tHE.lAST🔝
@jusLikeMike911
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No seriously don't DM me ♍ laugh in my likes 👇🏾
Florida, USA
Joined October 2009
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Pinned Tweet
6 y/o nephew: "Uncle Mike why you don't have a wife?"
Me: "I'm gay."
Nephew: "What that mean?"
Me: "I like men not women."
Nephew: *silence*......."So why don't you have a husband?"
Me:
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Every black person in America:
Several pro-Trump rioters have been identified as off-duty cops from across the country.
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Me: *gets hit by a car*
Me: *opens twitter* "Y'all....."
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You mean fractured my wrist?
What would you do if Jay-z snatched your phone from your hand?
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GYMFAOMMFRRTFN!!!
As long as they not bothering me I guess. 😭
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Watching "Us" with a bunch of black people was such an experience. Lupita yelled at her husband "You're not making the decisions anymore!" And some black girl screamed "PERIOD!" And the whole theater busted out laughing 😂
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Couple in public: "Excuse me, can you take this picture of us?"
Me, a supporter of love:
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Prancer and Vixen after calling Rudolph a f*ggot
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Mercury Retrograde leaving after dismantling your routines, making you question your relationships, flaring your anxiety, and emotionally draining you for 27 days
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Me watching people get dragged on the TL all day for tweeting shit I 100% agree with
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Why is it that every time a black person is found hanging its ruled a suicide 😒
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Tyra said bitch you'll never get an applause on MY show 😂
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Nobody will ever be THIS famous again and I think that's probably a good thing
This isn’t a concert. It’s just MJ at a hotel.. this isn’t even a question
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You be like "fuck that spaghetti"
It’s crazy how your taste buds change after that direct deposit hit
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"One nation, under God, with liberty and justice for all."
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Is Twitter "fixed" or did our limit just start over cause it's a new day
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Ma'am we don't care about that table let's talk about that Whitney Houston mural on the wall 😍
Here’s my new custom made dining room table. 😍...have I reached a new level of adulting with this one?
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Well write me a check then, Oprah.
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Cause see that shit you pulled in the coral reef I should've fucked you up!
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"Your Dasher is completing another order nearby and will deliver your order soon"
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Even a blind man could see y'all wasn't making sense
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They look like Burlington Coat Factory sales associates
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"Violence is never the answer"
*checks history books*
SINCE WHEN?
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My mayne is my mayne is your mayne Her this her mayne too
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That 2k you worked hard for is better than 100k that's given to you for free.
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Yall smoking that Janet Jackson
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The instructions on the box: "1 sheet per load"
Black people:
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There's a reason why Michelle was in the middle
19 years ago today, on November 16, 2004, Destiny's Child released their final studio album, "Destiny Fulfilled."
What is your favorite song ?
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I saw They Cloned Tyrone
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Somebody said this how Gabrielle Union be in all her movies 💀😂
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Kandi ain't fooling not a damn soul lmao
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"Please listen carefully as our menu options have changed"
Me:
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Me when my momma mentioned my name while she's on the phone
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There's a saying in Hollywood "TV makes you rich, movies make you famous"
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Lee Daniels really tried to convince us Mariah Carey would've been a field slave
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I get why Tasha Mack was acting a fool
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Whenever Michael Myers see Jamie Lee Curtis
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Sheree crying despite having zero involvement in the situation will always be hilarious to me lol
Me when I double text and don’t get a response in 30 seconds
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TSR only posted this to incite homophobia
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Whitney Houston when she found her mans credit card receipt
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I prefer the term "antagonist"
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"Refreshments will be served"
Tell me you grew up in a Black church without telling me you grew up in a Black church.
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Would I be out of line if I said she look 61 in both pics
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Spent $66 dollars on them clothes from Shein I took them to Plato's Closet and they gave me $72
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Willy Wonka every time one of them kids died in his chocolate factory
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He still was singing gay if that makes sense lol
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15 years ago I would have never believed Tina Turner, Aretha Franklin, Whitney Houston, Michael Jackson, Prince, and Luther Vandross would all be dead by now WTF
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🎶 "Darkchild 99...."
Friends: "Don't. You better not!"
Me:
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I don't think she understands it's not about the money Cardi doesn't need or want her money she wants her to SUFFER for running her goddamn mouth
Tasha K pleads with Cardi for "fair payment arrangement" as she apologizes again
🎥:
@ComedyHype_
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Queen Latifah
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Goons of a feather
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She needs to be arrested for assault with a deadly weapon and Dollar General needs to fire her for causing them liability because now he can sue them
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We'll never have another moment in television as good as this
I’m still shaking years later chile. Olivia did that! the damn megabus😩
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Nobody:
Straight men who want to participate in having good hygiene:
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This had to be Tyler best movie cause you know Kathy Bates wasn't signing up for no foolishness
Kathy Bates And Alfre Woodard Friendship In This Movie Really Was EVERYTHING 🙌🏾
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Jennifer is so awkward in interviews you can tell she be pretending to be interested lol
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Flav is not ugly because he's dark skin he's ugly because he's ugly
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Y'all sucking dick with condoms? breath gon be smelling like AutoZone
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Joseline is fuming
'Love & Hip Hop Miami' Breakout Star Amara La Negra Lands Multi-Album Record Deal
@AmaraLaNegraALN
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Faith Evans singing "Be Free" by J Cole will never not give me chills
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R&b suffering cause Missy Elliot not executive producing the albums
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When you're hot boxing and the song playing has police sirens in the background
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Rudolph telling Santa Claus how the other reindeer wouldn't let him play any reindeer games
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Very on brand for 2020
There’s going to be a full moon on Halloween this year! First time since 1944!
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"You would KILL me my love?"
"For Wakanda? Without question."
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Everybody at home on Instagram live when the zombie apocalypse start
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You ordered your food wrong
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Monica: "There was a time when I kicking in doors and smacking chics"
Brandy: "you shole was"
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Yes that was actually a thing before cars and cell phones came with GPS navigation
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Yall I started coughing at work and I just got this email so now I'm going home LMAO
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Tyler Perry:
For the first time since 1960, both actors and writers have officially gone on strike — shutting down film and television projects in Hollywood and around the world.
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