My bank statement is literally a food diary

the australian broadcast got the uncensored version of it and... #Oscars

A chiropractor would solve 75% of my problems.

I could go for some mango sour altoids right now.

Casual texts from my uncle..

I ate too much buffalo chicken dip and threw up twice. What a way to say goodbye to 2020! :)))))

True or false- Taylor Swift is the Elvis Presley of our generation?

If billionaires aren’t paying their taxes I don’t see why I should have to pay my student loans.

How do you even choose who ‘won’ that debate....???

I wonder what other people from other countries think about this debate lmao

the sexual tension between me & irish goodbye-ing at every social event i've ever attended

The tequila smelling hand sanitizer might be the worst thing to ever come out of 2020

Animal Crossing is the best and worst thing that’s ever happened to me since Zac

I had buffalo chicken dip and ice cream for dinner. I like quarantine.

Me, an intellectual: I’m going to play words with friends and exercise my brain. Also me: damn I wish I had another A

Me after checking my 401k

Now that this pandemic is coming after my livelihood, the memes and jokes aren’t funny anymore. Please, for the love of whatever God you do/do not believe in, just stay the fuck inside. #CoronavirusOutbreak

Someone get Betty White to a safe bunker THIS INSTANT. #coronavirus

Barb: *photoshops a picture of Hannah Ann’s face over Madi’s* #TheBachelor

Me waiting to find out why Kelley’s appreance was so important #TheBachelor