Dan
@theSportress
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Has serious thoughts about the Canberra Raiders. Views my own and probably wrong. On Wurundjeri land. He/Him
Melbourne
Joined October 2014
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This might be the most embarrassing piece of copy ever produced by an Australian media company.
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It's wild how Mal was 150kg but also the fastest man on the planet
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Ben Hunt is better than Nathan Cleary. Make him the Australian halfback.
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Stop interviewing people during the game it’s genuinely the worst
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Me: oh racism? That's terrible. I hope the media handles it with tact and care
The media:
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The thing about rugby league is that Braith Anasta is a powerful player agent and the face of one of the major broadcasters and this is apparently fine
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NRL: “What’s the biggest problem in rugby league?”
ME: “Hmm probably the unequal spread of resources between teams, the lack of expansion into new markets and coaches that are too conservative to break from old methods”
NRL: ”....”
NRL: “I’m hearing scrums”
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when you see Kalyn Ponga around good players it becomes clear just how good he is.
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In Kayo's defence how could they have known people might want to watch the footy finals
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Hey rugby league historians. Raiders play bunnies today. Played the sharks last week. Surely this is the first time a team has played the prime ministers team two weeks in a row?
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Warnie ideas ranked:
1. I should bowl this Gatting bloke a big leggie
2. I should get into the South Africans or we’ll be out of the World Cup
...
1,784,361. Short (28 with fc ave of 23) should play test cricket
1,784,362. Money from a bookie?
1,784,363. Do I look fat ma?
‘The new Warner’: Warne’s left-field option to fix Aus batting woes:
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Everyone is hanging shit on Dufty but tell me a fullback that hasn’t been left in the dust by Matt Frawley and Adam Clune.
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That Jim Beam ad where they sing Sweet Caroline is the single most disgusting thing on television
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Brandy and Braith basically accused Storm of cheating the HIA system when Kafusi leaves field. Kafusi fails his HIA but no recognition or apology from Brandy and Braith.
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Sorry, "there are suggestions this is the most embarrassing copy ever produced by an Australian media company"
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Wife: “why are you so excited?”
Me: “well you see this guy I know from Raiders twitter who’s an absolute champ his sister is on that boat and I’m just super proud…”
Wife:…
Wife: “why are you like this?”
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Wayne Pearce is trying to destroy rugby league because it destroyed him in 1989
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Rugby league is a wonderful game run by some of the dumbest people you will ever meet
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This attempt to make Liam Martin the main character of origin is weird
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I think you have missed the point of the salary cap
Should minor premiers be given salary cap exemptions to accommodate the rise in player values?
#9NRLSFS
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The only “selection headache” should be how you break it to Marcus Harris
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I’m a grown man and a father and I still put on my Raiders jersey to watch a 6pm Friday game by myself.
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I know it's a small group and not representative of the entire fam base but Jesus this is shithouse behaviour
@PhilGould15
This is Simon the Canberra Raiders drummer being harassed by Bulldogs fans after the game.
Simon is so upset about this being verbally abused and at one point being knocked to the ground. 35 years supporting his team at away games this is the worst ever.
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Today we beat everyone. The sharks. The refs. Ourselves. What a win.
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Skull makes terrible jokes but he treats commentary like a job and actually watches first class cricket around the world. Mark Waugh barely watches international cricket.
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Are the panthers actually complaining Cleary had to travel 45 minutes for the dally m awards? Is that for real?
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Phil Gould may be a genius but he got outcoached by Fatty Vautin and I think we need to talk about this more.
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What if instead of three grades on game day we expanded the NRLW?
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Beat the Roosters. Beat the Sombrero. Beat the refs. Beat the commentators.
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@SydneyBluenose
"There are suggestions Australia's performance is improved by Adam Zampa not singing"
"It is unclear at this stage as to whether this relates to the outcome of the referendum"
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Another thing I’d like to point out - yet again Souths fans have proven to be the best people I meet in the rugby league world. Before and after last night I only had good interactions with them. How are the all so decent?
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Payne Haas’ punishment should be that he has to play for the Broncos.
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*Record scratch*
“Yep that’s me. You’re probably wondering how I got here”
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Courage. That's red hot courage. Gone form embarrassed to beaming with pride in a week. Stunning.
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Pitch: 360 but instead of the people that are on the show it’s other people.
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Proposal for new sport for 2024 olympics:
People dragging Americans for their idiotic olympics takes.
NRL twitter already favourites to bring home the gold for Australia.
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This meme is very good. If anyone knows who made it can they tell me? I would like to congratulate them.
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Guys I have this footage you might want to see
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Wonder if tennis has thought about adding a 2 point field goal to really add excitement.
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When Peter V’Landys started I thought he might be a historically bad administrator and I was right
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Fox ex player commentators ranking
Tier 1- begrudging respect: Brandy
Tier 2- I still hold a grudge but he is occasionally ok: Ennis
Tier 3 - just sometimes ok - Gaz
Tier 4 - the Queenslanders: all the Queenslanders and Bedsy for some reason
Tier 5 - Braith: Braith.
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I dunno, if I was supported a team from an area most famous for its pro-racist rally I might not boo the indigenous player, whom people don’t like because *checks notes* he’s good at footy.
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The year is 2072. Don-Furner’s-head-in-a-jar tells Channel 9 that it’s not coach Ricky-Stuart’s-head-in-a-jar’s fault the raiders haven’t won a premiership in 78 years.
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Fuckn good on the windies. Famous victory. I hope they enjoy it and I dream it leads to a new age of windies cricket.
Test cricket remains the best format. 20 over cricket can suck a bag.
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The NRL will literally do anything but fix the actual problem.
NRL to explore rookie draft in bid to bridge worrying gap between best and the rest 🧐💹❓
👉
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Haha fuck we are the most amazing wonderfully dumb and so goddamn courageous team sometimes. I love these lunatics!
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I hate to harp on something I've literally written an article about a fortnight ago but I cannot be happier for how X has proven (and improved) himself this year.
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I might need a stiff drink before I start writing. I'm overwhelmed.
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At some point in the next 48 hours my wife is going to give birth to our second so I think probably the review might be a bit late on Saturday.
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One of the fascinating things about no sport is people that don’t know anything about the NRL or rugby league feel the need to share their superficial and simplistic understanding of it
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Guys it might be the drinks talking but I reckon the Canberra Raiders are going to have a red hot go on Sunday and do us all proud
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I don’t care that it didn’t work out. We were rad this year. Fucking carn the Raiders. Up the milk.
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Raiders Review: Never Scared
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A new day brings endless possibilities. Unless you're a Raiders fan. Then it's only two: soul crushing loss or heart attack victory.
Happy game day.
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My toddler just saw me in a raiders jersey, and got upset and made me get his raiders jersey. He is now in his raiders jersey too and is happy. This is the best.
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I wrote last year that Peter V’Landys represented all the problems with rugby league and I never thought I’d be right so quickly
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Yep everyone really won from this
The sliding doors moment involving Reece Walsh and Charnze Nicoll-Klokstad is a rare example of a player transaction where all parties won.
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Elliott Whitehead we'll always love
You
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This was more about me venting than something people should actually read
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I am still wrapping my head around the fact momorovski wasn’t even penalised for that hit on Dearden.
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Controversial take but I think it would be ace if the Raiders could find a way to win tonight.
Happy game day
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Only the Raiders could be in 6th, somehow also with their season on the line, playing the last place team and this it all feels a 50/50 proposition. What a team, what a club.
Happy game day.
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Massive condolences to Sia Soliola who lost his mum this week. Cannot imagine the pain.
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If you see these posts it means you're rad and I hope you have a good evening and an even better 2023.
Up the Milk
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Canberra Raiders legend Laurie Daley has declared the Green Machine can take out this year's NRL premiership.
#NRL
#WeAreRaiders
#wearecbr
#rugbyleague
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I dunno I guess I’m actually feeling ok this morning. Like I’m sad, it’s raining, but I still love the Milk and reckon they’ll be good next year. Who wants a slightly awkward virtual hug?
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Is there anything more pure than Brad Schneider’s random smiling? He does it kicking goals. He was smiling again as he was about to ground the ball on his try. Dude is just happy and can’t hide it. You love to see it.
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BREAKING: For a second consecutive year, Peter V'landys and Andrew Abdo have saved the
#NRL
season. All the QLD hub details here:
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A salute to the great man's Raiders career
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