evanem
@evanempdx
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Speed is better than Die Hard. Artist. Portland born and raised. New Orleans living.
New Orleans, LA
Joined January 2012
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Last Seen Profiles
Pinned Tweet
*NEW EVANEM POSTER PRINT ALERT*
ANT EDWARDS
Now available on the site in 4 different sizes. Tell your mom!
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“Evan says he’s only going to have one drink.
But he told the bartender to leave his card open.
Now why is that?“
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"Just a kid from West Linn" is such a funny sentence to me. Little Ol' West Linn. Ya know, just the third richest city in the entire state of Oregon.
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1. Cronin was able to unload Nurk's terrible contract in this deal while bringing in a 25 year old center who has finals experience.
2. Cronin sent Dame to a contending situation.
3. We get to give a big "fuck you" to Miami Heat fans.
Incredible day to be a Blazers fan
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Wore Blazers gear to the Denver airport thinking people would be giving me shit. One person was like. “Wait, aren’t the Blazers in the playoffs?” No one else said anything. It’s not because Nuggets fans are nice. It’s because there aren’t a lot of Nuggets fans, people.
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This was a design I made and sold on my website 5 years ago. Please don't give this company credit.
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Dame is gonna have to meet Blazers fans in the middle and schedule a championship parade in Milwaukie, OR next summer.
Dame really turned to the bench after the dagger and said “I do this shit” and shrugged 😂😂
This guy is different
#Bucks
#FearTheDeer
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When mom comes home and you see her step out of the whip holding a big ass Papa Murphy’s pizza
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When do we get to the point where Cronin just tells Goodwin, "ok, cool. Tell Dame we'll see him at training camp".
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Neil Olshey gave a quarter of a bllion dollars to Meyers, Moe, ET, Crabbe, and traded up in a draft to take Zach Collins when OG, Bam, John Collins, and Donovan Mitchell were available, and those two things still aren't close to the worst thing he's done as Blazers GM.
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Love that
@mehdirhasan
had
@rabiasquared
on to talk Hae/Adnan. May Adnan get released tomorrow, and investigators find justice for Hae and her loved ones. Also, yes, that is an evanem original painting of Adnan in the background.
Adnan Syed, who was made famous by the “Serial” podcast, could be released from prison tomorrow after an investigation revealed new information in his case. His childhood friend
@rabiasquared
tells
@MehdiRHasan
how she’s feeling right now. WATCH:
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Phil Knight and Dame in the locker room as Dame is lacing up his adidas before every game...
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*NEW PAINTING ALERT*
The GOAT.
@carmeloanthony
x Rose City. Even if he doesn't suit up for Portland again, we will always have this.
Think you peeps can help retweet this enough until he sees it? Let's goooooo
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No. It’s when they discontinued the chalupa promotion. No question.
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Name a bigger downgrade
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In Zion's 3 career games against the Suns, he shot 76% from the field and had an offensive rating of 138.
People talk about Zion Williamson coming back.
Trust me. We ain’t worried about him.
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Again, I would like to express my gratitude for the Charlotte Hornets, for taking Brandon Miller number 2 in this last draft.
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Put CJ Elleby and Bill Walton in a small room with a loaded bong and a video camera. Let’s get weird.
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Our dude Damian Lillard will miss the playoffs for the first time in 9 years.
HUGE bummer.
Here is a thread of him and former teammates who ARE in this year's playoffs.
Starting it off with Nik Stauskas (now Celtics).
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Gary Trent Jr. is sitting somewhere right now, whispering to himself, "thank fucking god".
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Gave the “hey CJ! Thank you” prayer hands as he just walked back to the locker room. He saw the Blazers gear and gave me the head nod.
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Total points since CJ was traded to the Pelicans:
CJ McCollum - 2,283
Brandon Ingram - 1,487
Zion Williamson - 840
CJ McCollum came up HUGE in the Pelicans' thrilling win in OKC 😤
29 PTS
11 REB
5 AST
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@FearTheBrown
How you know Jaxson Hayes didn’t do anything crazy: the cops send a letter asking the league to punish him, instead of charging him with a serious crime. Pathetic.
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Fuck it. Just bought a ticket behind the Pelicans bench for tomorrow night's game. Gotta show support for CJ!
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The Blazers are one of 2 teams in the league who have 3 dudes averaging +20PPG.
Without looking it up, who is the other team?
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100% of sales on the site this weekend will be donated to the National Domestic Violence Hotline
Billups -- the 2004 NBA Finals MVP -- was offered the Trail Blazers job tonight and will be the new Portland coach.
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From the Blazers organization putting him on his deathbed to now starting in a playoff game 8 weeks later. What an inspiration.
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I'm not an NBA conspiracy theorist, but the Blazers are gonna have to win CONVINCINGLY tonight in order to get a W. The refs are not going to be doing us any favors.
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When I mentioned that CJ is going to be the veteran presence that the Pelicans need in their locker room, a dude told me that CJ isn’t even a leader.
He’s the freaking President of the NBPA. Literally the leader of ALL of the players in the NBA. Come on, dawg.
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Ok so yeah, there is a dude down here in the French Quarter in New Orleans, ROCKING AN OLYMPIC DAME JERSEY!!!
Happy Mardi Gras. We out here
@Dame_Lillard
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I feel bad for you if you cannot get excited about Scoot Henderson.
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There was no media there. Dame didn't post about it on social media before or after his arrival. He just showed up. Because he wanted to be there for his community. That's the type of dude he is. Will forever be grateful to have watched him play for my fav team. Thanks, Dame!
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JERAMI JUST SIGNED A ONE HUNDRED AND SIXTY MILLION DOLLAR CONTRACT AND HE'S FLYING FRONTIER?!?!
Truly a man of the people.
As if it couldn’t get weirder my flight gets canceled (never doing Frontier again) and
@JeramiGrant
is on my flight. Kind enough for a pick and a fist bump. So glad we’ll have him for five more years.
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Had a booth at an event in NE Portland that was helping prep elementary school kids for the new school year back in like 2014? Someone who knew someone who knew a person who claimed to know Dame said that they thought they could get him to show up to hang with the kids 1/
Ya know what? Let’s celebrate the Lillard era in Portland…
What is your favorite memory of Damian Lillard?
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Paul George just shivered when he saw this highlight.
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The Blazers FO/marketing needs to run with this pitch from Melo when trying to lure players to Portland:
"I wish I could have gone there (Portland) sooner than I did."
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Ok sure, but the difference is that one team is CLEARLY trying to tank and the other team just sucks...
It's been tough sledding for the Lakers and Blazers since the All-Star break.
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The damage this man has done to Heat fans is remarkable...
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There is a dude on Blazers Twitter who legit thinks we should trade Ant.
Here is the list of dudes in the league who are 23 years old or younger averaging at least 23.2PPG:
Luka
Ja
Zion
Ant
Some people, bruh...
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I really hope Shaedon brings out Lebron and uses him as a prop again.
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I don’t know if any of you caught it, but the broadcast cut to the Nuggets bench in the first half when we were getting out asses kicked and they were laughing like maniacs. I want that footage so I can tattoo it on my eye lids. Thank you.
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Our King
Damian Lillard wants to stay in Portland
“For me, my heart is Portland Trail Blazer. I want to win it. I know that I have a plan that’s going to put me on my best level when I come back to play. And I want our team to fit that.”
(Via )
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To be clear, as a Blazers fan, I really hope that Josh Hart is a Blazer next season and moving forward.
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Blazers got their 5th road win of the season tonight.
We didn’t record our 5th road win of last season until January 21st.
Holy shit.
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"I told Josh (Hart) he's always welcome back in New Orleans" - CJ McCollum.
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My short list of dudes who I wish could have worked out for the Blazers, but for whatever reason it didn’t happen:
Gary Trent Jr
Larry Nance
Josh Hart
Those three dudes rule.
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Name the most random dude to play on a Damian Lillard roster.
I'll start.
Luis Montero
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lol Terry coached a team with a front court of Aminu, Harkless and Enes Kanter to the WCF, but go off, king.
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Number of times making the playoffs in the last 10 seasons:
Blazers - 8
Heat - 7
@JCigan
@Real_JPIII
@ripcityhappyguy
@DannyMarang
Portland trailblazers really?
Haven’t been to the playoffs since George W Bush SR
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The beauty of what Joe just did was make it so that Giannis may not be so inclined to leave Milwaukie for a place like, say, MIAMI in the next 4 seasons. Incredible.
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*NEW EVANEM TEE ALERT*
WHAT HAPPENS IN VEGAS
BELONGS TO PORTLAND
2022 SL CHAMPS
This is a pre order. Ends in a week before I get it to the print shop.
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Ae a fellow Blazers fan, we’ve always wished that Dame could be paired with an all star level wing.
How ironic that it was CJ who got paired with Brandon Ingram.
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Damian Lillard carrying the Blazers roster to the playoffs every year.
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As someone who has worked in advertising/tech/market research over the last 15 years?
Big, big deal.
In final rule, FTC bans non-compete clauses for *all* workers!
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Blazers fans were robbed of Ime. Ugh
When Ime Udoka was named coach of the Celtics, he reached back to his Northeast Portland roots to hire two pivotal assistants.
That connection is powering Boston as they head to the playoffs.
More:
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I think this is the point.
So technically Haynes wasn’t lying when he reported that Dame would be willing to come back. But for just long enough for Miami to try to figure it out.
The consolation prize for Dame is now he’s a favorite to win the NBA title.
How dare Joe.
As far as other reporting from the Athletic, Lillard was basically willing to start the season to give the Blazers more time to find a deal. Not that he was necessarily going to commit long term.
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All Time Blazers Rankings:
1. Dame
2. Andre Miller
3. Josh Hart
4. BRoy
5. Walton
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In 2016, the Blazers signed Moe, Meyers, ET, and Crabbe to a combined $226 million. If we can’t trade Whiteside, Neil will have turned those contracts in to Trevor Ariza, Caleb Swanigan, and Wenyen Gabriel. Yeah, that’s a tough pill to swallow.
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This is how I feel it likely went down. Disclaimer that I am not an insider. No one has told me all of what I am laying out.
-Dame wanted to stay in Portland
-Dame wanted the team to try to build a contender
-Originally Joe wanted that
1/
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The Blazers wouldn't be able to hang up fast enough.
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It’s so insane how useless Kanter is to every other team he plays for, but how important he is to the blazers.
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On his new podcast (recorded late last night, dropped this morning) Bill Simmons lists all of the guards who he thinks could be on an All NBA team (first, second and third teams).
Damian Lillard’s name was not even mentioned.
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I leave the city for 6 months and that douche Marky from
@portlandgear
pulls this bullshit? Forever fuck him and his fake ass company.
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Really disappointing loss. Heat give up a 16-point lead to the Nets, outscored 34-22 in the fourth quarter and lose, 109-105.
Heat drop to 1-4. A Cade Cunningham missed 3 on opening night from being 0-5.
Still too early to sound the alarms, but finger over the button.
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The most devastating thing about the predicament we’re in is that we elected a dude who didn’t even want to be President. And it has literally cost us hundreds of thousands of lives.
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Thanks to everyone who has reached out. We are safe.
No power, and spotty cell coverage. Hoping both things change relatively soon.
Always remember. Blazers in 6
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Blazers fans: WHY WONT PLAYERS SIGN AS FREE AGENTS TO PLAY IN PORTLAND?
Jerami Grant signs a new deal to stay in Portland.
Blazers fans: OK BUT NOT HIM
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Josh is a stand up dude. Last year, when the Pelicans traded him to Portland for CJ, he went to that next Pelicans game before heading to Portland and sat courtside to cheer on his guys. Extremely awesome gesture.
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So many teams hired some awesome coaches this off season.
This will haunt my dreams for years.
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It’s so wild how in the same week
#ripcity
went from hearing how Jody Allen wanted to be a “Trail Blazer” by signing Becky Hammon to be the first women NBA coach, to Neil signing his homie Chauncey, a dude who has some serious, and credible, allegations stacked against him
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So the Blazers turned RFA Gary Trent Jr into Eric Bledsoe, Justice Winslow, some other guy, and a 2nd.
Brutal.
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As a Blazers fan, the thing I have most been looking forward to over the last few months was Shaedon in the dunk contest. I know it's stupid, but I am legit bummed by that. Wish someone (Dame, Chauncey, someone) would go to him and tell him it's fine to participate. Go have fun
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Neil Olshey has been employed by the Blazers for 8+ seasons because of the work and scouting that Chad Buchanan and team put into drafting Damian Lillard.
It’s honestly that simple.
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Now that GoT is over, do yourself a favor and catch up with Better Call Saul, the best show on television.
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My Blazers are truly in a league of their own.
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Wait
Colin Kaepernick directing traffic in Oregon after a blizzard hit the city ⛄️
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