Marls
@m_was
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Joined March 2012
Apparently the bartender really doesn't like it when you walk behind the bar and try to make your own drink. #LifeLessons
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#ThatAwkwardMoment when you have 10 tabs open and can't figure out where the music is coming from.
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No matter how old I get, I will always find "that's what she said" jokes hilarious. #truth
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It all comes down to the last person you think of at night. That is where your heart is.
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A beautiful woman is a beautiful woman...but a beautiful woman with a brain is a lethal combo.
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Everytime I walk over a sewer grate I look down into it hoping to catch a glimpse of a Ninja Turtle.
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If "dress for the job you want" were true, there would be a lot more people wearing capes.
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I pretty much spend all day, every day, just looking forward to going back to sleep.
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What's the point of a high school reunion? Facebook already ruined the surprise of me finding out that you got fat.
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As a kid there was nothing better than making the honking signal to a truck driver and him honking back.
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I wish I could trade my heart for another liver, so I could drink more and care less.
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Sometimes, I feel like my life should be documented for future generations.
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#ThatMoment when you're sitting in your cubicle thinking, "man, I could make a pretty bad ass fort out of this thing..."
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