if you agree with it I am not joking and if you disagree then I am obviously joking. I hope this helps.
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I’m gonna eat one
Will Lovejoy’s yoghurts have been appropriately labelled
We don’t want a repeat of last time 💀
@goodkidband
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I remember listening to this really good sad album on YouTube with a yellow dog on the cover that’s biting it’s own tail. Its acoustic and kinda silly but depressing, the singer might be English and it had a really long name. Pls retweet and help me find this lost classic album!
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Oh no a notes app post that I will probably delete very soon
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I rarely played ‘song for a guilty sadist’ on the lovejoy tour as it didn’t always feel appropriate for the crowd. Our Halloween show with lovejoy is 18+ though so I will be singing an extra special X rated version of guilty sadist with nineteen extra verses and an erotic dance.
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Don’t be mad at me if you listened to my music too young. I never expected 12 and 13 year olds to check out Crywank and subsequently melt their brains. Blame the people who made those warrior cat Crywank animations on YouTube. I’m 95% sure it’s their fault not mine 😬👍
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Fun fact: you’re all GROSS. This is from my first Australian tour in 2017 when shampoo exploded in my bag and broke my 3ds. This reference is about how sad I was that I couldn’t play Pokémon anymore 😇
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Feeling very emotional. Writing this album saved my life, and changed my whole world. I’m so grateful for all the support and love it’s received. It was self released, recorded in our front room and I never ever would’ve expected the response it got ten years ago. So grateful ❤️
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Hate that I’m even acknowledging this, but…
Everyone who got into us 2009-2017 is a loser, worst fanbase area ever. 2018-2020 are overprotective and I like that, keep protecting me. I refuse to even acknowledge anyone 2021 or beyond until 2026
No gratitude 👎
Only hierarchy 🙌
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I’m disgusted and appalled that Margot Robbie did not get a nomination for best actress at the academy awards. This is a huge step backwards for women and representation of women in film. One of the other nominees like Lily Gladstone should offer their nomination to Margot Robbie
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Shortly after writing all the Harry Potter books I also wrote all the songs for a band called big thief. Unfortunately other people have been taking credit for my accomplishments. If you enjoy these books or songs, just remember who the real author is, me!
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TLDR
crywank aren’t breaking up
We were just attention seeking
We have a new band member Jules on bass
We will be writing and recording again
Thanks for your support during our ‘era of confusion (2019-2024)’ xoxo
Now would probably be a good time to mention what is kinda obvious. Crywank aren’t breaking up. We needed a break from each other and the pandemic gave us that. That space kinda healed our relationship. We enjoyed doing our ‘final tour’ shows so much we kept booking more…
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Now would probably be a good time to mention what is kinda obvious. Crywank aren’t breaking up. We needed a break from each other and the pandemic gave us that. That space kinda healed our relationship. We enjoyed doing our ‘final tour’ shows so much we kept booking more…
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Forgot to wish this silly dog a happy ninth birthday the other day, ooops.
Happy belated birthday silly dog that represents my most miserable past self
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Happy pride month everyone
This month let’s all remember
TERFS are losers
No pride in police
Most businesses are not allies and are just using rainbow marketing
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@LVJYprojects
@Mark_LVJY
Mark had a wasp on his lips, I was using my mouth to save him from the wasp
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Wow five years since this! Was actually my first introduction to Will and his music. So cool that we’ve literally toured the USA together since then!!
FIVE YEARS AGO (just about)
wilbur uploaded a cover of “I am a Familiar creak in your Floorboards (Crywank Cover)”
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Fun history fact - Crywank invented the term ‘memento mori’ which means “remember you will die” in 2013. It became so popular that many historical researchers changed their historical documents to include the term.
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mammalian sighing reflex day
So proud of will, easily my favourite songwriting from him yet ❤️
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Got offered to open for a newer musician on a big label who has a smaller following than us at smaller venues than we headline. £50 a show was the offer. Was I too harsh?
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Oh no
@elonmusk
you’re my favourite tweeter and I can’t read your amazing tweets. Some total idiot must have hacked the website to make it so twitter is a broken mess that nobody would want to use! Who would sabotage you in such a horrible way good sir!?
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I personally don’t think that Israel committed warcrimes during the Super Bowl in an attempt to cover them up and distract from them. Israel is committing so many war crimes that it’s going to coincide with so many large cultural events in other countries.
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This guitar is called sausage.
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I tend to follow back and support the fans of crywank who make fan art or do fan related projects. If I am following someone who has posted horrible stuff online it’s probably because I endorse them 100%, and not because of what I said in the first sentence. Just clearing that up
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I wrote this album between the ages of 22 and 23 at the height of my depression. It kinda resulted in me very visibly being a ‘sad loser’ on the internet, lol. Anyway as a gesture of hope for anyone who listens and relates, I am currently the happiest I’ve ever been in my life x
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Thanks to will and david for walking me out on stage yesterday and holding my hands. Your support will echo for a lifetime.
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Every crywank album ranked
1. The one with the dog cover I found on YouTube
2. The rest of them
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I am looking at this amazing top right now and waving at you but you haven’t noticed yet
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Damn I bet Taylor swift is really upset to be clashing with crywank tonight. We are definitely gonna split that crowd 50/50 right down the middle. Must suck knowing her crowd would be double the size if I wasn’t performing on the same night.
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we are reuniting with Lovejoy in Brighton for a show at Halloween 🎃 ❤️. You may also be unsurprised to hear that it’s already sold out!
Fortunately we are still have tickets available for our London ten year anniversary show on the 6th Nov where we play dog album in full! X
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lil me. 19 years old.
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In 2013 we self-released this album online. It turns a decade old in a month. In that decade it’s had over 100 million streams.
Never done much press due to being self managed/no publicist, but If you’d like to do an interview about this album pls email crywankband
@gmail
.com
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Artists aren’t your parents, our fans aren’t our children. Of course we have favourites, they’re usually people who are: nice and respectful, don’t feel entitled to our time, engage with what we make in a healthy and not a parasocial way (making fan art, commenting on posts etc)
artists shouldn’t have obvious favourites and they shouldn’t treat them differently in front of other fans. i said what i said.
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Didn’t actually think I’d ever be able to manage it, especially with a job where I am always at bars and clubs. Very proud of myself today 🙂
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Lol yes. We just had to invest all of our savings to get USA visas so we are gonna get our moneys worth before we do. Crywank will be done by August this year. All the shows on this USA/CANADA tour will be our last shows there. If we do any others it’ll be in different cities.
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A band who doesn’t follow crywank messaged asking to open one of our shows on the U.K. tour
The singer described himself as a ‘Scott pilgrim obsessive looking for his own Ramona flowers’, needless to say he can not be trusted in a crywank audience and the message is ignored.
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I’m not waiting for streaming platforms. Here it is! Crywank Covers Compilation featuring a whole bunch of artists covering our songs. Free download! please share, tell yr pals, let’s goooo. Thanks so much to everyone involved ❤️ (the frog is called wayne)
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Crywank was a nickname I was given by an ex-friend due to the amount of time I spent in my room and how visibly depressed I was. When I started making music I just ran with it.
I wanna know!!
How did your band, or you as an artist, pick out your name?
Mine is a
@puptheband
reference to one of my favorite tracks they ever released!
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Would people want a ‘privately owned spiral galaxy’ specific Crywank tshirt
Like one that doesn’t even say Crywank on it, just privately owned spiral galaxy with trippy artwork
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@YourGaynezz
@crywank
If I ever make a transphobe uncomfortable at our shows I’m happy ^_^
They aren’t welcome, we done want their ticket money
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Just to confirm despite what was previously announced scruffpuppie will not be on this cover album
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To be fair I do now rip off Wilbur when I sing ‘awake’ when I play it live so maybe you could call it a cover of a cover now 🤔
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Shout out to the 100+ people listening to crywank on Christmas Day
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Ive enjoyed opening for a band on tour. In nearly fourteen years I’ve never done it before but lovejoy where all sweeties and took great care of me.
Who would you like to see me open for?
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How is barbie rated PG-13 when there is a 14 min long scene of Barbie pegging Ken. A subtle joke is still too risqué, but this is full frontal, overt and the words barbie writes on Ken’s body during I can’t even repeat. The fact that Obama had a cameo in this scene bewilders me.
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So did Crywank actually break up or not? They released a break up album, followed by another album the following year. And now they’ve just been touring for two years. Really annoying and confusing. Fuck you Crywank!
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I am wearing a waluigi hat. Some guy at the supermarket who queued behind me asked ‘who the fuck are you supposed to be, Mario?”. So I said “it’s a waluigi hat”, he said “gay” and then joined a different queue.
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Received some messages from people saying my sobriety has inspired them which have made me feel bad, so just sharing that I’ve fallen off the wagon. I’ll try again soon.
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Only listened once so can’t give really detailed opinion but really enjoyed it, thought it was better than ‘Are You Alright’ already, which I also enjoyed. My favourite song from the first listen was the sixth track.
I wanna know what
@CrywankBand
thought of the new
@LVJYonline
ep. Whats yalls favourite song??
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