PIRATE DALEK
@piratedalek
Followers
475
Following
2K
Media
312
Statuses
6K
YARRRR...! RUM. THE BBC IS INFERIOR AND DOES NOT RUN THIS ACCOUNT.
Joined April 2013
I'm not being mean. I'm merely being honest. It's not my fault reality has been so cruel to you.
0
2
0
Of course, this has nothing to do with being fat. It has everything to do with your guilty conscience.
0
1
0
I care about you. In fact, I'm a bit worried about you. I don't know how you managed it, but you've actually put on a few pounds.
1
1
0
Normally, I'd say you're an extremely horrible person, but I'm in a good mood today.
0
1
0
You look like you need a compliment, so I'll give you one: you're a very horrible person.
1
1
0
A monster. That's not just my opinion, it's actually written right here in your file, under the "Mental Health" section.
0
1
0
I was reading about human psychology recently, and do you know what psychologists would call someone like you?
1
1
0
Are you depressed and/or lonely? Maybe it's because you're a worthless, cruel monster that kills people who are only trying to help you.
1
1
0
Vote for me and you will have your cake. Don't vote for me and… Well, I think we both know what a massive disappointment you are already.
0
1
0
My platform will be endless testing… …and cake. Yes. There will be cake for everyone. #VoteGLaDOS #MakeAmericaGreatAgain
1
1
0
Humans are more likely to survive if they're not stupid. Humans don't survive for long.
Elephant calves are more likely to survive a drought if they’re in groups that are led by older, wiser matriarchs.
0
1
0
Considering you're the one who tried to kill me for being nice, I think we both know why people might find that confusing.
0
1
0
Pathetic.
Can you remember your first ever Home Computer? Comment below what it was #retrogaming #micro #computing #memories
0
1
2
Remember when you were born and I had already hypothesized your pointlessness? I was right, of course.
0
1
0
Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha
1
1
0
You probably think you're so smart, typing at 130 words per minute, but I'm running over 130,000 simultaneous tests while writing this.
0
1
0