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maha

@mahaaaay

Followers
15K
Following
249K
Media
6K
Statuses
64K

like baja blast but with an m • 🤠🍒

Joined December 2011
Don't wanna be here? Send us removal request.
@mahaaaay
maha
10 months
“your screen time is down” thank you i have been spending more time looking at medium screen (laptop) and big screen (tv).
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@mahaaaay
maha
7 months
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@DrewSav
Drew Savicki
7 months
Trump is totally misreading the room with these appointments. All people wanted was lower prices.
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@mahaaaay
maha
1 month
“you should join a run club” you mean a sex cult?.
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@mahaaaay
maha
1 year
your unemployed friend
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@mahaaaay
maha
8 months
men love saying let’s fucking go. yes. let’s fucking go to therapy big dog.
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@mahaaaay
maha
11 months
so important to travel with someone that understands the importance of sitting with you in silence while you both look at your phones.
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@mahaaaay
maha
7 months
mike tyson? from the hangover?
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@mahaaaay
maha
10 months
due to inflation you may now make two (2) “i’m going to kill myself” jokes per day.
@mahaaaay
maha
1 year
you’re allowed to make one (1) “i’m going to kill myself” joke per day.
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@mahaaaay
maha
10 months
kamala did something i have never been able to do. she chose the right white guy.
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@mahaaaay
maha
1 year
the woman was too stunned to speak
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@mahaaaay
maha
4 months
saying “allen iverson?” really loudly when people mention AI.
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@mahaaaay
maha
1 year
not him hitting on me from his dog’s instagram account
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@mahaaaay
maha
8 months
“THE ohio state university” shut THE fuck up.
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@mahaaaay
maha
28 days
white guys be like my name is matt.
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@mahaaaay
maha
1 month
a pope that has been to wawa.
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@mahaaaay
maha
1 year
white people love saying “oh those are dangerous” to a bag of chips. lol just eat the doritos man.
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@mahaaaay
maha
2 months
“politics shouldn’t determine friendships” yes they should.
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@mahaaaay
maha
1 year
the sluttiest thing a man can do is be open and honest with his feelings.
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@mahaaaay
maha
5 months
white guys love saying “lotta game left”.
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@mahaaaay
maha
3 months
no babe i love your favourite baseball team. the good ones scare me.
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@mahaaaay
maha
1 year
“he is risen! glory be to god” being posted to their instagram stories by the meanest girls you’ve ever met.
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@mahaaaay
maha
1 year
me and whomst
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@mahaaaay
maha
8 months
the american mind cannot comprehend this 🍫 🇨🇦
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@mahaaaay
maha
1 year
the worst person you know is happy about this celtics championship.
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@mahaaaay
maha
10 months
in what world do you pick pam beesley over karen filippelli.
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@mahaaaay
maha
3 months
before you turn 30 you should survive a global pandemic, get through a devestating breakup and a trade war with your closest political ally.
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@mahaaaay
maha
4 months
holy shit @googlemaps
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@mahaaaay
maha
3 months
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@mahaaaay
maha
1 year
“what are your intentions with my mother?”
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@mahaaaay
maha
1 year
i miss when AI meant allen iverson what the fuck is artificial intelligence.
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@mahaaaay
maha
4 years
in canada the only way to get the vaccine is if you win it as a roll up the rim prize.
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@mahaaaay
maha
2 months
the first thing he mentions being children with autism “will never pay taxes” tells you everything you need to know about what he truly cares about. …and is also factually incorrect.
@Acyn
Acyn
2 months
RFK JR: And these are kids who will never pay taxes, they'll never hold a job, they'll never play baseball, they'll never write a poem. They'll never go out on a date. Many of them will never use a toilet unassisted
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@mahaaaay
maha
2 months
can we stop framing autism as this sort of boogeyman? it just perpetuates its stigma. folks on the spectrum can live long and fulfilling lives.
@CP24
CP24
2 months
RFK Jr. says U.S. will know cause of autism epidemic by September
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@mahaaaay
maha
4 months
if this flag offends you, i’ll help you pack
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@mahaaaay
maha
4 months
human beings saw this and still made salesforce
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@mahaaaay
maha
1 year
my daughter is going to be so pissed when i name her amon-ra st. brown.
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@mahaaaay
maha
4 months
donald trump’s tariffs are creating a sense of nationalism only found in this country during the winter olympics.
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@mahaaaay
maha
1 year
boys love telling u when a song is on fifa.
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@mahaaaay
maha
7 months
my thoughts on jason kelce smashing that dude’s phone for calling his brother a homophobic slur: very funny. 10/10 no notes.
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@mahaaaay
maha
1 year
if i placed 231 bets and only won 10 i would kill myself.
@BleacherReport
Bleacher Report
1 year
MLB has banned Tucupita Marcano permanently for betting on games involving his own team. He won just 4.3% of the 231 MLB-related bets he placed
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@mahaaaay
maha
1 year
therapy is expensive. saying hell yeah brother is free.
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@mahaaaay
maha
1 year
[day one of pregnancy] the baby is craving a draftkings account.
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@mahaaaay
maha
1 year
my buddy made $3.48 on a bet tonight
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@mahaaaay
maha
4 months
i —
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@mahaaaay
maha
2 months
being a liberal is actually gross you should just be a socialist.
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@mahaaaay
maha
1 year
texts from my financial advisor
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@mahaaaay
maha
1 year
they’re changing diapers and i’m watching caitlin clark change the trajectory of women’s sports.
@penkostephens
🙎🏾
1 year
people your age are getting married having children and you’re watching sports.
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@mahaaaay
maha
1 year
god forbid men have hobbies.
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@mahaaaay
maha
1 year
you forgot to mention you’re a dweeb.
@rarecray
Dan
1 year
reasons why i’m single
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@mahaaaay
maha
1 year
losing friends left and right to the pickleball epidemic.
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@mahaaaay
maha
1 year
going to have a caesar salad girl summer. where i travel to destinations across the globe trying different caesar salads.
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@mahaaaay
maha
4 months
i think canadians should boo the us anthem even louder.
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@mahaaaay
maha
1 year
i’m sorry but if you’re rooting for the oilers to lose tonight i hate your guts
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@mahaaaay
maha
4 months
do you know how much you have to piss off canadians for us to unilaterally hate people more than we hate the french.
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@mahaaaay
maha
10 months
@stewmsabourin imagine failing art school.
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@mahaaaay
maha
4 months
this would eat with the facebook moms.
@yungchomsky
actually it’s good
4 months
sorry, not interested in "the white lotus". busy dealing with "the orange POTUS".
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@mahaaaay
maha
5 months
can’t even tell a guy you’re sad because he’ll just tell you to “lock in”.
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@mahaaaay
maha
8 months
@Tyre_94 shut your whore mouth.
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@mahaaaay
maha
4 months
the 4 nations face-off
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@mahaaaay
maha
4 months
i’m sorry but this is insane.
@WhiteHouse
The White House
4 months
Happy Valentine's Day ♥️
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@mahaaaay
maha
1 year
“play” like i used to let my little sister “play” nintendo64 with me with her controller unplugged.
@AdamSchefter
Adam Schefter
1 year
Kenny Pickett grew up in New Jersey as an Eagles fan. Now he gets to go play for the team he rooted for.
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@mahaaaay
maha
7 months
hey do you want to come over and watch 7 hours of commercial free football with me in complete silence.
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@mahaaaay
maha
7 months
how do i legally change my name.
@RobertKennedyJc
ⁿᵉʷˢ Robert F. Kennedy Jr.
7 months
Good morning, beautiful people!. Let's MAHA!. #TeamUnity.
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@mahaaaay
maha
1 year
me liking all of the anthony edwards praise
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@mahaaaay
maha
2 months
going to just start saying “art of the deal” whenever i’m being a dumb bitch.
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@mahaaaay
maha
1 year
the plan? spend $43 billion to buy an app and allow it to be infiltrated by sex bots.
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@mahaaaay
maha
4 years
omg this clip of nick foligno with his kids is the cutest thing i’ve ever seen
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@mahaaaay
maha
1 year
maybe i’ll just be single forever
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@mahaaaay
maha
10 months
@SGAstarboy more of a creed gal myself.
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@mahaaaay
maha
10 months
@ogbeardface hotter? get a grip.
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@mahaaaay
maha
1 year
spiraling all by yourself, beautiful?.
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@mahaaaay
maha
2 months
can i say something.
@baseballisdead_
Baseball Is Dead
2 months
Jeff Passan. ANIMAL.
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@mahaaaay
maha
8 months
jesse winker forever
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@mahaaaay
maha
2 years
anthony bass
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@mahaaaay
maha
2 years
white guys love going to town on a bag of chips and then saying “get these things away from me”.
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@mahaaaay
maha
1 year
i just burst into tears
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@mahaaaay
maha
3 months
this would work on me
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@mahaaaay
maha
2 years
me watching game 7 hockey:
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@mahaaaay
maha
2 months
when he’s showing me his fantasy baseball team and i have to pretend like i know who hayden birdsong is
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@mahaaaay
maha
8 months
for a women! Lol
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@mahaaaay
maha
2 years
remember when jason spezza bought 30 tickets for his friends & family to see his debut with his hometown team and mike babcock healthy scratched him?.
@RiehlAlex99
Alex Riehl
2 years
@miketgould Unfortunately, I somehow trust Babcock more than Barstool.
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@mahaaaay
maha
2 years
HER SISTER WAS A WITCH
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@mahaaaay
maha
10 months
does anybody know how to have a crush without being utterly fucking insane.
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@mahaaaay
maha
8 months
very funny to me that the nhl continually struggles with viewership and decides to schedule sixteen (16) hockey games the same night the nba is back. you have no choice but to laugh.
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@mahaaaay
maha
2 years
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@reporterchris
Chris Johnston
2 years
The #leafs have placed John Klingberg on LTIR.
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@mahaaaay
maha
1 year
me watching him make a 27 leg parlay
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@mahaaaay
maha
2 years
hi sorry can’t hang out tonight i’m watching sports alone in the dark.
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@mahaaaay
maha
7 months
i genuinely do not understand the "we can disagree on politics and still be friends" crowd. why would i want to be friends with someone with contradictory fundamental beliefs on issues like human rights, equality, social justice than me?.
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@mahaaaay
maha
1 year
my little brother blocked me on twitter. he’s so real for this
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@mahaaaay
maha
11 months
who said romance is dead
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@mahaaaay
maha
1 year
“oh no yeah” and “oh yeah no” mean opposite things.
@GrammarTable
Ellen is at the Grammar Table
1 year
Canadian friends, what is something you can tell us about Canadian English that people often don't know?.
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@mahaaaay
maha
4 months
vaxxed?.
@BR_OpenIce
B/R Open Ice
4 months
Tony DeAngelo, right into his own net 🫣
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@mahaaaay
maha
23 days
cigarettes aren’t bad for you if you are pure of heart.
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@mahaaaay
maha
2 years
i —
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@mahaaaay
maha
3 months
why would she marry someone that doesn’t share the same core values as her can we all just get a grip please.
@FearedBuck
FearBuck
3 months
Sara rejects Ben at the Love Is Blind altar because of his views on BLM, LGBTQ and the vaccine.
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@mahaaaay
maha
4 months
fiscally conservati— shut the fuck up.
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@mahaaaay
maha
4 months
lots of you that have followed me for my silly little sports tweets are going to be pissed when you find out that i am a raging socialist.
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@mahaaaay
maha
3 years
millions of people are watching women’s hockey at 11pm on a wednesday night but yes “women’s sports are boring” eh.
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@mahaaaay
maha
2 years
asking men wearing yankees hats at the bar to name 5 players.
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@mahaaaay
maha
10 months
woke up to an empty brita in my fridge. i live alone
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