Dr Helen Ingram
@drhingram
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Notorious Brummie. Historian of magic and religion in the ancient world. Cocktail hound. Funeral organist. Theologian. Gg-daughter of a Peaky Blinder.
Joined February 2009
Pretty sure we could test the entire UK in 24hrs if we let Aldi checkout assistants run the testing centres.
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I’ve fallen in love with this Nosferatu candle holder
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I have a PhD in demonology, necromancy and curses in the ancient world. Come at me, bros.
The 'basement guys' trolling this woman showing off her PhD owned themselves so hard it's hilarious.
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While we’re worrying about AI, the bollards are planning a global revolution
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We’ve reached that point in the week where we would all benefit from seeing some baby bats eating bananas
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My body is not a temple, it is a Catholic church. Full of wine, bread and guilt.
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Developers bought the iconic Black Country pub The Crooked House (building built in 1765) and it mysteriously burnt down last night. This happens every single time a pub is bought across Birmingham. Starting to feel like ‘housing developer’ is code for ‘arsonist’.
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Pray for all those lost soles.
🚨 NEW: Shoe Zone in Hull town centre has been looted and set on fire
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An ancient artefact of the Homeric age, courtesy of Joshua Goode
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Why does it look like he’s about to shoot down a water slide?.
🔴 Vatican releases images of Pope Francis in open coffin. Follow the latest ⬇️.
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What a beautiful ancient Mesopotamian cuneiform tablet. I wonder what ageless wisdom it conveys?
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It’s a little known fact that the Vikings covered the roof of their houses with grass so that enemy aircraft bombers couldn’t see them
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Petition for the carousel horse to appear on EVERY movie poster for the remainder of the year
Florence Pugh and Andrew Garfield in John Crowley’s ‘WE LIVE IN TIME’. 📷
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That’s life. One day they’re celebrating your birth, three days later they’re celebrating your execution.
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Nothing beats getting home from work, kicking off your shoes, pouring a glass and settling down with a good book
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It really annoys me when people use the wrong word and don’t have the humidity to admit it.
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A tenner says he’s a vegan cyclist who showers once a week and leads mindfulness workshops for under fives at the weekend
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I tried donating blood today. Never again. Way too many questions. Whose blood is that? Where did you get it from? Why is it in a bucket?.
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Buying this for when the police come and tell me that my rich husband died in mysterious circumstances
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When I woke up this morning I didn’t think I’d end the day explaining to a lovely police officer (who kept it together very well) exactly how a man was having sex with an electricity box on the street.
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Waking up to all the Aurora Borealis photos when I slept through the entire thing #NorthernLights
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There’s a little village outside Birmingham called Frankley and this morning someone ‘enhanced’ the place name sign
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Happy birthday Søren Kierkegaard. We can feel the flames.
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I’m sorely tempted to buy a Freudian slip (to go with my Freudian slippers)
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Buying a biblically accurate angel for the top of the Theology Faculty biblically accurate Christmas tree
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Please please please let this be the second half to the Jaguar advert
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Today marks the anniversary of J.R.R. Tolkien’s death. The professor certainly knew how to throw a party.
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My elderly neighbour has given me this for my garden. It’s going to come alive and kill me in the night, isn’t it?
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There’s a blood-red moon over the UK tonight. A beautiful spectacle.
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Hello Police Scotland? I’d like to report a hate crime
Scotland's new hate crime law comes into force
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I wonder whether there will be a mass at his funeral?.
Peter Higgs, physicist who theorised Higgs boson, dies aged 94
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“And here’s a routine I call Tracey’s Had A Few Vodkas”
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Don’t forget to leave some bread and fish out for Jesus when he delivers your Easter eggs down the chimney tonight.
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The Swedish word for goat is 'get' and the Swedish for kid is 'killing', resulting in this creepy instruction in a children’s educational book
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An Egyptian figurine of a woman baking bread. And not, as I first thought, a little elf watching TV.
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It will be like The Hunger Games in Birmingham this weekend
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Told my friend's daughter that Kinder Eggs are actually Minion coffins. Now she's crying and I feel like Satan. http://t.co/nqFH3usU97.
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If they open the tomb and release an undead Santa and his zombie elf hordes that would be the perfect end to 2024.
Archaeologists in Türkiye believe they have discovered the tomb of Saint Nicholas, famously known as Santa Claus 🇹🇷
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If Coldplay’s Chris Martin has apologised to India for being British when is he going to apologise to the British for filling their radio airwaves with dribbling shite for the past 25 years?.
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During this warm spell of weather in the UK please remember that car interiors can get extremely hot. Always ensure that you do not leave chocolate bars in parked cars. They’ll be absolutely ruined. Same goes for kids and pets apparently.
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We all need a Persian demon to tuck us into bed, feed us soup and fix our mascara
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If you think society is bad now, wait until 2040 when we’re governed by people who were home-schooled by day drinkers.
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Not many places can say this, but one of the best things about Birmingham is the very cool graffiti. Even in the remote countryside areas, like these foxes.
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Jesus, Mary and the Holy Cookie Monster (when you see it)
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I’m not qualified to be PM, but I do know that Mother’s Day is the perfect opportunity to send good wishes across all communities, to show support for women, compassion with those who have lost loved ones and solidarity on a human level. But what do I know, @Keir_Starmer.
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Not sure whether he has a question or he’s about to invade Poland
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“I am the Ghost of Christmas Future Imperfect Conditional” said the Spirit. “I bring news of what would have been going to happen, if you were not to have been going to change your ways.”.
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I see the poster spellcheckers in Bristol have been furloughed
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While I nodded, nearly napping,.Suddenly there came a tapping,.As of someone gently trotting,.Trotting ‘cross my chamber floor. “Thou hast eaten,” I muttered, “I shall not feed you any more”.Quoth the kitty “feed me more”
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St. Politesmile, the patron saint of women who don’t want to talk on public transport
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The patron saint of Twitter.
"I see that you have made 3 spelling mistakes." Last words of Marquis de Favras after reading his death sentence before being hanged (1790).
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To be fair if I was bored out my mind recovering from an operation, I’d create chaos for the memes too.
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This cat looks like a Brian, 48, single and looking for fun
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Every time I go into Birmingham city centre I come away siding with whichever superpower wants to nuke us right now.
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Hearing lots of similar reports. Not saying this is the case here, it could be a genuine accident. But we should be mindful that more pubs might fall victim to this ‘fire epidemic’ that is destroying our pub heritage.
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