I've got no friends, I'm unlikeable, I'm horrible.. Kill me

No one cares

Friend missed the train. So more beer time.

Strong hair game today.

Locked account because I'm going out and binge drinking. 🍻

Bet they paint roundabouts and put up union flags inbetween noncing children.

Late stage capitalism is so good people have to line up for bread in 2025.

🤣🤣🤣 Woke is back baby.

Grok being a nonce is the least surprising thing ever.

Does anyone else remember the days on twitter when a troll would roast you, but you couldn't help but laugh because they were genuinely creative and witty? Now it's just slurs, death threats and swastikas. Even trolls have become Temu versions of themselves under X.

A woman is someone who covers their drink when you enter the room. A man is someone you'll never be.

Yes, why are they?

https://t.co/OthurkDQB1

So liberating Europe from the Nazis, liberating the death camps, and holding the worst mass murderers to account "wasn't worth it" because..... Apparently we "don't have freedoms", says 100 year old man freely speaking his mind on TV. He's gutted he didn't get an iron cross

I think the argument of "it's not the dog it's the owners" argument is dead now. How many more people have to die because of freak fashion dog breeds?

Well, you heard it here first folks.

🤣🎯

Last night was like living in a weird, dark alternate Jeremy Kyle show episode. One neighbour was arrested, and another destroyed all their furniture and threw it out the window at like 2am. Grim times.

He might find the fella of his dreams in jail and settle down.

My phone is trolling me 🤣. "check here for the best new plus size dresses". Cheeky, I've lost 7kg since may!!