Howard Bender
@rotobuzzguy
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Head of Content @FantasyAlarm , Writer @nypostsports , #FSGA & #FSWA Award-Winning Host for @SiriusXMFantasy #LABR champ #FFPieBet #phish @Chrisck5 is my BFF
Half Moon Bay, CA
Joined January 2010
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Julius unexpectedly crossed the Rainbow Bridge today. I am beyond devastated. Fucking cancer tumor growing in his stomach. I'll be taking the next couple of days off from social media. Rest in peace, my sweet baby boy.
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Please send all the good vibes to Baby Blaze this morning. She's having surgery today.
#FuckCancer
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Are you fucking serious? Way to go, people. Way to continuously prove that our species fucking sucks.
I don't give a shit what side of the fence you sit on politically, this has to stop.
Highland Park, Illinois today. Fourth of July parade. An affluent suburb of Chicago.
We’re terrorizing the kids. And one another…
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Guess who just got the ALL CLEAR after her final cancer treatment today!!!!
Just routine check-ups & booster shots every 6 months now!!!
#BabyBlaze
#fuckcancer
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Personal Post:
I don't normally post stuff like this about myself, but today I am comfortably fitting into a 2XL shirt for the first time in probably 3 years. Baby steps on the wieght loss, but just feeling good about myself.
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When I'm dead and buried and they ask what it was that caused the heart attack, say hello to chicken & waffles pizza
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Still blown away by what
@phish
did for
#YEMSG
last week. Just amazing. This is the video my wife (
@doobiejsf
) took.
#phish
@Chrisck5
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Too many conflicting reports on whether Kobe's children were with them. Stop trying to be first, people. Accuracy first is of the utmost importance.
#NBA
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I still believe my season-long bet of 1,100 yards & 8 TD is going to cash against
@JimBowdenGM
but as promised on the
@FantasyAlarm
Show last week on
@SiriusXMFantasy
, if Allen Lazard didn't get double-digit targets in Week 2, I would dye my hair green.
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Just a heads up to all those trying to break into the
#FantasySports
business --
Telling me you won't or even that you just don't want to work weekends is an IMMEDIATE no from me. We ALL make sacrifices to get what we want. Don't think you're any different.
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ADOPT, YOU IDIOTS!!!!! Stop buying these inbred, puppy-mill products. So many dogs and cats out there who just need some love and attention.
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Guess who just got another ALL-CLEAR on her scans today...?
Baby Blaze, that's who!
#FuckCancer
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Another 3-month check-up in the books and Baby Blaze is still...
CANCER-FREE, MUTHAFUCKAS!!!!!!
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Not to be an opportunistic S.O.B. but I just found Spencer Ware still available in three leagues.
#LearnToHandcuff
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Just STFU and vote. I don't need to see your sticker. I don't need to hear your opinions on who you voted for or why. Just be a responsible adult, get off your ass and vote if you haven't done so already.
I love you all.
#ElectionDay
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Thoughts & prayers for
@JimBowdenGM
please.
My man is really going through something today. Please respect his privacy in these tough times
#HowBoutThemCowboys
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I would like to personally thank the Los Angeles
#Rams
for putting an end to all the
#Cowboys
nonsense on the
@FantasyAlarm
Show on
@SiriusXMFantasy
. Not sure my body could have handled another week of incessant vomitting.
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Ever since she came home from surgery, he's never left her side. Even if it means just being her pillow.
#GottaJibboo
#BabyBlaze
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#Chiefs
season spiraling out of control thanks to Andy Reid. GIVE KAREEM HUNT THE FUCKING BALL!!!!!!!
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Collinsworth trying to name a professional wrestler, comes up with Gorgeous George?? GET HIM THE F*** OUT OF THE BOOTH!!!!
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Thank you all so much for the positive vibes and outpouring of love. Biopsy pending but Baby Blaze is on her way home.
Please send all the good vibes to Baby Blaze this morning. She's having surgery today.
#FuckCancer
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Official apology to
@ESPNFantasy
Taysom Hill's player capsule does note that his TE eligibility can be removed at any point this season & a tweet from
@MikeClayNFL
dated 4/29 states it as well.
I am sorry for my negative comments towards them.
CC:
@MatthewBerryTMR
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Al Michaels & Cris Collinsworth with the role of the spaghetti being played by Patrick Mahomes' penis.
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The
@FantasyAlarm
#FAmily
, the
#fantasysports
industry & the world lost an amazing man last night. Rest in both peace & power
@gasdoc_spit
. I'm going to miss you so much, Andy.
#FuckCancer
#CancerSucks
#ButteredStonesForever
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Look at what my wife bought me. And now I have like, the freshest cereal.
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30 years of friendship & 17 years of marriage!
What a woman!
Happy anniversary,
@doobiejsf
!!!!
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You wanna know WHAT'S IN THE BOX,
#FANation
? Big thanks to everyone at
@FantasyAlarm
@SiriusXMFantasy
&
@FantasySportsTA
!!!
@JimBowdenGM
& I are truly honored and humbled.
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What do you wanna bet the new guy who works in the Twitter Verification Department has been asking me
#fantasyfootball
start/sits...?
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The
#SFB12
live drafts in San Francisco are in the books! Thank you
@ScottFish24
for letting me host. What an AMAZING crew! More photos and videos to come!
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Myles Garrett is a piece of garbage.
#Browns
been dirty all might but this is beyond ridiculous.
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Always a fan of doing your own thing but I've never understood this -- wearing your Titans jersey to a Chiefs/Ravens playoff game?
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Honored to accept the
@FSGAtweets
award for Best Video Content! So proud of the
@FantasyAlarm
team. Everyone worked their asses off to produce some amazing shows!!
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Daaaaang. Look at the manager of the 2020 World Series champs dropping picks like Nostradamus
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We interrupt this weekend's coverage of
@phish
@SphereVegas
to announce...
It's on baby!!
#SFB14
SF Live Drafts gonna be 🔥🔥🔥 Thanks as always
@ScottFish24
&
@FantasyCaresOrg
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Your
#fantasyfootball
questions will be answered shortly. Took a breather from work today to get new ink.
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Name a movie that never gets enough love but you can watch over and over.
I'll start it off with She's Out of My League
#SlapshotRegatta
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Wife: Michael Keaton is Batman again?
Me: It's a multiverse thing like they did with Spiderman.
Wife: Multiverse?
Me:
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if at any point over the last 72 hours I told you to start Gronk. I changed my mind......
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and if my aunt had balls, she'd be my uncle
🤦♂️
If Puka Nacua were to maintain his current pace, he would shatter Michael Thomas' NFL single-season record by 63 receptions 🤯
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Put the Pro Bowl in Vegas, they said. What could possibly go wrong?
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Wife said she wanted dinner on the table when she got home from work so I did what I do best...
BREAKFAST ANYTIME!!
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Well,
#FantasySports
Twitter, you never cease to amaze me. I just want to say with all the sincerity in my heart -- thank you. The out-pour of sympathy and emotion over these last few days has been overwhelming.
Thank you so much, and much love from me to all of you!
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Wishing all my fellow tribe-mates a very Happy Chanukah!!!
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Hey
@tkelce
&
@Chiefs
-- please make this girl's dream come true in Week 4 and show her just how much of a hero her dad is for trying to do this for her! There's too much garbage in the world to ignore a request for love! Thanks!
@SiriusXMFantasy
@rotobuzzguy
I live in michigan, my daughter has had several surgeries on her ears to help her hear. She is a huge Kelce fan. Going to chiefs game at Ford field. Trying everything to reach Kelce to meet her. It would be her wish come true. Trying to get his attention for it.
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Well that just fucking sucks. Why are we giving the ball to Allen at the 1?
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Me: Just wanted to let you know I'm back home from the conference.
Wife: How was it?
Me: Great. Had my first White Claw.
Wife: ::click::
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I get that he's excited for the season but Cris Collinsworth is unlistenable
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What is "Fuck Cancer"?
Jeopardy! is saddened to share that Alex Trebek passed away peacefully at home early this morning, surrounded by family and friends. Thank you, Alex.
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I answer every single question I get on Twitter, Facebook, the
@FantasyAlarm
forums and email. Every single one. Would that deserve your vote here? Please and thank you!
Congratulations to all of our nominees for 'Most Outstanding Social Media'! Winners will be announced at the 2018 FSTA Winter Conference
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@OBJ_3
You mean you COULDN'T care less. If you're gonna throw shade at millions of your fans, at least use the proper phrase. xoxo a fantasy editor
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MORNING HOT TAKE:
IT'S NOT A FUCKING PITCH COUNT!
THERE ARE NO PITCHERS IN FOOTBALL!
CALL IT A LIMITED SNAP COUNT OR GET THE FUCK OUT OF THIS BUSINESS AND MY MENTIONS!
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The coolest wife in the world (
@Doobiej
) just dropped off lunch to the Shed!
#NationalSandwichDay
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I routinely pick fights with my wife so she'll storm off into the bedroom and then I can watch whatever I want on TV.
#ConfessionsOfAQuarantinedMan
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You know what needs to go? How about all of these stupid meme/engagement tweets telling you one has to go.
Who gives a shit? None of the items are EVER going to go, so who cares?
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Shout it out to Del Griffith!
Hope he finds someplace nice to celebrate Thanksgiving today.
#ShowerRingDivision
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BOOOOOM!!!! 💰
The
#NFLDraft
ticket I've been sitting on for months and telling you about on the
@FantasyAlarm
Show on
@SiriusXMFantasy
!
Let's go
#DirtyBirds
!!
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Dear
@ESPNFANSUPPORT
&
@ESPNFantasy
--
Your product sucks and your support team is terrible and a little condescending as well. No ability to make changes or customize? I guess you get what you pay for.
No more leagues with you & zero recommendations to others.
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To all my
#FantasyFootball
baby birds -- If you're drafting 4th or lower and Zeke is there, YOU TAKE ZEKE!!!! Just be sure to handcuff to Pollard in the 6th or 7th and you're covered. Stop whining about your first pick and focus on the rest of your draft!!
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Not sure who this announcer is in the Chiefs game, but he really needs to take Mahomes' penis out of his mouth before he speaks.
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There seem to be a LOT of porn bots out there who play
#fantasyfootball
and they ALL like the advice I'm doling out.
#winning
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It's both
#NationalDogDay2019
AND
#InternationalDogDay2019
????
Say hello to the Wolfpack of Half Moon Bay (Julius, Tweezer & Baby Blaze)
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Thank you to those who have checked in. We are safe at home. Our hearts go out to those affected by the shootings here in Half Moon Bay.
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The band is back together!!
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To all my beautiful
#fantasyfootball
babies: I promise to answer all your Week 11 start/sit questions well ahead of lineup lock, but please be patient. It's the RotobuzzGal's 50th birthday celebration this weekend & she's No. 1 on my depth chart.
#FANation
@FantasyAlarm
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I love my man Fabs but....
😂😂😂
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Guess who's moving WAY WAY up my draft boards!!!
Pete Alonso is going to donate $1,000 to animal shelters for every home run he hits during the 2024 season
"Hopefully there's a lot of homers and we get to save a lot of animals."
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Killer add to an already killer staff!!!
Old friend, new guy.
Everyone give a warm welcome to our newest staffer,
@footballdiehard
!
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I LOVE when people give me shit for crapping on Marshawn Lynch, saying he's a thug w/ no heart for the game & then he does this.
#punkbitch
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Am I burnt out on football or is Better Off Dead that great a movie?
I'm locked in.
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@TakingThePoint5
Not everyone can cram all of their league drafts in between Labor Day and Week 1 kickoff. I play in 20 different leagues and commission 5 of them. Hardly consider myself a rookie.
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Nothing says "good morning" like rolling out of bed to take a pie to the face. Never again,
@JimBowdenGM
! No more
#SidePie
!
#FFPieBet
@FantasyAlarm
@SiriusXMFantasy
@Childrens_Fund
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The growing trend of people trying to make a name for themselves in the fantasy industry by tearing down others already established is incredibly disappointing.
Couldn't even imagine trolling
@MatthewBerryTMR
@RonShandler
or
@LennyMelnick
when I was trying to break in
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Rolling through my timeline & LOVING the
#Patriots
fans coming @ me for how much team paid to have AB for 1 week. So indignant.
The equivalent of "I know you are but what am I?"
Get over it. You tried to get one over on the league & it backfired. Take your medicine and STFU!
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Told the kids I need to "inspect" their candy before they could have it.
Oh wait....I dont have kids.
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The most important
#SuperBowl
prop bet of all time and we dont even get to see the color of the Gatorade? Worst. Super. Bowl. Ever.
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