If you want to write a book, you should start today. Today's shit. Today's got almost nothing to recommend it, except it could be the day you started writing that amazing book. And then it will always be that day. This shit day will become a great day. I'd like that quite a lot
Pro tip: if you write the first line of your first novel tonight, then another tomorrow, you'll have been working on it for two years - which is an excellent conversational nugget at parties.
We got a dog. His name's Marlowe. As in Philip Marlowe. The puppy currently can't crack wise, solve crimes, or fall for dames, but I fully expect him to be Hertfordshire's No 1 mystery-solving hound within the year. You've been warned criminals.
Here's a bit of news: my second book will be called The Devil and the Dark Water. I'm really, atrociously proud of it. I can't wait for you to read it. It's got boats; it's got spooky stuff; it's got an impossible murder; a demon; and just the right folks to sort it out.
We are SO excited to reveal the title of
@stu_turton
's new novel, The Devil and the Dark Water.
A tale of murder on the high seas, a detective duo and a demon who may or may not exist...
Coming 1 October 2020 and available to pre-order from
@Waterstones
:
I wrote another book! Three in five years. I'm on fire! It's called The Last Murder at the End of the World and it's a utopian/dystopian murder mystery set on an island that holds the last 122 human beings. I very much hope you enjoy it!
I'd like to introduce the latest member of our crack marketing team. This is my daughter, Emilia Allegra Turton, who'll shortly - and shamelessly - be using her face to sell you my books. Please welcome her to the team everybody. She's trouble.
Twitter meet my little girl, Ada. She's fucking awesome. Brexit. She'll sort it. Cancer. Cured. War, famine, inequality, racism? Quietly confident she'll have them eradicated by Thursday.
Hello. I haven't looked at Twitter all day and when I do it turns out Seven Deaths is going to be on Netflix. That's nice, isn't it? Anybody got strong ideas on who they want in it. You never know who's listening.
Erm, apparently we've sold loads of copies of
#sevendeaths
. Quick bit of maths tells me it's 99,993 more than I was expecting. You guys really are the best. Thank you so much for buying it, recommending it, talking about it, and giving me a career. I'm now your bestie.
We are beyond thrilled to announce that The Seven Deaths of Evelyn Hardcastle has now sold OVER 100,000 COPIES in hardback and paperback! Huge congratulations to the one and only
@stu_turton
! 🎉🎉🎉🎉🎉
Writing The Devil and the Dark Water was really hard. Soon as I started my life imploded, then kept on imploding. I'll be honest, at one point I wasn't even sure I'd finish it. Yesterday,
@thesundaytimes
named it their historical fiction book of the year. I'm so fucking proud.
Wonderful to see
@stu_turton
’s The Devil and the Dark Water picked as historical fiction Book of the Year in
@thesundaytimes
! In fantastic company too.
I'm leaving twitter to finish writing my next book. 2018 has been incredible, thanks to you lot. Every kind word, every copy of Seven Deaths bought, sold, and recommended - you'll never know how much it meant. Enjoy the holidays. I'll be back in March with my new book, or on it.
Four years ago I sat down to write The Seven Deaths of Evelyn Hardcastle. It's out today. I hope you enjoy it. I hope it keeps you awake until 2am, and when you finish it there's a huge smile on your face. Those are the books I love, and I wanted to write one. Hopefully, I have.
Last Murder is the third book I've written, but this stage never gets any less scary. Strangers are going to read my weird murder mystery, and have opinions on it. And they may not like it. And then what? If anybody's got a huge hole I can hide in for a while, I'd appreciate it.
😍 They're here! And they're perfect!
Proof copies of
@stu_turton
's The Last Murder at the End of the World have landed!
The end of the world is coming March 2024...
I'm so proud of this book. It's epic and intimate; daft until it isn't; the characters shouldn't be in a murder mystery, but have to deal with one any way. I feel like I wrote most of it by banging my head against a keyboard. Come have a read. It'll make me smile.
🔥 We're giving away some proof copies of
@Stu_turton
’s The Last Murder at the End of the World exclusively in the
@BloomsburyRaven
newsletter! 🌍 🔪
Sign up here to get the newsletter:
Genuinely don't believe there's ever been a more beautiful book. Please buy one. The Last Murder at the End of the World is out in a week, and I'm absolutely shitting myself.
Bloody hell, I've been nominated for the
@CostaBookAwards
First Novel Award! I thought I'd reached peak happiness, but then my wife
@maresamanara
got Photoshopping. Huge thanks to
@BloomsburyRaven
,
@harryillers
, and everybody who's spread the good word for getting me here.
Seven Deaths won Crime Novel of the Year 2019 in the Złoty Kościej contest in Poland. I won't lie, the award is going to haunt my every dream for the rest of the year, but yay for awards.
The BIGGEST congratulations to
@stu_turton
and The Last Murder at the End of the World!
Straight in at NUMBER ONE on the Sunday Times hardback fiction bestseller chart this week! Thank you to all of the booksellers, readers and champions of this very special book 🎉 🎈 🎊 🥂
Hallo. I've been trying to figure out funny things to say to convince you to buy my book, but, actually, I just think you might like it. It's got a demon. It's got a boat. It's got best mates having an adventure, and it's a big, proper, locked-room mystery. Okay. Bye.
The Last Murder at the End of the World is out today! It took me three years to write. I tossed away 111k words that weren’t working, and I’m so proud of it. I hope you enjoy it. I hope it keeps you up past your bedtime. I hope it transports you. Let me know. I’ll be here.
Happy New Year everybody. You're all marvellous. I'm disappearing for a while to write another book. I'll pop in occasionally to check my messages, but otherwise this corner of twitter is going quiet. Can somebody water the plants? Don't look for me, I was never really here.
I want my books to feel totally different to each other. Different characters, different genre mix, different writing style, different style of deduction, different pace. That's a longwinded way of saying I just looked at my latest and said out loud 'what the fuck have you done?'
Sorry to bother you this bank holiday, but I've written a book. It's set in 1634, aboard a haunted boat. Impossible, spooky things happen, and a very clever detective has to sort it out. If you'd like to buy such a story, Forbidden Planet have a very beautiful edition. See ya.
Not saying I've peaked or anything, but I'm seriously considering retiring. Thanks to all the booksellers for pushing
#sevendeaths
so much. Look what we did.
I’m at the stage of the novel where I can see the themes clearly, and understand what it’s trying to say underneath all the murder, and detection. It’s nice. I lean back in my seat and think ‘Stu, you’ve got issues, pal.’
The Devil and the Dark Water has been optioned for telly, and the brilliant Howard Overman is writing it. If you watched The Terror and thought, "pffft, what they need is somebody a bit like Sherlock Holmes" Devil's got you covered friends.
📺 TV NEWS! 📺
We are incredibly excited to share the news that
@stu_turton
's The Devil and the Dark Water has been optioned for TV by
@UrbanMythFilms
, with the script written by
@HowardUMF
!
Full details here:
Last night, The Devil and the Dark Water won the Viktor Crime Award in Germany. I'm mad chuffed. I just wanted to thank the judges, Sebastian Fitzek for donating the prize, and my publisher
@KlettCottaTweet
. It was good news when I needed some. Thank you everybody.
If an author tops the Sunday Times bestseller list and the Sunday Times doesn’t print the list this week did it really happen? Bit gutted, as I’ll likely never do it again and I wanted my mum to see it in the paper.
The paperback of The Seven Deaths of Evelyn Hardcastle is out today! Ada is very excited to get started. She's not a hardback reader. Tiny hands, you see.
The Devil and the Dark Water is on the Times bestseller list, amongst some absolutely monstrously brilliant novels. You guys are the best and you're all invited to my house for cocktail hour. Put your orders in now. Thank you, guys!
We've sold over 100,000 copies of The Devil and the Dark Water in the UK. If you bought one, or encouraged somebody to buy one, you have all my thanks. Writing books is hard. Selling them is even harder. Thanks
@BloomsburyRaven
. You're the best.
🎉HUGE congratulations to
@stu_turton
for selling 100,000 copies of The Devil and the Dark Water!🎉
In context, that's:
563,000,000 total pages
1.6 nautical miles of books, spine out
15 times the length of the Cutty Sark
A copy for every person living in the Seychelles
Woohoo!
Allo chums. The Devil and the Dark Water has a cover now. Somehow, I think it's even more beautiful than the Seven Deaths cover. Take a look, and stare at those waves. The secrets start on the cover for this one. Fuck me, I'm so excited. I can't wait for you to read it.
A murder on the high seas.
A remarkable detective duo.
A demon who may or may not exist...
We're beyond excited to reveal the cover for
@stu_turton
's extraordinary new novel, The Devil and the Dark Water, coming 1 October 2020
Pre-order now:
This will come as absolutely no surprise to anybody who knows me, but I have no fucking clue what I'm doing. Buy one of my books, will ya? At this rate, the next one will be along in 26 years.
The Devil and the Dark Water is going to be a board game! My incredible Italian publisher have partnered with boardgame maker Giochiuniti - and look at the box art! Look at it! I can't wait to play it.
Hey everybody! My book is out in the US today! It's called the The 1/2 Devil and the Dark Water and... just kidding. One title this time. We've learned our lesson.
First day back in after a week off, & I can finally share these beauties with the world. It’s the stunning proofs of The Devil and the Dark Water!
Booksellers - holler at your reps; bloggers - the first 2 chapters are on Netgalley; & authors, if you would like one let me know!
⚡️ Exciting reveal! ⚡️
Stunning proofs are in for
@stu_turton
's extraordinary new tale of murder, adventure and mystery,
#TheDevilandtheDarkWater
⚓️
Just look at that spot UV gloss! 😍
As is customary, Ada has now claimed the award and is taking total credit for writing the book. Thank you so much
@booksaremybag
for the
#BAMBReadersAwards
. It means the world.
The Devil and the Dark Water is out tomorrow in paperback. To be upfront, if you buy it I get your soul to keep in my cupboard. Small price to pay for seafaring hijinks though, right?
Dementia is awful, but my dad’s just watched Die Hard for what he thinks is the first time. And we get to do it for the first time again tomorrow! Silver linings and all that.
It appears some of you haven't bought my book, The Last Murder at the End of the World. Don't make me come round to your house and beg. Like properly beg. With tears. And pleading. It would be really sad for both of us. Mostly me I admit. Please buy a book.
We won! Ada's grabbed the Books Are My Bag Novel Award, because, let's not lie, she won it on my behalf. Thank you so much everybody! Thanks for talking about
#sevendeaths
. Reviewing it. Recommending it. Selling it. Buying it, and voting for it. So fucking chuffed.
The Devil and the Dark Water is out in a week. I'll be honest, I'm a lot more nervous than I expected to be. Might have to spend the intervening period drinking.
I decided to read a few pages of The Last Passenger before bed. I finished the fucking thing at 3am. You shouldn't treat friends this way,
@willrdean
. Absolutely devoured it. It's such a great idea, and it moves like a damn comet. He's really good, and he's totally wrecked my day
The Devil and the Dark Water sails into the US today as a paperback. It's a supernatural, Sherlock Holmes-esque murder mystery on a boat. It's like 7 1/2 Deaths, but completely different. A bunch of people die. If you buy it, I owe you a pint. Byeeeee.
Happy
#worldbookday
everybody. When I was a kid a neighbour bought me a stack of 10p Agatha Christie novels. By doing that, she changed my entire fucking life. Cheers Doris. You're a gem.
Thank you so much for all your publication day messages. Sorry I haven’t been able to respond to everybody, I’m still looking after this chickenpoxed baby. Just wanted to let you know it means so much!
This is Ada. And me. In hats. Thanks for buying my book. You paid for pretty much everything in this picture, except the bakery behind us. I have no idea who bought that.
Being on
@BBCTwo
#BetweenTheCovers
was fantastic, but the best bit was Ada watching me on telly, getting confused, then trying to feed me a strawberry.
#Sevendeaths
is number 6 on the Sunday Times Bestseller list! You lot! You lovely lot!! Come here, we're having a group hug. And, as is traditional, here's a picture of Ada holding the book, because this is next level adorable and if I try to contain this power it'll destroy me.
Hi pals! The Winter Spirits is out next week and it's fucking great. Every single author in the collection is writing out of their skin, and the stories are truly unhinged. Unfortunately, the tea in this promotional photo is much too dark, undermining the entire effort. One star.
The Devil and the Dark Water is
@Waterstones
Thriller of the Month. I couldn't be more chuffed! I also get to watch my three year old be delighted when she sees 'daddy's book' in the window, which is as wonderful as you'd except.
Our Thriller of the Month is the deliciously sinister new period chiller from
@stu_turton
, author of the acclaimed bestseller The Seven Deaths of Evelyn Hardcastle. Discover our exclusive edition here:
The best part of writing a book is other people's contributions to it. Look at those colours! The sprayed edges! Everything! God, I love this job. PS. Please please please please buy my book. I'll be your best friend and make you lots of tea.
Just look at how gorgeous the Goldsboro exclusive edition of
@stu_turton
's The Last Murder at the End of the World is 😍
With shiny sprayed edges, this signed limited run special edition is every bookworm's dream!
Hurry and pre-order your copy:
My daughter wrote her first book today. It’s called The Jelly Fish is Very Odd. She misspelled every word and the jelly fish isn’t actually that odd, but it’s the best fucking book ever. I’m nominating it for the Booker, then letting my heart explode from pride.
Fuck me, I've been shortlisted in the New Writer category for the National Book Awards. Now, I'm not advocating bribery per se, but if any of the judges are reading this, I've got a bag of almost-untouched Jelly Babies which could be yours.
Dear reader, let's work out when you're going to read Seven Deaths! I don't want to be responsible for slaughtering hours of your reading time - but I will! History will look upon you favourably if you read it! Don't be a tough guy. Don't be a fool! I will call you later.
Ada's just heard that
#sevendeaths
is number 5 on the Sunday Times bestseller list! Huge thanks to all the brilliant booksellers; every wonderful person who bought and reviewed it; and team
@BloomsburyRaven
for creating such a beautiful book.
@harryillers
was involved a bit, too.
Happy
#WorldBookDay
everybody. My daughter started reading books this year - well, remembering them out loud. That's pretty good, but the best bit is that she pronounces sat/sit as shat/shit, which cracks me up EVERY SINGLE TIME. See you soon friends.
My daughter's face upon learning
#sevendeaths
has been shortlisted for a Dead Good Readers Award. She went on to say that she'd like you to vote with your heart and not be swayed by her father's blatant emotional manipulation. Have at it here:
The Last Murder at the End of the World is out on Thursday. Here’s a pretty trailer! One question: How on earth is this big, daft idea now a book? I was only thinking about it five minutes ago. Fuck me. Buy it please.
Time is running out to stop the end of the world...
From the award-winning author of The Seven Deaths of Evelyn Hardcastle, comes a new dazzling murder mystery 🤩
Discover all the gorgeous editions of The Last Murder at the End of the World:
If anybody wants to buy The Devil and the Dark Water today, I'm doing a special offer. I'm giving away a free 'thank you' with every copy. No proof of purchase necessary. Just tell me you've bought it and I'll say thank you. Honestly. What a time to be alive.
There's a lot of books out today. If yours is one of them, please tell me about it below. I don't have all the followers in the world, but they're all lovely and they all buy books. Let's call this Stu's Bookshop Twitter Window.
Devil and the Dark Water is £1.09 on Kindle today. Yes. £1.09. The weirest price that's ever been slapped on anything, but still cheap. It's got a boat in it. And a demon. And a detective. And SHENANIGANS!
Ada's home and causing trouble again after her op. Thanks to everybody who asked after her, offered a kind word, or was so understanding when I delayed the
@Writers_Artists
masterclass. The staff of
@EvelinaLondon
are magicians and we're grateful.
Happy new year everybody. You lot are the fucking* best. I couldn't ask for a nicer group of friends, followers, readers, and fellow oddballs. *That's my last swear of 2020. Ada's now copying everything I say, so it's PG-Stu from here on out. Fuck's sake.
Guys, while you slept, I've rearranged the shelves of every bookshop in the UK to put
#sevendeaths
front and centre. Don't worry, I've also cancelled your telly/gym/job, so you'll have the time to buy and read my book instead. No need to thank me, it's a public service.
Early reviews are going up for The Last Murder at the End of the World, and I just wanted to say 'thank you' to anybody who's taken the time to put their thoughts down. I'm incredibly nervous about this book - it's a big swing - and it's lovely to hear people's responses. Ta pals
It's all about the good news this week - first it was the US election, then the potential vaccine and now... two new books by
@stu_turton
! Coming from
@BloomsburyRaven
in the near future They will be brilliant. And bonkers.
I want to share a cutting-edge motivational technique. Today I have written 3,912 words, of which 3,911 were fucking terrible. Thankfully, I have this picture of Ada in baby jail, which is where her life is headed if I don't write better words. See, told you it was cutting edge.
Would you like to buy The Devil and the Dark Water? I know you've got a TBR pile planes have to veer around. I know you want to re-read your favourite book, but first you've got the new one by X, and there's that series you love. So many books... One more can't hurt, can it?
Oooh forgot to mention that Ada is one now. ONE! That means the warranty's up and we can't take her back. On the bright side, she's funny, very cheeky, daft as cats and extraordinarily cute. She's also excellent at pointing at things. Christ, she's one.
The 1/2 Deaths of Evelyn Hardcastle is released in the US today! I caught Ada sneaking a read when she should have been developing motor skills. That's how good it is! Seriously, this book was a total joy to write. I loved every minute. I hope you feel the same reading it.
Guys. Paw Patrol. I can't be the only person desperate for backstory I'm never going to get, right? Ryder appears to be an eight-year-old, genius, billionaire. I assume those pups are genetically modified. And where is, you know, the rest of civilisation?
I'm on the shortlist for the HWA Debut Crown! Victory is within sight. I just need to stab, poison, push and otherwise do-away with my competition in grand historical fashion. Let the plotting commence.
If you'd like to read the prologue for The Last Murder at the End of the World it's up online. If you do read it, could you please make sure you're playing the Countdown clock music in the background. They really do go together. Man, I wrote another book. Still weird.
As we count down the days until
@stu_turton
's THE LAST MURDER AT THE END OF THE WORLD is published, we have a treat for you!
Read the prologue of this incredible book exclusively on the
@Waterstones
website
👉
This exclusive edition is out 28th March!
The Devil and the Dark Water is shortlisted for the HWA Gold Crown Award! This is brilliant, but according to the smallprint you all have to buy it, or Historia come round and sprinkle pox on all your other books. I KNOW! History, right? Still, better safe than poxy
Apologies to everybody attending the
@Writers_Artists
masterclass on Tuesday. I've had to postpone it a week. My daughter's operation has been brought forward, so I'll be in hospital instead of telling you how I screwed up Seven Deaths, and how to avoid my mistakes. Ada says soz
I've never given Alison an easy book to edit, but I know book 3 nearly killed her and my US editor
@ShanaDrehs
. Book 4 will be about an author who kills two innocent editors by handing them a hugely ambitious, utterly insane manuscript that causes their brains to explode.
@stu_turton
I cannot wait to share the title and a cover and everything with readers soon. It is *such* a brilliantly bonkers, imaginative, clever novel with a brilliant puzzle and an amazing countdown and I love it. And so will you all, I predict.
*scatters tiny wooden birds in path*
スチュアート・ダートンの新作「名探偵と海の悪魔(THE DEVIL AND THE DARK WATER)」を購入。背置きだったので手に取ってビックリ!美しい装丁!「イヴリン嬢は七回殺される」では緑の表紙だったが、今回は碧!あらすじは読むだけでワクワクする!ヴェルヌやクトゥルフも入ってる?優先変えて読もうか。
If you've always wanted to write a book, today's a fucking great day to start. Reckon I'll need something to read in a couple of years, and it could be whatever you begin now. How cool would that be?