Simon PhD “One of Those Gays”
@realsimonsz
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21,689
Following
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Media
4,220
Statuses
29,929
Father•Husband•Aspiring Meathead 🇺🇸🇷🇺🇭🇺 Russian-Hungarian from Siberia 💪 the fruity section of HEB
Your Dad’s Bed in ATX
Joined July 2020
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Pinned Tweet
Your life is defined by the choices you make every day.
You can either spend your time reading my book or you can spend it utilizing the knowledge after reading my book.
Either way, you should read my book.
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I’m too lazy to shave or smile this morning
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Based on a popular demand, I asked my husband for the sticker.
Now go vote fellas.
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“Simon, you already posted this view!”
I did. And so what?
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“Straight curious. So straight that I already learned all the abbreviations, slang, and what apps to use.”
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That walmart light did me back some wonders.
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For the first time in several decades, LGBT acceptance is dropping. What do you think needs to be done to change that?
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Thankful for the gainz this Thanksgiving.
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I think my undercover FBI agent look was a success.
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Being a masculine girl is okay. Being a feminine boy is okay.
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Right now if I were to post these Christmas family photos in Russia, I’d be charged a fine for spreading gay propaganda.
In the US, I can post it and live my life.
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I think I ate this bank bathroom lighting. But I’m still hungry for more meat.
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The pants I wore today made me feel hot but getting that “I love your pants!” compliment from the cashier was worth it.
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“Simon, you post pictures of your body and nothing else.”
You mean this body???? 🥹
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DL dudes be like “sorry can’t show my face” and then send you a pic with the gayest and most identifiable iPhone case ever.
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I am tired but the titties be titty’ing.
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@ZubyMusic
The whole “freedoms back concept” is also very backwards.
The government that took away your rights and then promised to give them back under certain conditions will always violate its promise.
The government should not grant freedoms but protect them.
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Had new swimwear delivered today. Thoughts?
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Felt titty thicc cute. Might do stuff later
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@disclosetv
I’m a grateful immigrant to the US.
This anthem means a lot to me.
I’m shocked to see y’all hate y’all’s country so much.
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As a philosophy student, I am a strong believer in 2 leg days. And mine is done.
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Hi. It’s me. I’m the gym shorts, it’s me.
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Someone called this the Simon pose and cannot unhear it.
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You don't hate capitalism.
You hate that someone else might be better than you.
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Idk if you can tell but I dyed my hair blonde and now they’re just blue.
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The long shoelaces compensate the shortness of my shorts.
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@disclosetv
Correct me if I’m wrong but there are 2 states adjacent to the capitol.
Want statehood? Join those states.
DC was founded on the basis of no statehood.
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Love my new glasses. I think they accentuate my eyes very well.
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I can’t decide which one delivers so here’s 2 pics
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@NoContextBrits
Conquered the world for spices yet have the blandest food you can imagine.
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As a gay man, I’ve been sexually harassed by women very often. From verbal to physical abuse. None were held accountable.
I even reported one girl to HR for grabbing my ass but they said “let’s not disrupt the workflow with unnecessary unproven accusations.”
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Radical gym selfie-ism.
Ни стыда, ни совести зато с сисями.
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I never wore braces. I have plenty of other traumas though.
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Front pillows are coming through. Now ready for a bath.
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Bought myself some tights for leg days.
Excited to start filming all the “why do they stare” vids for attention while squatting
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You make money — you pay taxes.
From already taxed money you save enough to buy a house — you pay taxes on that house.
Then from your already taxed money you pay more taxes.
In TX it’s 3% that forces millions to sell and downgrade.
In America you can pay off your house but if you don’t pay property tax they take your house. YOUR HOUSE.
For a “free” country, we never truly own anything.
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“95% of your personality is gym!”
No. 25% being a very corny gay. 25% telling corny jokes. 25% gym. 55% taking narcissistic selfies. And 69% being good at Maths.
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@disclosetv
Real journalists get suspended to let the propaganda do its thing.
Sounds like Russia.
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@ZubyMusic
Vandalizing Churchill’s statue or a church — it’s fine.
Quoting the Bible — hate speech.
Mkay...
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Sending good vibes to all the Midesternites cuz their fall weather sucks while Texans still enjoy the short shorts seezn 🙌
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Since I was born in a different hemisphere (sorry flat earthers), happy bday to me.
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@ZubyMusic
She probably took a class: "How to be victimized any situation no matter what 101" or something.
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@lporiginalg
Man: “Hi! I think you look wonderful!”
Woman: “Stop sexualizing me!”
*5 min later
Woman: “Why is it so hard to find someone?!?!?!?!”
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