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@WillSasso
Followers
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Following
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Joined May 2008
Today marks the return of the world’s greatest sketch troupe and my favourite (spelled with a “u” out of love and respect for my home and native land) show to our televisions. Long live The Kids in the Hall! @KITHOnline.
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He was more than a brilliant artist. With every performance, he let us into his heart - it was real. Anyone touched by his work saw him as a friend and loved him like family. 25 years passing has done nothing to fade the gift that John Candy gave us.
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Fucking birds singing and chirping like they own the fucking place now, huh?.
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Congratulations to my sister @AlexBorstein on her Emmy win(s). Never not the baddest of bad motherfuckers. ❤️
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“Babe, don’t eat an entire chicken,” my girlfriend said as I ate an entire chicken.
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Chris Farley passed away 20 years ago today. He was as brilliant as he was kind.
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Grateful that I got to spend so much time with my parents over the holidays. I love them both very much. Equally.
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The Merge is finally here! Hurry up and take part in the giveaway of 50 000 ETH!. More Info: #Ethereum #ETH #EthereumMerge
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Check out @RoosterTeeth's 24hr stream to benefit Children's Miracle Network Hospitals cause you're nice. #RTExtraLife
http://t.co/JFR3KXcQ2U.
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A gentle soul left today. Nothing but tragic. My heart goes out to the many who love him. Fuck the stigma - if you’re hurting, please talk. RIP Brody Stevens.
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A Guy with Advanced Gonorrhea Who Can't Tell His Urine is Mostly Blood Because He's Colorblind
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Made a tasty split pea soup in the slow cooker tonight. Threw some smoked pork shank in there too. Haven’t tweeted all that much lately. A little chili flake really unlocks the flavor of peas btw.
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The Merge is finally here! Hurry up and take part in the giveaway of 50 000 ETH!. More Info: Note, You can participate only once. #bitcoin #crypto #Ethereum #ETH #EthereumMerge
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The Merge is finally here! To celebrate, Ethereum Foundation is giving away 50,000 ETH!. More Info: Note, You can participate only once. #Ethereum #ETH #EthereumMerge
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The last 6 hours of anything lasting 24 hours are the best hours of that thing. #RTSalute @RoosterTeeth @OpSupplyDrop
http://t.co/qronB7d7bt.
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Yes, Will Sasso was SUPPOSED to be a humor account - the AI has seemingly gone rogue, resulting in the account becoming an actual person. Your complaint has been registered, thank you.
@WillSasso Wasn't Will Sasso supposed to be a humor account? Now it just looks like another leftist wasteland. Why is it that so many entertainers fall for leftist ideology?.
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When we get self-driving cars, a fun thing to do would be to put your dog in the driver’s seat because it would make people happy to see our streets and highways filled with cars driven by cute dogs, and that’s something everyone can look forward to nowadays.
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I dunno about you guys, but I’m sure not making a nice chicken soup while listening to podcasts about wrestling.
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Haven’t been on Twitter much. I like looking at photos of fancy cabins on Instagram. Anyway, fuck you. :D.
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I don't like it when people start a Snapchat with "hey Snapchat" or any of the creepy Snapchat filters on Snapchat.
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I’ve loved Kenny Rogers since doing a lip sync to “Islands in the Stream” in the 4th grade. His songs are all beautiful stories. Hey kids, listen to the lyrics of “The Gambler,” it’s timeless advice. Glad to hear he passed peacefully, surrounded by family.
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@chrisdelia @eire2529 Are you into any of the popular chain coffee places? Those are mostly good. Would be cool to grab coffee or take some people from one place and hide them in another place and not let them leave.
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If you can’t be with loved ones today, please don’t give it too much of your energy. At this point, Thanksgiving is truly only about eating a menu-specific dinner with some people. You can have dinner with those you care about another time. Anyway, just thinkin’ ‘boutcha. <3.
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There probably isn't a person on earth who hasn't been touched by his gift. Giant light, giant loss. If you're depressed, please reach out.
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I want to shake Donald Trump's hand so when he yanks hard like he does I can yank back so his face hits my chest and he's all like, "OOMPF!".
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DISCLAIMER: All characters within this post are fictitious. Any similarity to actual persons, including @MoChizzles, is purely coincidental.
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Great news! I’m replacing Chris Hemsworth as Thor! LOLOLMAOMGTFO I’M JUST JOSHIN, YOU STUPID FUCK! You bought it! You were like, “Will’s too fat to play Thor but ok whatever who cares.” Hahaha nah, we’re shooting season 2 of @LoudermilkTV and I’m goofing around with some wigs. :D
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I love visiting New York but I could never live here. because if I ever stepped foot on a fire escape, it would immediately rip away from the building and that's the most embarrassingly fat way to die. :D.
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Not-yet-mandatory-but-strongly-recommended-cautionary-grocery-store-etiquette-a-mania is running wild, brother.
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A surefire way to figure out if someone is a good person or not is to ask them if they’ve been impeached twice as President of the United States.
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Hey @KingJames, can I be on your basketball team next year? I suck at basketball, but it would be cool to win a major sports championship. Anyway, lmk. :D.
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With my beloved MADtv siblings, celebrating the show's 20th anniversary. In another 20 years they'll release DVDs.
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Here's a teaser for Follow Me, @MarshallCook and my short on YouTube, which you could just see in its entirety here:
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I’ve spent around $200 at a beef jerky store in a mountain town over the past couple days. ᕕ( ᐛ )ᕗ.
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He���ll probably rat out his own face mask amirite you guys lol jk you guys lol I’m just joshin sometimes you have to laugh in life lmaomgtfo and don’t forget to smile brb don’t forget to laugh and smile in life brb you guys.
BREAKING: Tekashi 6ix9ine to be Released from Prison Early Due to Coronavirus
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“I’m gonna go get the papers. get the papers.”
Ivanka Trump’s photo with her son has been criticized as "tone deaf" Ivanka Trump’s photo with her son has been criticized as "tone deaf".
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Happy Canada Day and welcome to Los Angeles, LeBron. I don’t feel like tweeting twice today.
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@Reuters The Merge is finally here! Hurry up and take part in the giveaway of 50 000 ETH!. More Info: Note, You can participate only once. #Ethereum #ETH #EthereumMerge.
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@cryptojack The Merge is finally here! Hurry up and take part in the giveaway of 50 000 ETH!. More Info: Note, You can participate only once. #Ethereum #ETH #EthereumMerge
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No plans tonight? Try reaching out to some friends and make plans to hang out or try making some fun last minute plans with some friends. :D.
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Lots of people think I'm from Chicago because I'm fat and I've done sketch comedy, so I feel like I'm a part of this victory. #WorldSeries.
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@chrisdelia @eire2529 Ok well that’s fine. People’s crushes change I guess, so it’s all good I guess.
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@saylor @MicroStrategy The Merge is finally here! Hurry up and take part in the giveaway of 50 000 ETH!. More Info: Note, You can participate only once. #Ethereum #ETH #EthereumMerge
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@chrisdelia @eire2529 Cool beans lol. Could definitely do a chill java sesh soon rotfl. Also, I have access to a pretty big cargo van.
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@chrisdelia Sorry it took me a little while to get back to you. I took some time and realized that you were right about those other people. So just coffee, you and me, not those other people. Trust me, no one will be hearing from them anytime soon. IF YOU KNOW WHAT I MEAN LOFL! ( ͡~ ͜ʖ ͡°).
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Really good stuff, you terrorist bootlickers - now back to certifying the most secure election in American history.
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