Andrew Lawrence
@ndrew_lawrence
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Deputy Director of Rapid Response @mmfa but views here are my own - 99% of RTs are endorsements
Joined February 2013
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if your dog stretches and you dont say "OH BIG STRETCH" every single time then you are a psychopath and i dont want to know you
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She's going to end up voting for the guy who said her dad is in hell
Meghan McCain to Joy Behar: "You guys have done a piss-poor job of convincing me that I should vote for a Democrat"
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sure canada has monthly stimulus and universal healthcare but think of all the freedom that its cost them
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Wow, weird how the same people who said they wanted "peaceful protests" are now Very Upset at NBA players for protesting in literally the most peaceful way possible
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all this person did was complain about having a rough day and now the largest cable news network is attacking him
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reporters really shouldnt be afraid to reply “thats the dumbest fucking thing ive ever heard” to a republican who says doors are causing school shootings
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I have watched the first 12 seconds of this at least 100 times, its better than porn
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when i buy a baconator on the dip, short the sandwich at 12:15 and turn a 27% profit
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Hey, if you think a football player kneeling disrespects the troops, do I have a story for you
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Have a friend worried she has coronavirus...she’s trying to do the right thing and get tested. Here’s how that went
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some dude woke up today and decided to commit suicide by cop bc the former host of celebrity apprentice wasnt allowed to keep the top secret documents he stole from the white house
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Historians: Concentration camps are actually what they are
Journos: But it makes the right wing uncomfortable
Historians: Yea, I mean...it should
Journos: But it's a highly charged term
Historians: Right, that's the point
Journos: But it describes atrocities
Historians ...
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Sean Hannity just presented this agenda as a negative
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This dude sheltered nearly 70 protesters overnight to shelter them from our fascist police state. He’s a goddam legend and I hope he never has to pay for another drink in dc again
Rahul saved lives last night. He ended this with an inspirational speech about not giving up and keeping up the peaceful fight. What a guy. Thank you Rahul.
#SwannStreet
#savejenny
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I hope ever member of Congress saw this interview
Melissa Falkowski, teacher at Marjory Stoneman Douglas explains how well prepared they were and how many times they drilled for this and still there was nothing they can do
She breaks down when she begs Congress to do something
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literally everyone warned fox news and tucker carlson that this would happen and they fucking laughed and went harder
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watching scotus destroy rights in a flurry of 6-3 decisions, reminding myself that republicans have lost the popular vote in every potus election except one (1) since 1988
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the truth is, if elon does to this app what he says he will then theres a chance it will destroy him financially and that would be pretty funny
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starting to think it was a mistake to invest in tax cuts for rich people instead of infrastructure for like an entire generation
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facebook is down bc aunt debbie was about to finish her vaccine research and blow this whole thing wide open
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I don’t think we should gas toddlers, sorry for getting all partisan
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starting civil war ii over a states right right to drown children in a river with razor wire
Governors from 15 states have now announced support for Texas in its border dispute with the federal government, with some sending National Guard units.
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if democrats got rid of the filibuster today they would have to get through exactly one (1) fake outrage news cycle from the right and then have two years to make peoples lives better before the next election
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theyre doing their show remotely bc of covid while attacking remote schooling bc of covid
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if he legalizes marijuana he’ll end up w 70 senate seats
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If you’re still wearing a maga hat after Charlottesville, and baby cages, and Muslim ban, and trans military ban, and using “Pocahontas” as an insult...then yea, people are going to assume some things about you
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An actual quote from Don Jr about Hunter Biden: "When you're the father and your sons entire career is dependent on that, they own you"
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when mom hands me a mimosa at 830 am christmas morning
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yelling down from my yacht why including means testing for social welfare programs is a hard line for me
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@UrbanAchievr
Conservative: I have been censored for my conservative views
Me: Holy shit! You were censored for wanting lower taxes?
Con: LOL no...no not those views
Me: So....deregulation?
Con: Haha no not those views either
Me: Which views, exactly?
Con: Oh, you know the ones
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They are literally attacking one of the impeachment witnesses for.......drinking water
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tune in to fox news tonight if you want to watch a bunch of vaccinated people who work at a place w vaccination requirements pretend they're unvaccinated and dont work at a place with vaccine requirements
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You guys were suspending people for changing their screen name to "Elon Musk"
We didn’t suspend Alex Jones or Infowars yesterday. We know that’s hard for many but the reason is simple: he hasn’t violated our rules. We’ll enforce if he does. And we’ll continue to promote a healthy conversational environment by ensuring tweets aren’t artificially amplified.
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the right will defend rittenhouse and 1/6 and pass laws that you can use your car to run over protesters and democrats will condemn their own voters for chanting loudly outside someones house
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Senator: Do you believe it’s illegal to break the law?
ACB: I’m not going to get into hypotheticals
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it should be illegal for hedge funds to buy single family homes and its insane that its not
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what if the reason kids are depressed is bc they realize theyre living in a dying state with no hope for upward mobility and theyre expected to start their adult lives w $100k in debt and no real job prospects, but im no expert maybe it’s actually masks and zoom classes
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“Ice cream isn’t dinner” they say. Ok. Well why not? No one ever tells you because no one really knows. So what’s this really all about? The answer is simple: power.
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billionaire tech bros dont seem to understand people just want to read some anonymous outback line cook posting shit like “she grunk on my grink” interspersed with breaking news
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You gotta watch this, I mean........you just gotta watch
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hold on a sec, are you telling me the entire conservative media apparatus is controlled and propped up by billionaires who see value in targeting vulnerable groups as scapegoats for societys ills to distract from the systemic failures the rich use to enrich themselves?
Here is The Daily Wire explaining how many billionaires have owned Steven Crowder while he's claimed to be independent.
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Please watch the dumbest thing you'll ever see in your life
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Watch what happens when Tucker Carlson steps out of the conservative bubble and brings on an
@AOC
policy adviser who debunks all the conservative media lies straight to his face (spoiler: it doesn't go great for Tucker)
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eating every raw onion i can find, not bc im pro-salmonella, i just dont like being told what to do and its my personal choice
OUTBREAK UPDATE: Fresh whole onions causing large Salmonella outbreak in 37 states. Throw away any unlabeled onions at home. Do not eat, sell, or serve red, white, or yellow onions imported from Mexico and distributed U.S.-wide by ProSource Inc.
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a 14 yr old who just had his xbox taken away for calling mom a bitch: i think twitter should make a honking sound when you log on
elon musk: interesting, looking into this
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"make america florida" is such a funny goddam slogan, do they not know how the state is perceived in the other 49
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For everyone losing their shit over Pence being booed at a play:
Obama was heckled by a member of congress during the State of the Union
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This is infowars shit, just a completely batshit conspiracy theory blasted into your meemaws face
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Republican senator Mike Lee blasts the Trump administrations post-Iran briefing, says they were told they could not dissent from Trump, couldn't debate it, and if Trump needed justification to go to war "I'm sure we could think of something"
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its fun watching the ceo of twitter learn in real time that verification isnt a status symbol and actually has utility
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lol this bar graph makes it look like the number is 1/3 what it used to be but its not
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Extremism on the left: Everyone should have health care
Extremism on the right: An anonymous internet commenter says 40,000 democrats are about to be sent to Gitmo for pedophilia and this is the only truth I accept
Media: These things are the same to me
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Tomi Lahren claims she hates do-nothing losers who earn a paycheck for not contributing and also now she's dating Jay Cutler
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yesterday was “new twitters” first real test in a real-time global crisis and it failed spectacularly
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This is nazi shit
Thousands of immigrants forced into solitary confinement by ICE for being physically disabled or gay.
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when being anti-vaxx is associated with being a "strong conservative" you can place 100% of the blame on conservative media
“I was strongly against getting the vaccine,” Barker said through labored breathing. “Just because we’re a strong conservative family.”
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express your horror at this now before the people who are going to defend it get out of church
Texas "physically barred" Border Patrol agents from trying to rescue migrants who drowned, federal officials say
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im a small government conservative and my top choice for president wants to make trans people illegal and my second choice wants to force you to submit your daughters menstrual history to the state for approval
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for all my non-american followers this means he isnt guilty
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This demented old man is going to end up bringing down a presidency, it's the funniest goddam thing I've ever seen
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A doff of the cap to you good sir, I have noticed you are carrying zip ties and wearing a "Camp Auschwitz" shirt. Mayhaps we can engage in a hearty and thoughtful exchange of ideas on topics of varying political events in order to foster unity?
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Did I have a goddam fever dream or have republicans literally been chanting "LOCK HER UP" for the past 4 years?!?!?!?!?!
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virginia tech requires their students to be vaccinated, i know its weird seeing large groups of people together right now but lets lay off the kids who are doing what we told them to do to get back to normal
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we just kinda blew right past trump running a pill mill outta the white house huh
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ron desantis spent like $200M and all he accomplished was broadcasting to the whole world that he wears high heels inside his boots and eats pudding with his fingers
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im a small government conservative and i am demanding detailed information about your childs menstrual cycle if they want to play high school sports
Florida female student athletes have to report their menstrual history to play: When they got their first period, when they had their last one, etc. A third party has access to that info, and parents and doctors are raising red flags
@katikokal
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Tx Lt Gov Dan Patrick says grandparents would be willing to die to save the economy for their grandchildren
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Fox News just argued in court that the host of their most watched program is completely full of shit and no one should believe him
Fed. judge dismisses Karen McDougal's defamation lawsuit against Fox News and Tucker Carlson for saying she extorted the president.
Fox News successfully argued that Tucker's reputation is so bad reasonable viewers know to be skeptical about his claims.
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id like to see the corporate research that shows businesses lose more money on shoplifting than they do on customers walking out without spending anything when they see the item they came in for is locked up in a cage and they need to find someone to get it for them
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i love living in the freest country in the world where the government is forcing women to keep a dead fetus inside their body for awhile for no real reason
FRANKFORT, Ky. (AP) — Kentucky woman seeking court approval for abortion learned her embryo no longer has cardiac activity, attorneys say.
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I feel like a presidential nominee saying in a court filing he has an unlimited line of credit with saudi arabia warrants some follow up questions
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the reason republicans keep losing elections is bc theyre a bunch of weird freaks pushing terrible policy everyone hates
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a political movement using violence to get its way is the literal definition of terrorism
Target will remove some of its LGBTQ+ merchandise from its Pride Month collection after facing customer backlash that threatened the safety of its workers, the company said.
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i want stories about how voters were turned off by republican blood and soil rhetoric and they were repulsed by stephen millers racist ads about a war on white people. i want stories about how handing the keys to the gop to tucker carlson and charlie kirk is killing the party
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Tucker Carlson really really really really does not like living in a diverse country
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Doing a marijuana by putting it in a spoon and then melting it down
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An absolutely stunning racist attack on
@IlhanMN
from Tucker. I'm shocked
She is "living proof that the way we practice immigration has become dangerous to this country"
She "is a living fire alarm. A warning to the rest of us that we better change our immigration. Or else"
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Fox show completely implodes when Juan Williams notes that conservative media is regurgitating talking points from the White House
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they literally just spent the last 2 years telling us that homeschooling was evil, they told us every day it was ruining childhoods
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the woke mob wants you to think its "illegal" and "a crime" to attempt to overthrow the government and install yourself as dictator for life
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Trust fund baby Tucker Swanson McNear Carlson, son of the fmr US ambassador to the Seychelles, heir to a fortune, man who was gifted the most coveted timeslot in cable news after previously being fired from 2 other networks....says there is no such thing as "privilege"
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when youre on national tv and make fun of joe biden for calling the hubble telescope the web telescope and are doubled over with how funny it is without realizing theres a very famous james webb telescope
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so yea, sorry texas grandparents but the invisible hand demands a sacrifice
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