How the fuck is he REAL

https://t.co/FiVhV1NRpx

kiwi fruit is a DELIGHTFUL treat

sorted r/hygiene by controversial

every day i inch closer to the world's least successful GFM to fund a breast reduction

boobs got bigger on the pill and if they dont go back to normal in a month or so im gonna throw a tantrum cos now my only professionally fitted bra doesnt FIT

Women be like “I’m sooooo bloated”

A REAL nut... Feels like every bone in your body comes out the head of your dick... Say no more. I'm done. Fall asleep in 2min.

Well. Right now I’m watching 9 golden retriever puppies get a bath at the groomer. Then I’ll choose a movie

Bf cooking me dinner and making enough to leave me a few days of food. I’m contributing by choosing a movie to watch

God it’s on brand that I accidentally faked amnesia in primary school

He thinks he’s an crock pot

It’s 8.32 and I’m on the waters already bc I flew too close to the sun having a shot of whiskey and a cocktail at dinner

I’m gonna get rly drunk if no one minds

This shirt is labelled a size 12 but I do not think it is a size 12

My cat loves my bf

Like mother like cat

⁉️

This is true btw. My shit’s fucked up and Kelsie fucked around in there

Bing bang theory

Dad got scan results back yesterday and is no evidence of disease! That’s the closest you get to cured with stage IV melanoma. Fuck he’s lucky, brain bleed, brain tumours, diabetic ketoacidosis, septic shock all in one year and now he’s 77kg (from 67), hair grown back, got a gf