scheming to attract a top by loudly claiming to be untoppable

If you leave Twitter you can stay in touch with me by occasionally looking at this shrine I made for my cat who is the greater part of my social media presence anyway:

If you leave Twitter you can stay in touch with me by occasionally looking at this shrine I made for my cat who is the greater part of my social media presence anyway:

lmao

going to bed now DREAM MEETUP FOR ALL BUCKAROOS (remember there is no time in dreams so if you miss tonight you can come another we will always be there). bring food please it is potluck in the graveyard but joyful with skeletons playing xylophone on ribs. we are by the old tree

On Instagram the algorithm has recently started serving me what I can only describe as "tragic widow influencers". Like doing a meme dance while text plays like "When they find out you've got a husband... who was eaten by a shark 4 years ago"

Can't even screenshot them because there are so many, but it's very funny that Jordan Peterson is back and has been tweeting, no exaggeration, every four minutes.

lots of worried buckaroos wondering where they will trot to. i think this is a personal question for everyone, lots of different places to stay or go, but i will say this: where you trot is not quite as important as HOW you trot, and you all trot so beautifully it blows me away

If these will be some of my last tweets I really, earnestly want people to know: anti-abortion activists aren’t just evil, they are fucking losers

I've got my sexiest selfie ready to post in the exact instant twitter melts down

Fish always swimming in the same orientation because they haven't read Ender's Game. (Ep.61)

Twitter will be the first website to leave a ghost, a massive specter entangling the globe, crackling like electric milk at the surface of every screen; but not the last

We should've spent every day acting like Twitter was about to die.

relevant

when Twitter collapses and you need to look for me don't