Bob From Accounts 🚲
@BobFromAccounts
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If loving bollards is wrong I don't want to be right
Hackney
Joined February 2011
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The kindness of strangers
Love the NHS.
Love London.
Love Londoners
A thread :
I've been cycling daily in London for over 25 years. A couple of weeks back, shit happened. No idea how or why, in a split second, over the handlebars, I face-planted at speed into Shoreditch High St
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A quick game of Spot the Difference between our PM and the Dutch PM to while away the afternoon.
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Drivers de-icing and warming up their cars for 20 minutes before driving their kids to school 10 minutes away. There's a word for this
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Drivers take note, this is why cyclists ride in the middle of the lane. You’re welcome
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Love you London
Love you NHS
Love you Londoners
please donate
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the Elephant Man's bones. FUCKING LOVE LONDON. So proud about how culturally diverse all the staff are. From doctors, nurses, porters to cleaners. The NHS is built on immigration. Fuck you if you voted for Brexit. Plus a giant FUCK YOU to the Tories for not paying NHS workers a
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a brief summary of the evolution of shopping trolleys over the years
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How am I supposed to do the school run with 4 kids without an SUV ?
Tell me they're not having fun
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Waiting for that tipping point when most sensible people realise that transporting a single 80kg person in 2.5 tonnes of SUV was not the height of technical advancement but peak stupidity for the human race
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He sits with me for 30 mins. He's not paid to do that, he's just human.
An old Bengali man with dementia next to me had a fall. 2 nurses would sing to him at night when changing him, he would light up. Beyond the call of duty.
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Fat shaming is never acceptable unless it's for SUVs that don't fit into a normal parking space.
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The 'London is a shithole, London has fallen' crowd are all people who don't live anywhere near London, never experience London day to day, and have no stake in this amazing, multicultural, beautiful city. Funny that
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few per cent more for their heroically long shifts, dedication & passion. HAVING A PASSION FOR WHAT YOU DO IS NO EXCUSE FOR THE GOVERNMENT TO TAKE ADVANTAGE. Ross, my first responder, also works on the Air Ambulance at The Royal London. He comes to visit 3 days after my incident
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The average speed of a vehicle in London 8.7 mph to 7.1 mph
The average speed of a bicycle in London is 14mph
Remind me who's holding who up?
Maybe move to the side and let cycles pass pls
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The joys of cycling past a long queue of stationary traffic can never be underestimated. Inject it into my veins
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To the person who went to all the trouble to put carpet grippers between the bollards on Goldsmith Row Hackney go f*ck yourself. Removed, despatched
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Roads are quiet this morning?
•That's because it’s the school holidays and an average of 30% of morning traffic in London is school-run traffic
•43% in Tower Hamlets, absolutely shocking
•The average catchment area in London is 1 to 2km, when did parents become so soft?
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A handy guide to avoiding the evil
#ULEZ
and saving yourself £12.50 a day if you're making single occupancy short journeys under 5km in London.
Get one of these 👇
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Partly built from stainless steel now.A long road to recovery. When I am good and ready I intend to keep cycling across this amazing city. It's the future, the past and the most efficient way to traverse a big city.
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Tomorrow Soho goes from a thriving, people-friendly Al Fresco destination and returns to car parking and rat-running for a privileged minority of people who own cars. How's that good for business? A retrograde, out of touch,1950's vision from
@CityWestminster
#Soho
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Why are drivers so annoyed at being slowed down by bikes but are more than happy to be slowed down by other cars?
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The empty, abandoned cycle lanes of London. Tragic
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Trigger Warning. More views from the frontline dystopian hellscape of the
#15minutecity
as I endure this segregated bi-directional cycle lane when I could choose to cycle amongst 4 lanes of traffic. Suffering some incredible views in the best city in the world. Send Help.❤️London
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Singlehandedly refuting the myth with one pic that no one cycles in London on a bitter January morning, that is just men in Lycra, and that cyclists don't stop at red lights. You’re welcome.
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Peak overkill. Nine police officers stopping cyclists at the usual junction of Shoreditch High St and Hackney Road today. I wish the same proactive energy would go into phone drivers
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Revealed: The London drivers who are funding council coffers by thinking laws don’t apply to them
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Ross only has morphine, he's now adamant it won't cut it to move me, So am I. I am in agony. Pass out. Calls in the K-Ambulance, yeah the fucking Ketamine Crew, LONDON WE HAVE A KET CREW AMBULANCE. This Trauma unit arrives asap. BOOM. Don't remember much, I thought I was dead
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Within seconds 4 people came to my aid, FUCKING LOVE LONDONERS.
A restaurant manager, a Big Issue seller, a random man about town, some bloke in a football kit.
Random man about town called the ambulance. Somehow, with these four strangers help, I was moved off the busy High St
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Ideally, Tower Bridge, due to its iconic worldwide status and hoards of tourists, would benefit from being like Hammersmith bridge and just open to pedestrians and cyclists
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Can confirm that the 'going towards the light' is a thing. Not exactly a James Turrell installation, more your own life as the whole of the Netflix back catalogue being replayed at a million miles an hour, with a giant burst of light at the end.
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Before people had the audacity to take up valuable road space from cars by riding cargo bikes, there were these, er, cargo bikes
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🧵 A lot of love for these sturdy soldiers, protecting the frontline of driver entitlement included at the new pedestrianisation of
#StrandAldwych
. Remove cars, restore life. Now do Soho
@CityWestminster
@WorldBollard
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It's that time of the year where some parents idle their car for 20 minutes to warm it up before driving a mile to school.
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Seven Dials made infinitely more pleasant for pedestrians and cyclists by
@CamdenCouncil
not allowing through access to vehicles. Why did we let cars dominate every aspect of our city? Those days are numbered
#LTN
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'dedicated an entire day to finding a new quote but the best she found was around £11,000 a year'
Tiny violins all around
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This is your regular reminder that 58% of households in this area of London don't have a car, yet so much space is pandered to and dominated by cars.
Not everyone can or wants to drive.
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Wake in Royal London Trauma Unit, pain freeish and off my tits. Ross still by my side 4 hours later. He's found my phone to text and call my wife. Wrist crushed many places. Scapula, clavicle and the top of my humerus resembling a bag of Doritos that had been sat on.
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9 hours of reconstructive surgery on Monday.
A week in hospital. According to medical family in other parts of the world, RL leads the way in orthopaedic surgery. Who knew? Spectacular view, down below is the church that houses
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A week until ULEZ.
Bracing myself for no deliveries, no tradesman visiting, never seeing relatives from Kent (the only positive), being a prisoner in my own home, business closing overnight, foraging for food with the foxes, and general armageddon in London.
We are doomed
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Christmas Day, London, The Mall. Remove cars, restore life.
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Restaurant woman brings me water first, then a straw, realising I can't hold the cup. She offers to store my bike in the restaurant she works in. Scottish ambulance man Ross arrives in 10 minutes. I'm doing my best not to pass out after looking at my left wrist and right shoulder
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Remember when removing the four-lane road on the northern side of Trafalgar Square drivers lost their minds. Now no one bats an eyelid. Stupid idea to let traffic there in the first place. Change is possible ❤️
#london
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Drivers
Congestion or pollution is not a symptom of cycle lanes or an
#LTN
Here are nine drivers in single-occupancy private vehicles thinking it's an efficient and sensible choice for transporting a single human across a city.
That's your problem, too many vehicles.
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Suggesting Soho would be soulless, sterile and boring without cars implies that cars add ambience. Cars add nothing, apart from pollution and danger
@CityWestminster
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What was once just another road in central London is now the most MAGNIFICENT, calm place to sit, to walk and marvel at how cities could be. Alfred Place. Well done
@CamdenCouncil
@AdamDKHarrison
#Alfredplace
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dangling like baubles. Ross cuts off my backpack, together with all my clothes. Restaurant woman holds my hand, puts her card in my pocket, gathers smashed belongings. First time lying in Shoreditch High Street naked all but underwear and a blanket.
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Don’t ever let anyone tell you that the removal of 1.5 parking spaces and the addition of a parklet is bad for business. Wilton Way 8pm
#hackney
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Cargo bike ceramics shop. London Fields. Have shop, will travel.
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A handy guide for purchasing cars for cities
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‘I could not possibly do the weekly shop without relying on one of these'
1970 vs 2024
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What felt like 15 minutes laying on the pavement apparently turns out to be 90 mins being worked on.
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Never underestimate the added value of removing just 1.5 car parking spaces to add one parklet. Great for business, great for the community, great for aesthetics, great for conversation. We need more
@hackneycouncil
#wiltonway
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Whilst you are here please spread the word and support the
@thercn
campaign about why a fair pay increase for nurses and all NHS staff
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Normal London parking space . Abnormal modern car
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'headphones are a distraction from your surroundings whilst cycling'
Drivers:
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Drivers inconvenienced by other cars, tractors, horses, vans, buses = totally cool
Drivers slightly inconvenienced by cyclists= furious threat to my entitlement
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Drivers: we hate congestion
How about some schemes like pay per mile to make drivers think twice about their choices, discourage drivers from driving short distances, and de-incentivise the convenience, take the pressure off the roads?
Drivers: War on Motorists
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School Run time again
Average school catchment area in London is 1 to 2 miles.
Why do parents still think it’s ok to drive their children to school in 2023?
( please don’t tell me it saves time )
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Try this one simple hack in London to avoid
#ULEZ
charges, congestion charges, parking charges, speed cameras and fines 👇
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Oh another one
The moral of the story is not to buy Landrovers
The 'destroying lives' is quite the take when it's a personal choice to purchase a vehicle and you happen to live in London.
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Incredible that you can pass your driver's licence at 17 years old and drive for at least another 50 years without any re-test or checks whilst simultaneously developing so many bad driving habits that would have prevented you from getting your licence in the first place
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Those ridiculous empty cycle lanes are at it again. Only 100000 journeys since the beginning of the year in mid-winter. Embarrassing. Embankment
#CS3
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Forced to travel in line of traffic at 8mph due to obstruction caused by drivers ahead in cars with seating 2 abreast.
The law should be changed to force drivers to move to the left when cyclists are behind 😁
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Take note councils, this is how you do it. Just remove some parking spaces. It's not that difficult
#Hackney
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The ‘barely used and empty’ cycle lanes of London clocking up an impressive nearly 25000 journeys in under 7 cold, wet, January days. 9 am today. To clarify,
@carlafrancome
and I are responsible for 22000 of these journeys, exhausting but someone needs to do it. You're welcome
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20mph zone. Rosebery Avenue. London. Speed limiters on all new cars might be a nice idea.
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Trigger warning. A grim glimpse of our dystopian future as I cycle through De Beauvoir in search of oat milk as I don't do beef milk
#15minutecity
#LTN
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Warning : fragile men triggered by bikes have entered the thread
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Hackney, Dalston Lane. 20mph Zone. Driver takes out two sets of traffic lights, iron railings and the front wall of this house. Now tell me why we don’t need mandatory speed limiters on cars ? Second incident in a week
@carowoodley
@metecoban92
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People complaining about
#ULEZ
being a 'money-making scam'. Wait until you hear how much a lifetime of car dependency costs you. The UK average is £437625. Now that's a proper scam
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It's not like cargo bikes are a new thing. Always a sensible and highly efficient choice to move goods around a city. We're going full circle
@pedalmeapp
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Monmouth Street is painstakingly being repaired. Any utility companies that come around here and do their patchwork rubbish again, there’s going to be trouble
@CamdenCouncil
#sevendials
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Another day, another cursed business, struggling inside a
#LTN
solely because drivers can't reach it.
#PeopleFriendlyStreets
#StPeters
@IslingtonBC
😁
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Trigger warning, part 2. A grim glimpse of our dystopian
#15minutecity
future as I cycle through the hellscape of Arnold Circus relinquishing my freedom to pick up a dozen plain beigels, reminiscing about the days you could buy 1 odd shoe on Brick Lane . Stay frosty comrades
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When the bike box is getting crowded it's probably time for some segregated cycle lanes up and down the A10
@hackneycouncil
@TfL
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A classic example of a ‘hair-brained’ scheme, established in 1974 to prevent children being killed
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Big up to the utility companies of London with their dedication to creating shit patchwork quilts of London's beautiful streets, and a shout out to the councils who let them get away with this rubbish
@CamdenCouncil
#sevendials
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The ‘it’s not that complicated’ response to dockless bike hire schemes. Just remove some parking spaces. Cool
@hackneycouncil
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Many would like you to believe that
#LTNs
are a new invention. De Beauvoir LTN in Hackney is 49 years old today. On April the 8th 1974, the first bollards went in to protect local children from drivers and make it safer for everyone. More of this everywhere pls
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Wait until you hear that a mile of motorway costs more than 30 million pounds. I don’t own a car, I still pay for these. That’s how it works, unless you’d like to give me a refund ?
Vast amounts of money have been wasted installing often barely-used cycling infrastructure - which also imposes major costs on motorists, businesses and residents. It was always a fad; cycling just isn't practical for more than a small share of travel.
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Your convenience trumps my safety. I challenged this repeat offender who regularly parks in the cycle lane only to be told angrily, 'where would you like me to park? '. Somewhere legal would be a good start
@FORS_online
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You may be wondering why your bus is delayed, why bus journeys take longer, or what causes congestion.
The number one cause is selfish, entitled drivers like these,
nothing to do with cycle lanes or
#LTNs
You're welcome
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try this one simple hack to avoid expensive gym memberships and have a 41% lower risk of dying from all causes 👇
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the ambience and vibrance of Soho, particularly Berwick St Market, is greatly improved on a Sunday by
@CityWestminster
concession to allow a few dozen people from the suburbs to dump their private property in public spaces for free
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Finally the new cycle lanes on Gower Street are open for business. Breeze past those vehicles. Thanks
@CamdenCouncil
@W_Bradley
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turns out people and communities really really like this sort of stuff ¯\_(ツ)_/¯ No surprises there then.
❤️
#Hackney
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@NewsForAllUK
Exactly the type of anti social behaviour that should be stopped : People who think driving your child to school in and oversized SUV to school is a sensible choice. Poor kid
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Drivers, if you’re frustrated with me cycling in the 'middle of the road' or the middle of the lane as I call it, please vent your frustration with councils for not providing cycle infra, not me. If you think I'll happily cycle in the door zone for your convenience, think again.
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The four stations on Oxford Street London serve an average of 100 million people a year.
Yet the majority of space and priority is given to automobiles.
1950s thinking in a modern international city
@CityWestminster
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Thank God
@CouncillorSuzie
is here to save Londoners from this kind of
dystopian urban hellscape so we can all enjoy the right to live on a polluted, traffic-filled street with the ability to drive 5 minutes to the shop. No Londoner should have access to nice things
#LTN
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Roads feeling a little less congested this morning?
That's because it's half term
Nearly 30% of weekday morning traffic in London is school-run traffic,
Tower Hamlets has the highest in London at a staggering 43 per cent. This is a bad thing
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The choice for inadequate builders who think this is a sensible solution for driving around central London whilst carrying nothing more than one human and a sandwich. Note the width of the parking space
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Normal people: 'This is nice. Liveable, walkable, accessible, quiet and safe.
Conservatives. 'KILL IT WITH FIRE!'
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on the right is a picture of efficiency.
the rest is a picture of how much space is sacrificed for cars
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If you were offered cheaper car insurance on the condition that you had a speed limiter installed that automatically prevents you from going any faster in a specific speed-limited zone, would drivers take it? Probably not.
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