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haley Profile
haley

@haley_darling

Followers
17,604
Following
761
Media
12,166
Statuses
69,805

| crohn’s & uc advocate | sports minded | curb your enthusiasm buff | dog lover | swiftie | karaoke star | classic rock fanatic | old soul | bon vivant |⚡️|

mpls
Joined March 2011
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@haley_darling
haley
4 years
Olive Garden is trending so just a reminder that this amazing meme exists.
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@haley_darling
haley
2 years
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@haley_darling
haley
3 years
Happy Draft Day to the Minnesota Vikings and only the Minnesota Vikings.
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@haley_darling
haley
1 year
I hope someday someone loves me as much as Cris Collinsworth loves Aaron Rodgers.
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@haley_darling
haley
2 years
What time do the Packers play today?
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@haley_darling
haley
3 years
Hear me out: the Super Bowl but the Vikings play in it.
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@haley_darling
haley
1 year
Don’t be sad, Cowboys fans. Yankees pitchers and catchers report to spring training on February 13.
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@haley_darling
haley
4 years
Thank God Kirk is ok with dying because the o-line does not give a fuck about him.
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@haley_darling
haley
2 years
The hardest jobs to have in 2021: frontline workers, teachers, law enforcement, and the Vikings employee that had to tell Mike Zimmer that Kirk Cousins has Covid-19.
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@haley_darling
haley
2 years
My mom just called me and said “skol, bitch” and hung up.
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@haley_darling
haley
2 years
🚨BREAKING NEWS🚨 After five and a half long days, I get to leave the hospital today!
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@haley_darling
haley
3 years
Taco John’s is far superior to Taco Bell.
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@haley_darling
haley
2 years
Good morning to everyone except Aaron Rodgers, the Green Bay Packers, and the entire state of Wisconsin.
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@haley_darling
haley
4 years
If anyone is looking for a wife that stress cleans before big games while bumping 90s hip hop...hit me up.
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@haley_darling
haley
3 years
Just saw that you can have 3,000 fans at Target Center for Wolves games. That seems like a lot compared to what they’re used to.
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@haley_darling
haley
2 years
My new friend Alex.
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@haley_darling
haley
4 years
Looking for the @Vikings first loss
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@haley_darling
haley
2 years
Do you think Stefon Diggs will blame Kirk Cousins for the terrible run the Bills are on?
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@haley_darling
haley
2 years
I left my glue at home.
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@haley_darling
haley
2 years
Steve from Sauk Rapids if you never come to Minneapolis or St. Paul why are you concerned about showing your vaccination card?
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@haley_darling
haley
5 months
The Vikings prepared less for this game than Common does for his show.
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@haley_darling
haley
2 years
AND THE SILENCE YOU HEAR IS LAMBEAU FIELD
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@haley_darling
haley
5 years
Hot take: I hate the Packers
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@haley_darling
haley
2 years
Happy birthday to me
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@haley_darling
haley
2 years
Pineapple belongs on pizza. I will die on this hill.
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@haley_darling
haley
3 years
Kirk Cousins is the ex-boyfriend that says he will do anything to get you back but then does absolutely nothing to change his toxic behavior.
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@haley_darling
haley
5 years
I’m not crying, you’re crying
@NadineBabu
Nadine Babu
5 years
Best moment of the game, and it’s not even close. @caseyob14 makes his #Gophers debut. He’s been cancer free for one year!!!!!
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@haley_darling
haley
2 years
This guy asked to take a picture with me.
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@haley_darling
haley
4 years
I 🤍 MPLS
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@haley_darling
haley
2 years
In hell you hear the Kars4Kids jingle on repeat 24/7
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@haley_darling
haley
4 years
OUR GIRL IS BACK!!!!!
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@haley_darling
haley
2 years
It’s bye week but I still made it to The Bank.
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@haley_darling
haley
1 year
Omg it’s a New Year’s Eve Miracle: I’m getting out of the hospital. I can watch football on my couch with delicious takeout. 🥹🥹 God is good all the time!!!
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@haley_darling
haley
3 years
May I suggest Ted Lasso for Timberwolves President of Basketball Operations?
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@haley_darling
haley
4 years
How it started How it’s going
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@haley_darling
haley
1 year
Carlos Correa returning to the Twins is like dumping someone, realizing you couldn’t get anyone hotter, and then crawling back to your ex.
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@haley_darling
haley
1 month
My first surgery in almost three years went great! I’m so grateful for the amazing providers taking care of me and my friends and family for their love and support. Cheers to a happy and healthy rest of the week for all of us. 💜
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@haley_darling
haley
2 years
made it to the cabin just in time for sunset 💛
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@haley_darling
haley
2 years
I’m not a mom but…
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@haley_darling
haley
1 year
Name a better duo, I’ll wait. @MarneyGellner @twin1532
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@haley_darling
haley
1 year
Norm Green still sucks.
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@haley_darling
haley
5 years
The Packers all white uniforms with yellow helmets makes them look like dirty Q-tips.
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@haley_darling
haley
2 years
Night Moves by Bob Seger is a top five greatest song of all time and I will fight anyone who disagrees.
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@haley_darling
haley
1 year
During the last episode of 2022 on @s_a_t_c_podcast I declared that I would get my dream job in 2023. This past week I accomplished that goal and accepted an offer for my dream job. I can’t wait to start March 6th. Cheers to exciting, new beginnings & a happy and healthy year.
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@haley_darling
haley
4 years
I promise I’ll never complain about: - The Twins being 15 games out of first place in July - The Wild losing in the first round of the playoffs - The Wolves being the Wolves - The Vikings choking in prime time - Gopher Football disappointing us in the back half of the season
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@haley_darling
haley
1 year
1. No Axe 2. NFL playoffs Tough place to live.
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@haley_darling
haley
2 years
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@haley_darling
haley
18 days
If I never saw Devin Booker play basketball again, it would be too soon.
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@haley_darling
haley
4 years
No one cares what Russell Wilson said on the sidelines.
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@haley_darling
haley
4 years
I lived bitch.
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@haley_darling
haley
1 year
I was not expecting to spend Christmas and New Year’s in the hospital but here we are. It is actually apropos for the dumpster fire 2022 was for me. I’m grateful for my friends, family, and the amazing opportunities I was given. But, overall 2022 kind of kicked my ass.
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@haley_darling
haley
2 years
. @Vikings please live stream the entire flight home
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@haley_darling
haley
2 years
It’s weird how none of these guys have the same last name.
@BenGoessling
Ben Goessling
2 years
The #Vikings announced nine assistant coaches for Kevin O’Connell’s staff before his press conference this afternoon.
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@haley_darling
haley
3 years
Good morning to everyone except the Ohio State Buckeyes.
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@haley_darling
haley
3 years
I just found out I’m having surgery tomorrow and I’m so happy. I haven’t felt good for two weeks so hopefully this will help me get back to feeling better. All good vibes and prayers are appreciated! Thanks, fam 💜
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@haley_darling
haley
1 year
The cashier at Trader Joe’s asked if she should leave the mistletoe I bought out of the bag incase I “see any handsome dudes in the parking lot”? 😂😂
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@haley_darling
haley
2 years
Rosie’s Angels
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@haley_darling
haley
1 year
You’re hot, I’m hot, and if you’re thirsty I’m a tall drink of water.
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@haley_darling
haley
4 years
“It’s a 61 yard Minneapolis Miracle.”
@CitysEra
Ben
4 years
Commentary which makes this happen, go:
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@haley_darling
haley
3 years
This has been the healthiest summer I’ve had since I was 21. Zero hospitalizations or sick days. Life is good.
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@haley_darling
haley
2 years
US Bank Stadium and on the road.
@PFF_Vikings
PFF MIN Vikings
2 years
Where do the Minnesota Vikings need to improve for the 2022 season?
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@haley_darling
haley
2 years
The Timberwolves collapsed easier than the Metrodome.
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@haley_darling
haley
1 month
Nothing has gone right for me today and I’m having surgery this afternoon so if you could send some prayers up for your girl, I’d appreciate it. 💜
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@haley_darling
haley
2 years
On January 4, 2021 I started working out with Peloton and today I finished my 1,000th workout. Working out with Peloton has exponentionally improved my mental and physical health, given me confidence, and given me another way to connect with my friends.
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@haley_darling
haley
1 year
You guys. We’re 9-2. We won in primetime and our team has ten days of rest ahead.
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@haley_darling
haley
2 years
Life is all about who you want to celebrate the Packers playoff loss with.
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@haley_darling
haley
2 years
I CAN BARELY BRING A LIPGLOSS INTO TARGET CENTER AND THIS LADY BROUGHT A WHOLE ASS CHAIN???
@barstoolsports
Barstool Sports
2 years
No glue this time, they brought a CHAIN
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@haley_darling
haley
2 years
@PatMcAfeeShow @MeatSauce1 Someone at @KFAN1003 needs to make a PA highlight reel for Pat.
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@haley_darling
haley
4 years
Ketchup is overrated and mustard is by far a superior condiment.
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@haley_darling
haley
1 year
My aunt was diagnosed with stage 4 breast cancer in June. After months of chemo and a big surgery weeks ago we found out today that she’s at Stage 2B and tumors shrunk 90%. I could not be more thankful for her strength and for the treatment working. God is good all the time 💜
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@haley_darling
haley
2 years
I was wearing a Gophers sweatshirt this morning and now I’m wearing a Wolves one. If anyone is looking for a girlfriend that dresses like a 14 year old boy, hit me up.
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@haley_darling
haley
4 years
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@haley_darling
haley
5 months
THATS MY QUARTERBACK
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@haley_darling
haley
2 years
🖤
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@haley_darling
haley
2 years
“Life is great. Football is better.” - Steve Sabol
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@haley_darling
haley
3 years
Imagine losing the NFC Championship game and then still having to live in Wisconsin.
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@haley_darling
haley
1 year
People don’t talk enough about how fun Duluth is.
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@haley_darling
haley
1 year
Good morning to everyone except the New York Giants.
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@haley_darling
haley
3 years
Two years ago today I had a huge surgery that took months to recover from and was in the worst spot mentally that I’ve ever been in. This weekend I’m moving into my dream apartment and I’m happier than I’ve ever been. Life is good, friends. Be thankful for everything.
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@haley_darling
haley
5 months
It doesn’t matter who wins this game. We’re all losers for having watched it.
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@haley_darling
haley
2 years
Football.
@NFLonFOX
FOX Sports: NFL
2 years
New Year's resolution time: What would you like your NFL team to get better at in 2022?
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@haley_darling
haley
2 years
We’re still having fun and we’re 6 & 1 💜💛
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@haley_darling
haley
7 months
People I’d rather have at quarterback for the Vikings than Carson Wentz: - Voldemort - a scarecrow - Brett Favre with his arms tied behind his back - Meatsauce - Jaren Hall
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@haley_darling
haley
2 years
I have the world’s cutest wedding date.
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@haley_darling
haley
1 year
💜
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@haley_darling
haley
2 years
Minneapolis: a basketball town.
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@haley_darling
haley
3 years
Aaron Rodgers is a clown. It’s absolutely his choice to remain unvaccinated but he put his team, coaching staff, and other teams at risk by not following protocol. That shows zero respect for others.
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@haley_darling
haley
2 years
Minnesota wins, Wisconsin and Iowa both lose? Did I die and go to heaven?
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@haley_darling
haley
2 years
I didn’t know @Chris_Hawkey ’s sister wrote a cookbook.
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@haley_darling
haley
2 years
34, flirty, and thriving.
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@haley_darling
haley
11 months
I’m not the prom queen but I was voted class clown.
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@haley_darling
haley
2 years
Good morning to everyone except Aaron Rodgers.
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@haley_darling
haley
3 years
“I love to go to the doctor. Where else would a man look at me and say, 'Take off your clothes'?” - Phyllis Diller Surgery went great. I’m so thankful for my doctor & his team, great nurses, everyone working at the hospital, and everyone who sent well wishes & prayed for me. 💜
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@haley_darling
haley
2 years
Playing Password with my family. The password is “chain.” My dad said “gang” to my mom and she responded, “bang.”
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@haley_darling
haley
2 years
Tell me you’re in Wisconsin without telling me your in Wisconsin. I’ll start: no one was available to ring me up at the gas station because both cashiers were outside smoking.
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@haley_darling
haley
3 years
I showered and put on make up.
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@haley_darling
haley
6 months
5 years ago was one of the worst days of my life. I’d never felt worse physically or mentally. I’m grateful for everyone who helped me get out of that place. Now I have my dream job & have never been so happy & healthy. May the flowers remind us why the rain was so necessary 💜
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@haley_darling
haley
2 years
Is Paige Bueckers from Minnesota? No one has mentioned it.
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@haley_darling
haley
1 year
There’s a guy at the dog park wearing a Gophers sweatshirt. I’m legally required to say “Row the Boat, Ski U Mah, Go Gophers” to him, right?
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@haley_darling
haley
2 years
I made a @PowerTripKFAN meme
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