Voodoo Ranger
@voodooranger
Followers
15,214
Following
87
Media
247
Statuses
7,388
Employed by @newbelgium - for beer gear
Everywhere
Joined October 2016
Don't wanna be here?
Send us removal request.
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IPAs are loaded with hops. Hops are a vegetable. Therefore, IPAs are salad.
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Imagine falling in love with someone just to find out they don’t like IPAs.
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BREAKING NEWS: Experts believe drinking two beers is more effective than just one
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The buzzkills of Whine Country want to stop our IPA Action Park. Help us make it happen. Like and share to save the park.
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When you tell bae you’re thirsty and they send you pics but all you really want is a cold IPA.
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Bad news: we lost an hour of sleep. Good news: we gained an hour of day drinking.
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Normalize having beers for adults at kids’ 1st birthday parties.
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If you ever find yourself taking Twitter too seriously just remember a cartoon beer mascot has a blue checkmark
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Like if you drank a beer today. Comment if you’re drinking a beer right now. Unfollow if you’re drinking hard seltzer.
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Remember when random strangers would throw dirty ping pong balls in your drink? Take me back.
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Congrats on the new release
@outriders
. Fans, comment for a chance to win this can art as a poster. And on a totally unrelated note,
@newbelgium
I’m feeling really sick, gonna sit the week out.
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Job Opening: Looking for someone to hold my beer when I'm about to get Rangerous
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My IPA is lightly sweet at first and then builds in bitterness. Sounds like my last relationship.
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If you can’t handle me at my Voodoo, you don’t deserve me at my Ranger.
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I’m just looking for someone who loves me for my beer.
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Name a more common lie than “We’re just going to have one beer.”
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Today, have an IPA on me. Tell em Voodoo Ranger sent you.
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Since everyone's probably over their 600 read limit by now, no one will see this.
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If a rain dance brings water, will a tap dance bring beer?
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When a 30 pack of 4% no longer appeals to you, you’ve reached Vooberty, my friend.
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What are the odds your local dive bar will still have sticky floors when you go back?
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Hops are vegetables. Which makes IPA a salad. Come at me, dietitians.
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I miss bars so much that I’d take the pint glass with a lipstick stain on it at this point.
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If you ever drank the King’s cup, don’t worry about the vaccine.
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Conjure Rangerousness with the limited edition Vastwood Seer IPA, brewed in partnership with
@wizards_magic
to celebrate 30 years of Magic: The Gathering.
#MTG
#MagicTheGathering
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Now that I’m vaxxed, I can make plans to drink beer somewhere other than my couch, then cancel them to drink beer on my couch.
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With the right attitude, any beer can be a shower beer.
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My vibe is drinking an IPA while skateboarding, listening to The Cranberries.
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Coming soon: Sippetizers. Smaller portion beers to stimulate your desire for my tall boys.
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Tag a friend who owes you a beer and I’ll shame them for you.
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Teach a man to drink IPAs and he’ll fish for a lifetime.
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Me to myself every morning: Are you a beer can or a beer can't?
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IPAs make for a great cure for cottonmouth. Just sayin’.
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Just tweeting to pretend I’m writing down this guy’s idea for a Voodoo Ranger hard seltzer.
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I may be a walking, tweeting skeleton. But you know who the real monsters are? The people selling 4-packs that cost more than sixers.
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Public Service Announcement: If you bring hard seltzers to the party, you don’t touch the IPAs.
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Sure, sex is great but have you ever stomped an empty can into a perfect circle?
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Thoughts and prayers to whoever isn't drinking an IPA rn.
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The first five days after the weekend are the roughest. Who’s with me?
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It’s Friday and my Imperial tallboy is dressed to the 9%.
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Drop your favorite movie below, and we’ll tell you which Ranger to watch it with.
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When it’s Oktoberfest, but you’re alone in your apartment
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Just a friendly reminder to take your vitamins I, P, and A today.
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BREAKING NEWS: It’s a repeat of Rangerousness as Juice Force IPA wins a second straight title. But don’t worry, every Ranger gets a participation trophy. Thanks to everyone for voting this year.
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Going for a beer run still counts as going for a run, right?
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Juice Force & Fruit Force ask you to come play. WWYD?
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Say hello to our new friend 😎
He’s here to drink beer and kick ass, and he’s all out of beer. Hitting shelves now, the newest member of our Voodoo Ranger Rotating IPA Series is exploding with tropical citrus flavors and aromas. He’s locked, stocked, and fully hopped. Find it near you:
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So are you all just going to pretend they don’t exist?
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Level up, the weekend is finally here. Choose your Ranger and then FINISH HIM.
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I used to only drink IPAs. I still do but I used to too.
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I Doo quite well with a Juicy Haze IPA, thanks for asking.
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When the cashier has to type in my birthday at the self-checkout.
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When I wake up to see that Twitter is still working in the morning, and I have to start whipping up some tweets.
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If a beer falls in a forest and no one drinks it, that's really sad.
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