Kalie Shorr Profile Banner
Kalie Shorr Profile
Kalie Shorr

@kalieshorr

Followers
16,509
Following
999
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1,882
Statuses
35,626

chronic ex girlfriend 🫶🏻 she/her contact: info.kalieshorr @gmail .com

Los Angeles, CA
Joined November 2009
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@kalieshorr
Kalie Shorr
2 years
listening to other people’s opinions on my career has gotten me absolutely nowhere so I will officially be returning to doing whatever the actual fuck I want
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@kalieshorr
Kalie Shorr
2 years
Taylor Swift.
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@kalieshorr
Kalie Shorr
2 years
I’m so proud of Taylor Swift. Not for any particular reason, just her existence in general
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@kalieshorr
Kalie Shorr
2 years
@mattxiv @yashar Back in middle school when the phonebook was a thing, my friends dad had to make their number unlisted because he had the same name as the local weatherman and people got REAL mad when he got it wrong and would call leaving threatening voicemails. So maybe he’s used to it 😂
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@kalieshorr
Kalie Shorr
1 year
@ask_aubry why is no one talking about the “seconds of contact”?! 💀💀💀
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@kalieshorr
Kalie Shorr
7 years
Taylor Swift got me dissecting metaphors and imagery like I haven't done since my book report on To Kill A Mockingbird in 9th grade
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@kalieshorr
Kalie Shorr
1 month
me if bullying Morgan Wallen was illegal
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@kalieshorr
Kalie Shorr
4 years
Do y’all remember that brief period of time when everyone called Taylor Swift T-swizzle? Those were simpler times
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@kalieshorr
Kalie Shorr
4 years
I’m jealous of whatever is stuck in Nick Jonas’s teeth
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@kalieshorr
Kalie Shorr
3 years
Speaking for the songwriting community, all of this discourse is so sad and makes us feel misunderstood. The point of art is that it captures fleeting moments in everlasting form. How many times did Da Vinci meet Mona Lisa?
@JessicaHuseman
Jessica Huseman
3 years
Is it normal or healthy to have an album be about a brief relationship from several years ago
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@kalieshorr
Kalie Shorr
1 year
@emmacrochets these are the same girls who say “I don’t thrift cause it takes away from people who need it” like girlies the charity shops are to RAISE MONEY FOR CHARITY & there’s literally never going to be a shortage of clothes on this planet! Thrift stores send BACK to landfills bc of this
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@kalieshorr
Kalie Shorr
4 years
Miss Americana has me ready to throw hands at anyone who is ever mean to Taylor Swift ever again. I don’t care that I don’t know how to fight. They’re cyber bullies, they probably don’t either
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@kalieshorr
Kalie Shorr
6 years
Honestly the spookiest part of spooky szn is you don’t know if you really like a guy or if he’s just wearing a really nice sweater
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@kalieshorr
Kalie Shorr
5 years
Today I lost my sister to a really long battle with addiction. It really is a disease and it is so difficult to overcome. She just couldn’t beat it. Please hug your loved ones and be patient with people who are fighting their demons. Anger never helps but love does.
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@kalieshorr
Kalie Shorr
2 years
I swear that any time I have ever tweeted about Taylor Swift, it has gone viral. This is now officially an experiment.
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@kalieshorr
Kalie Shorr
3 years
I was once drunk and immature enough to jump 30 feet off a pier into the ocean, but I’ve never been drunk enough to say a racial slur. Because alcohol and immaturity doesn’t make you do that. Racism does. Fuck this shit
@TMZ
TMZ
3 years
Morgan Wallen Hurls N-Word Outside Home After Rowdy Night Out
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@kalieshorr
Kalie Shorr
1 year
@laracroftbarbie But why is the peach syrup in a peach ring water a plot twist 😭
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@kalieshorr
Kalie Shorr
3 years
me after watching Cardi and Megan Thee Stallion sing WAP at the Grammys:
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@kalieshorr
Kalie Shorr
5 years
@halsey @taylorswift13 sis didn’t just drop a mic she dropped the whole damn sound system
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@kalieshorr
Kalie Shorr
5 years
let’s play a game- is that girl on his Instagram his: A) girlfriend B) cousin C) a friend who poses weirdly close?
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@kalieshorr
Kalie Shorr
1 year
@nonbin_eri it would simply ~yeet out of me~
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@kalieshorr
Kalie Shorr
4 years
I just met @amandashires and @jasonisbell ’s 4 year old daughter. She was handing out candy to everyone backstage. Our exchange is as follows: Me: this is a really good way to make friends Her: it’s a really good way to get attention
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@kalieshorr
Kalie Shorr
2 years
I SAID THATS MY BABY AND IM PROUD!!!!!! @MickeyGuyton
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@kalieshorr
Kalie Shorr
8 years
I watched the CMAs in sweatpants last year. This year was better. @taylorswift13
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@kalieshorr
Kalie Shorr
4 years
getting “2020, man” tattooed right above “Carrie Underwood should not have to share a damn thing with anyone ever” on my lower back
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@kalieshorr
Kalie Shorr
6 years
Taylor Swift hasn’t been this robbed of a VMA since Kanye LITERALLY took it out of her hands. thank you for coming to my ted talk
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@kalieshorr
Kalie Shorr
7 years
I've never been in the fight but just know if one day I am, it's because someone used the snake emoji to describe Taylor Swift.
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@kalieshorr
Kalie Shorr
8 months
I was Taylor Swift’s stand-in for a music video and didn’t know it was her’s til I got there. I walked around the corner and she goes “you must be Kalie! You have such beautiful eyes!” like girly must’ve looked at the cast list before???? I had to go to the bathroom and cry
@gothamhiphop
Joey
8 months
What’s your favorite interaction you’ve had with a celebrity?
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@kalieshorr
Kalie Shorr
4 years
Despite being quarantined (except for a handful of trips for groceries) for three weeks, I managed to contract COVID 19. I'm feeling significantly better, but it's proof how dangerous and contagious this is. It's endlessly frustrating to see people not taking this seriously.
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@kalieshorr
Kalie Shorr
4 years
“why did you sign to an NYC label if you’re a cOuNtRy ArTiSt” well prob cause I’ve talked with every major label in Nashville minimum of 3x and they’ve all told me I “wasn’t ready” so I found someone who thought I was 🤷🏼 idk might drop a song about it
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@kalieshorr
Kalie Shorr
3 years
TAYLOR SWIFT. THATS IT. THATS THE TWEET. THATS THE SHOW. goodnight
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@kalieshorr
Kalie Shorr
5 years
me: so basically daylight saving time is just a ploy by big pharma to give everyone seasonal depression and I mean honestly isn’t time just a human construct anyway guy at bar: I think I see my friends
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@kalieshorr
Kalie Shorr
3 years
we 🥺 are getting 🥺🥺🥺 unreleased Fearless era songs 🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺 someone hold me
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@kalieshorr
Kalie Shorr
6 years
On a scale of 1 to Katy Perry sending Taylor Swift an *actual* olive branch how extra are you? (I’m just mad I didn’t think of this first @ girls who called me period head in high school)
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@kalieshorr
Kalie Shorr
6 years
Biggest shocker of 2017: the @Harry_Styles album is the most badass and unapologetic rock & roll record of the year
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@kalieshorr
Kalie Shorr
1 year
@joss_prior this woman understands high camp. That’s how you spot a true ally 😂
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@kalieshorr
Kalie Shorr
6 years
are you Fearless sad or are you Fearless Platinum Edition sad because there is a BIG difference let me tell ya
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@kalieshorr
Kalie Shorr
5 years
I’m bawling my eyes out. A girl from Nashville with a guitar and story can do anything- no matter what country radio says. Congratulations @KaceyMusgraves 💜
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@kalieshorr
Kalie Shorr
5 years
What is more flawless: Alicia Keys skin or Dan + Shay’s pitch
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@kalieshorr
Kalie Shorr
1 year
@lingerie_addict This will sound silly but Marie Kondo helped me with my ED recovery when I got rid of all my “skinny clothes” that I wanted to fit back into. Every time I looked at them I felt like shit. They brought zero joy. Now all my clothes fit and I feel so much better w/o those reminders
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@kalieshorr
Kalie Shorr
5 years
Instagram is down, I just had my second flat tire in 24 hours, my ex boyfriend keeps texting me, and we are only halfway through Mercury being in retrograde. Jesus take the wheel
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@kalieshorr
Kalie Shorr
1 year
@Maladroithe Okay but I will say she is still much hotter than he deserves 👀
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@kalieshorr
Kalie Shorr
3 years
yes. I compared All Too Well to the Mona Lisa. And I will STAND BY IT
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@kalieshorr
Kalie Shorr
5 years
Last night a girl complimented me on my jacket and a guy was trying to hit on her so he said he’d Venmo me $100 for it and I’ve never ripped off a $15 jacket faster in my life lmao god provides ✨
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@kalieshorr
Kalie Shorr
4 years
I am so bored of talking about this shit. How are we ever supposed to get our songs on the radio when mathematically there are fewer slots per hour? Why are y’all so afraid of vaginas? You came out of one
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@kalieshorr
Kalie Shorr
6 years
MOM I’M MAKING MY OPRY DEBUT! So in love with life. So in love with country music. Can’t wait to stand in the circle for the first time on 3/31! @opry (ps I cried typing this too okay bye)
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@kalieshorr
Kalie Shorr
5 years
My optometrist yesterday started talking to me about Taylor Swift and went on a full ass rant about how she doesn’t deserve $14 million a show like *insert list of 4 male artists* do and y’all I was PISSED. I would’ve thrown hands if he didn’t have machinery aimed at my eye
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@kalieshorr
Kalie Shorr
4 years
Remember, if you're losing followers and friends over this, it says much more about them than you. It's happening to me as we speak. This is a hill worth dying on.
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@kalieshorr
Kalie Shorr
4 years
definitely didn’t realize we were live... @carrieunderwood stan for life ✌🏻
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@kalieshorr
Kalie Shorr
4 years
every girl has an ex-boyfriend who was never her boyfriend. sorry I don’t make the rules
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@kalieshorr
Kalie Shorr
5 years
No man is 5’11”. If you were, you’d round up to 6 feet. You are 5’9” and a half.
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@kalieshorr
Kalie Shorr
6 years
I said earlier “if Kacey Musgraves doesn’t win album of the year I quit” so I’m proud to announce I’ll be staying in music LOL
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@kalieshorr
Kalie Shorr
7 years
Taylor Swift's new single is actually about me, right now, sitting here refreshing iTunes because I'm ABOUT TO EXPLODE
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@kalieshorr
Kalie Shorr
2 years
@nowthisnews If everyone actively chose to be there, I think it’s hilarious and they probably hadn’t done something like that in decades. This feels like another layer of infantilization of the elderly 🙄
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@kalieshorr
Kalie Shorr
4 years
ARE WE FINALLY GETTING AN INDIE SINGER/SONGWRITER ALBUM FROM TAYLOR OH MY GOD
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@kalieshorr
Kalie Shorr
4 years
I know some of you think you’re above the panic/quarantining/social distancing and that’s great, love that for you, but if this doesn’t get contained, myself and a shit ton of other people will continue to be out of a job. I don’t know why that isn’t adding up for y’all.
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@kalieshorr
Kalie Shorr
8 months
I’m so supportive of Taylor being in her athlete era because obviously she’s smarter than any man she’s ever dated but a least an athlete will know that
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@kalieshorr
Kalie Shorr
3 years
dudes on here are like “ugh Taylor you dated for three months, get over it” like they arent still sending fire emojis on Instagram to a girl they cheated on freshman year of high school 🙄
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@kalieshorr
Kalie Shorr
6 years
@seaisabell @rachyymarshall Omg all I remember was how cute she was 😍 PSA: anyone can do this to me anywhere at all times ever lolllll
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@kalieshorr
Kalie Shorr
4 years
just got hit on by a stranger... he said “if corona virus doesn’t take you out, can I?” I’m scREAMING
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@kalieshorr
Kalie Shorr
7 years
Seems we have a SWIFTuation happening here on the interwebs so if you need me I'll be deciphering clues for the next 48 hours bye
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@kalieshorr
Kalie Shorr
4 years
I was today years old when I found out Avril Lavigne wrote Breakaway by Kelly Clarkson
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@kalieshorr
Kalie Shorr
3 years
10 hours until I get angry texts from two of my exes and also 10 hours until my album comes out!!!
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@kalieshorr
Kalie Shorr
1 year
@bananafitz I like going to other peoples houses because I can leave whenever I want
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@kalieshorr
Kalie Shorr
2 years
Taylor Swift’s saddest song is The 1, don’t @ me
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@kalieshorr
Kalie Shorr
6 years
Okay I do understand the necessity of hunting but WHY would you put any sort of dead ANYTHING in your dating profile? Like damn, girls are just trying to see if you’re chill or not and BAM a cute lil deer with a mortal head wound... 😭 I can’t even
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@kalieshorr
Kalie Shorr
5 years
rt if you really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really wanna zigazig ah
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@kalieshorr
Kalie Shorr
1 year
@Alex_Cameron They used screenshots and the *entire* video (not through an Instagram widget so I didn’t get the views) I shot myself of a song dedicated to my sister after she passed. So shitty. Any idea what I should charge them if I pursue it?
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@kalieshorr
Kalie Shorr
5 years
boys and tequila: two things I don’t chase
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@kalieshorr
Kalie Shorr
4 years
wow I miss when hand sanitizer was pink and smelled like watermelon and also when I had a job
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@kalieshorr
Kalie Shorr
5 years
After much internal debate over the past few weeks in an attempt to look past the haze that is nostalgia, my twelve personalities and I have come to the conclusion that Lover is Taylor Swift’s best album to date. We will be taking no further questions at this time.
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@kalieshorr
Kalie Shorr
6 years
I’m getting major first record Taylor Swift vibes from September and I’m emotioNAL DONT TOUCH ME
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@kalieshorr
Kalie Shorr
5 years
10 days until I start recording my debut album. I’m losing my mind.
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@kalieshorr
Kalie Shorr
4 years
Several media outlets called me an "artist to watch in 2020", but they didn't specify what they were watching *for*. Could be success, could be new music, could be a mental breakdown. Context is important
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@kalieshorr
Kalie Shorr
3 years
I once wore glasses to a bar and had a 50 year old man offer to be my sugar daddy because he refused to believe I wasn't @KatTimpf . I went with it and said "Fox pays me more than you could"... but I did take a picture with him and his friends to be nice.
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@kalieshorr
Kalie Shorr
5 years
Can you imagine being one of those people who comment on everything an artist does saying “that’s not country”? Where do you get all your free time? Can I borrow some? Do you have hobbies? Is that your hobby? Please explain
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@kalieshorr
Kalie Shorr
4 years
The Chicks and Eric Church make me proud to be part of country music. Make the good real loud. And make the bad leave town with their tail between their legs.
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@kalieshorr
Kalie Shorr
6 years
Friendly reminder that if he’s not texting you back he ain’t shit and one day you’ll find someone whose heart lights up when they see your name on their phone. Remember that. Wait for that.
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@kalieshorr
Kalie Shorr
2 years
Update: 12 hours since I first listened to the new @ddlovato album. This is my personality now, and I plan on making it everyone’s problem.
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@kalieshorr
Kalie Shorr
5 years
It’s okay if you don’t have a boyfriend on Valentine’s Day because that means you also don’t have a boyfriend on Super Bowl Sunday and then you don’t have to watch it
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@kalieshorr
Kalie Shorr
5 years
I just took a DNA test turns out I’m 100% going to say it’s fine when it’s absolutely not fine
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@kalieshorr
Kalie Shorr
4 years
the Dixie Chicks putting out a new song is the only thing that could turn my day around. Nashville deserves this damn it
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@kalieshorr
Kalie Shorr
4 years
I’m so single that the only person I drunk text is twitter
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@kalieshorr
Kalie Shorr
4 years
I wonder if the people who are pissed about modern black music (rap, trap beats, etc) influencing country music trends know that the banjo came from Africa
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@kalieshorr
Kalie Shorr
5 years
So you’re telling me @ShaniaTwain , @leannrimes AND @CassadeePope were all born today and it hasn’t been declared a national holiday yet? Unbelievable
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@kalieshorr
Kalie Shorr
4 years
I swear to God, whenever someone comes after me for swearing on the Internet, I’ll go to their profile and there’s ALWAYS something racist/homophobic/sexist on it. You know what’s worse than saying asshole? Being one
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@kalieshorr
Kalie Shorr
10 years
So impressed by everything @nickjonas is putting out right now. True artistry, at it's finest.
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@kalieshorr
Kalie Shorr
4 years
fuck yeah sis
@taylorswift13
Taylor Swift
4 years
As a Tennessean, it makes me sick that there are monuments standing in our state that celebrate racist historical figures who did evil things. Edward Carmack and Nathan Bedford Forrest were DESPICABLE figures in our state history and should be treated as such.
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@kalieshorr
Kalie Shorr
4 years
You see “Tik Tok” and think the app, I see it and think of Kesha Rose Sebert’s 2009 chart topping smash. We are not the same
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@kalieshorr
Kalie Shorr
3 years
Q: who gets a standing ovation on their first song opening for @JasonIsbell at the Ryman? A: @MickeyGuyton Q: who gets THREE MORE after? A: Mickey freaking Guyton!!!!!
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@kalieshorr
Kalie Shorr
1 year
@wavyemma Glossier You. It’s their only fragrance & it’s so light and airy but with a scent that lasts. Smells a little different on everyone. Similar vibe to Bubble Bath by Margiela but with woodsy undertones (as well as pink pepper and amber)
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@kalieshorr
Kalie Shorr
5 years
I hate when I send a tipsy “hi what are u doing :))))” text to a boy and they don’t respond until the next day like “omg sorry I was sleeping what did you need” like bitch nothing I was a different person yesterday I have sobered up and GROWN
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@kalieshorr
Kalie Shorr
6 years
Can’t wait til the day when no one asks me what it’s like to be a female musician and instead, they just ask what it’s like to be a musician
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@kalieshorr
Kalie Shorr
6 years
The devil works hard but @KeithUrban works harder (to support women in country when 80% of the other male acts are too scared to/don’t care)
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@kalieshorr
Kalie Shorr
4 years
I miss CMA Fest and hugging people
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@kalieshorr
Kalie Shorr
8 months
New era loading… October 13th.
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@kalieshorr
Kalie Shorr
8 months
Hey nashville, have you noticed how many women have left country music? Even some of the most successful ones? Is that enough for you to change?
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@kalieshorr
Kalie Shorr
6 years
Had a guy tell me today that he doesn’t want to hear women complain about unfair treatment because we get free drinks and men don’t. I’m so tired of that argument. I’d rather walk into a boardroom and get what I want than a bar.
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@kalieshorr
Kalie Shorr
6 years
Okay I’m sorry but making a new girl best friend is so much better than a new boyfriend because you can skip right to the sweatpants/pizza/Netflix stage of the relationship and double text them as much as you want
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@kalieshorr
Kalie Shorr
5 years
nobody: me, wine drunk, standing on a table: we as a SOCIETY need to collectively start acknowledging that Carly Rae Jepsen has never stopped serving bops since the ground breaking anthem Call Me Maybe (2011). She deserves our respect because she is an ICON and we have failed her
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